I haven't spoken to him for a year and a half, I still miss him?

[Charlotted29]

I had known him for 9 years, in those first few years in my late teens he was my bf until he broke it off when a family member died and he needed to grieve. I didn't see him for another year as he moved on with another girl.

 

After that ended we became close again for years, at first we were like best friends but that developed into more and we became a kind of couple but a non committed relationship. I was over at every Christmas and family event, he was the only man in my life I have felt contented with.

 

Over time I fell for him, head over heels..but he didn't want the commitment. Our relationship started to break down as he started seeing someone without telling me until it got serious with her.

I broke off our friendship/relationship soon after as all the heartache was too much and the lies.

 

After a year and a half I still haven't moved on and think of him every day... he once called me his soulmate, does he not miss me at all? I just can't get over how he's not in my life anymore and still with this girl.

[richard9]

Unfortunately it sounds like he means a hell of a lot more to you than you do to him. Compounded by the fact that you have never really considered anyone else but him.

 

You really need to stop putting your life on hold for this guy. He is out living his life, you need to go out and live yours.

 

There are other guys out there you just need to give them a chance.

 

I was (am still to a degree) like you in that I believed she was the one, I believed we were soul mates. But we are no longer together and I need to live my life, I cant wait for something that may never happen. I owe it to myself and my family to live and try to make the best of things.

 

Keep pushing yourself to meet new people, if you are invited out push yourself to go.

 

You need to let go. There must be someone else for you out there, as I (try) to believe there is someone out there for me.

 

Good Luck.

[heartshapedrocks]

I'm sorry to hear your story but the fact is he is not with you anymore.

Gone.

Kaput.

Moved on.

I know it's a jagged pill to swallow as the song says...in fact, listen to Alanis's album full glass shattering volume & pound on a pillow.

Trust me, I only tell you this because I experienced a similar situation.

The grieving process is different for everyone but there are good suggestions on here.

Try to be mindful staying in the moment.

When I get thoughts that are not beneficial I visually picture a Zamboni in my mind with Snoopy driving it cleaning the ice making a new sheet ready for the next skating session.

It cleans up my busy head and centers me into the moment.

That is all we got.

Hugs & take care of yourself.

[Charlotted29]

Hey guys, thank you for the kind replies. I'm not sure what I expecting answer wise, perhaps some kind of hope? realistically I know there is no hope, he's gone and that's that!

 

I need to take on board both of your advice really and put it into practice! Go out more, meet new people, listen to Alanis and most importantly live for the moment! (I like the snoopy driving idea) to take my mind off him.

 

One day, hopefully i'll be free of missing him in my mind x

[Dazzee]

This pains me to read. I feel as though I will never get over my ex. I think about her every second of everyday (it's only been a week but she meant everything to me). Good luck to you, I will probably be the same a year from now..

[Omei]

Some of us will always always love the ones who left us, I mean we didn't leave we were happy right? (some of us) All you can do is go on living life and hope that one day someone else will show us we can love them just as much if not MORE so the past will be a faint memory. I hope you find it :-]

 

That's what I do im still very like you:'(