tcd421 Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 I find my self in a very uncomfortable place right now. i was in a relationship for over 3 years, had our share of issues till someone else came in to my life. It was enough that i ended my relationship to go after my new interest and after 2 months i realized what a mistake that was. I did not go running back to my ex even though i knew she would forgive me. I stayed single met went on some dates with other i kept finding my self becoming increasingly frustrated by it. then june I just gave up and went back to my ex. I knew somethings about her were not going to change no matter how i wanted to help her change. and now as of today I am thinking about ending it permanently, its just not was it was almost 4 years ago and still not working for me.
Angry bird Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 Wow, I feel bad for your girlfriend. I often think about if my x will return, and if he did, would he leave again. I guess most likely, yes. How did she react when you returned after 6 months? What did you (honestly) say o get her to trust you again? 1
Misfortune Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 There were issues which you exhausted yourself to fix, right? Did you leave her before getting with your someone else? Why would things be the same? You ran from the relationship and probably abandoned her or tried to be her "friend". You went about getting those "perfection" sparks from new relationships and that didn't pan out so you settled for your ex. You came back and everything should be A ok. How does she feel about what you did? Don't you think she worries everyday about you leaving her again? Are these things she won't change deal breakers to you? 2
JDPT Posted August 15, 2013 Posted August 15, 2013 You need to think long and hard before executing. I think you are very emotional and act on impulse. And clearly didn't attempt to get over your ex the first time around hence why you are back to square one with her. Make up your mind and follow through with it. Analyze these issues form an objective perspective and arrive at a solid conclusion. Take your time to think about all of this. 1
Author tcd421 Posted August 15, 2013 Author Posted August 15, 2013 (edited) So, let me get this straight, you were in a LTR, cheated, left for the OW, left the OW, dabbled in dating then went crawling back to your ex because you were tired of dating? And you thought this would work out...why? The spark was gone and when that happens it usually doesn't return just because you did and it certainly doesn't return because you went back out of boredom/frustration. Nowhere in your post did you say you got back with her out of love. I really just feel sorry for your girlfriend because I'm sure you've given her a shiny, brand spanking new set of trust issues. Well OW left me, after she got what she wanted out of me, and i have had NC with her since about mid april, and who i back with pretty much had faith that i would come back to her all along though she never stooped to begging. I know my behavior though the last 8 months has not been the best. did some things am not proud of, in spite of my age i don't have a lot of experience with women. I didn't start dating really till i was 30 years old am 40 as if last april, But that is no excuse. Edited August 15, 2013 by tcd421
Misfortune Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Well OW left me, after she got what she wanted out of me, and i have had NC with her since about mid april, and who i back with pretty much had faith that i would come back to her all along though she never stooped to begging. I know my behavior though the last 8 months has not been the best. did some things am not proud of, in spite of my age i don't have a lot of experience with women. I didn't start dating really till i was 30 years old am 40 as if last april, But that is no excuse. You left when things got tough, "found yourself" as the pros say -_-, came back and you expect perfection? Of course you're "Falling out of love", you experienced the best "love"(infatuation) when your old relationship got stale and you probably got your expectation bar on the moon now. 3
Zomb Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 I find my self in a very uncomfortable place right now. i was in a relationship for over 3 years, had our share of issues till someone else came in to my life. It was enough that i ended my relationship to go after my new interest and after 2 months i realized what a mistake that was. I did not go running back to my ex even though i knew she would forgive me. I stayed single met went on some dates with other i kept finding my self becoming increasingly frustrated by it. then june I just gave up and went back to my ex. I knew somethings about her were not going to change no matter how i wanted to help her change. and now as of today I am thinking about ending it permanently, its just not was it was almost 4 years ago and still not working for me. You have to grow up a little and understand that relationships are not like in the movies... I feel bad for your GF... 2
newmoon Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 too bad your girlfriend might not know about LS and going NC. if she'd been smart enough to be NC the first time and let you completely go then she wouldn't suffer hurt again by having taken you back. you're indecisive and it's hurting others' feelings... :-( 1
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