emmierayne Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 My ex told me 2 months ago that he needed a break, that the only thing changing was the titles. We both were under a lot of stress and couldn't find a place to go together. He told me he would store my stuff and so he has it. Then he is almost impossible to get a hold of. but if I go a while without texting him he texts me. He stopped saying he loves me until this previous Sunday. I went and put my foot down for my movies and stuff. I thought I would just get the stuff and leave. But he pulled me in and hugged me. He told me he still cares and still loves me he just doesnt know if he is in love with me and that it is killing him. and he couldnt stop hugging me. then he kissed me and I kept pushing him away. I dont know what he is doing. Then he gave me his body spray to use to help me sleep. I am really in love with him and would do anything for him. Is he planning on coming back or not?
Philosoraptor Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 Sounds like he has you hooked and confused right now. Is he seeing other people while trying to "figure himself out"? Not saying this is the case here (too few details), but oftentimes the dumper will keep the dumpee around as a backup plan just in case "figuring himself out" doesn't work out the way he planned.
Author emmierayne Posted August 15, 2013 Author Posted August 15, 2013 he has slept around in the last month since we haven't seen each other. And frankly I cant fault him for that. People have physical needs. But every time I try to cut the ties he more or less begs me not to. He tells me that if he could he would have me there with him but it isn't his place. And when I told him not to give me hope he asked if he had told me there was none and I told him no. He said dont push him away. He wants me to come visit this weekend if he can get the ok
Philosoraptor Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 So he wants to get his rocks off a bit and for you to wait for him as his backup option? Are you comfortable with this? If not, then cut contact and don't let him drag you back anymore. If he truly wanted to be with you he would be with you, not sleeping around with other women.
BC1980 Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 In my experience, people who are confused don't magically become certain of a relationship. I think you have to be the strong one and walk away because he will keep you around for a long time if you let him. He is confused. Not you. Don't let him make you suffer.
newmoon Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 My ex told me 2 months ago that he needed a break, that the only thing changing was the titles. We both were under a lot of stress and couldn't find a place to go together. He told me he would store my stuff and so he has it. Then he is almost impossible to get a hold of. but if I go a while without texting him he texts me. He stopped saying he loves me until this previous Sunday. I went and put my foot down for my movies and stuff. I thought I would just get the stuff and leave. But he pulled me in and hugged me. He told me he still cares and still loves me he just doesnt know if he is in love with me and that it is killing him. and he couldnt stop hugging me. then he kissed me and I kept pushing him away. I dont know what he is doing. Then he gave me his body spray to use to help me sleep. I am really in love with him and would do anything for him. Is he planning on coming back or not? It sounds like he is keeping you around while exploring his options sexually and through dates with others. That would indicate there is something about you that doesn't incline him to stick around or come back. Don't be the back-up. My bf also wanted space and time to reevaluate, but he stayed single and hasn't been sexually active since the split. I once asked (on LS I think) if a guy can go without for a period of time. It sounded lame, but I wanted to know. The resounding answer was yes. So, despite 'physical needs' if a guy is just taking some time he won't be sleeping around within the first few days/month. That is completely different - he is making emotional connections with others.
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