Kimmie80 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Ok, here is my situation.... Back in April I had a service guy come out to my house and he instantly was attracted to me. From that point on, we had communicated every day, from the time he got up in the morning to the time he went to bed. We would meet up as much as we could, and it was very special each and every time. As soon as we would part, he would text me how much he enjoyed our time together. And how he misses me already. Well everything changed 2 months later. The end of June he had taken me up to a beautiful little cottage on the lake. We went further than we ever had, however, not all the way. I was not completely ready. He was fine with that. We talked for a few time later that day, but then nothing. I did not hear from him for 2 days. I instantly sent him 2 nasty emails basically bashing him, telling him that I he used me, he wont talk to me because we didnt go all the way, and that he didn't like what he saw. By the end of the 3rd day he came in contact with me. He was very upset and hurt. He said he sees how I really feel and said his goodbyes. Apparently his services was cut due to his bill being overdue. I do believe this because I did try to call him during those 2 days and the operator said the service has been disconnected. His last words to me was " I do forgive, but everything happens for a reason. Im sure our paths will cross again someday". So my question is, it has been a month since he had told me this. Have any of you guys out there had an insecure girl like me that turned you off, but you eventually came back? I know EVERY relationship and every person is different, just looking to see what other people have done in this situation. This was the one and only issue that arose during the 2 amazing months we had. But it is a very bad one I am taking the time to work on my self-esteem issues and I am doing a lot of self exploring and self work.
Philosoraptor Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 This bridge may have been burned as he likely doesn't see you as stable now. I've dated some insecure girls and had to cut ties as it becomes too stressful not knowing what is going to set them off. Not saying this is the case with you, but he seems to have seen something that he isn't comfortable with and decided to cut the line. Good on you for working on your issues. Hopefully you can prevent insecure feelings and outbursts in the future.
chinacat sunflower Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 I was in a very similar situation. He left and never looked back. Maybe they will come back sometime down the line....but who's to say? Try focusing on you. Do things that make you happy, lift your spirits. Take it as a lesson well learned. It's a crappy feeling that I messed up something great. But don't forget it takes two to tango.........Hope you feel better soon.
esteem-jam Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 (edited) His last words to me was " I do forgive, but everything happens for a reason. Im sure our paths will cross again someday". It would be better if YOUR last words were something alike : I am sorry. I let my fears/insecurities impact our relationship. I hope you will understand. I liked you and I still do. I hope you can forgive me, because I value you a lot. From his point it could look like this. He rents a cottage house, which is a nice setting for lovey-dovey. But then he gets "nothing". He can say one thing, but think the other. Not sure how well was your communication after. But you should have let him know afterwards that he still will get what he invested for. Cause it is really guys who hate to get used. Investing so much and getting nothing at end. Man`s ego is more fragile than woman`s. Next morning you should have had made a cake or something else to make up for it. Saying to him that he did not like what he saw is... he rented the house, he wanted to be with you, those are facts, dont go against the facts. This song comes to mind Morcheeba - Fear and Love Edited August 16, 2013 by esteem-jam
tinker683 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 You overreacted to something that may have been completely innocuous. It happens to the best of us, please don't beat yourself up over this, we're only human and we're all prone to mistakes. At this point I think the only thing you can do is send him some sort of communicate that states something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have acted the way that I did, I really did enjoy the time I spent with you and hope you will contact me again in the future." And then leave it at that. Put the ball into his court and get on with the business of working on yourself so this doesn't happen again in the future. Maybe he'll contact you again, maybe he won't. If he does, fantastic! You'll get another chance to do it right this time. If he doesn't, well then you learned something from it and you'll become a better person as a result. You might not ever see him again and that will hurt...but you will eventually move on.
Author Kimmie80 Posted August 16, 2013 Author Posted August 16, 2013 I have sent him 3 emails expressing how sincerely sorry I was and why I had overreacted. Expressing how much I miss him, our meetings out "our" park on the lake, our talks, texts and emails all day long. Also at night when we both could not sleep. He knows the relationship I had just gotten out of was verbally and physically abusive and that I was cheated on when I was pregnant 3 years ago. He did respond to all 3, saying that he does forgive me, but that everything happens for a reason. And thats when said "Im sure our paths will cross again someday". That was probably just his way of letting me go gently. I never emailed him back after that. It know has been 28 days, but whos counting lol. That song that you, esteem-jam, attached, thats so beautiful and true. Thank you for that 1
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