PlumPrincess Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 but she has a few features that can easily be unattractive. First of all, she is quite short (like 5ft 2in) WTF? No wonder some people are single...
Star Gazer Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Yeah ,but you can't buy the # 2 excuse....it doesn't hold water...because if you log on and see her "online now" all the time then you know she's not really serious about the guy. After about a week or so of seeing her "Online Now" status (in her case she's really obvious because she's an "upgraded member" on POF)...I send a follow-up email saying, "Hey, noticed you're still on here....guess things aren't working out with that guy that you told me about." Or something to that effect. OMG. What business is it of yours to say things like this? Maybe she's enjoying dating him but not quite ready to take her profile down? Maybe she's checking up on him? It's not your place to comment! In all likelihood, she was trying to just give you a polite excuse instead of telling you she doesn't like you. You're only making matters worse for yourself. 1
tbf Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 This is why it's best to give as little information as possible, so people don't end up stalking you. Regardless of your reasoning for not wanting to date the individual messaging you, don't respond. 1
joystickd Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Here is a suggestion instead of coming up with creative excuses just say no or "Sorry, you are just not my type" and leave it at that. The reason most of you women still get messages is because they are from men who lack an understanding of the game. Plus it's more respectable to be real and honest instead of creatively lying to give a reason to not be interested in someone. Women are afforded the right to say No!
Imajerk17 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 (edited) There's this woman in my area locally, I emailed her on POF, but she said she's holding out for a guy that isn't ready to commit, so until he removes his profile from POF...that's the condition until she will do the same. Otherwise, it's just a Mexican stand-off. That being said......question......., do women actually hold out for guys that aren't interested in them and WILL turn down other men that ask these women out? I recall a movie or TV show that mimicked this...apparently this high school guy asked a girl to the prom, but she told him she's "Waiting for such and such guy to ask her". Is this an exercise in futility? When I first started doing OLD, I had a "respond to anyone who writes me" policy. So when I would get a nice email from a woman whom I wasn't into going by her profile (and I know my physical type so if the pics don't do it for me) I would write her back saying that I was seeing too many people already. I would tell the woman that even if I wasn't seeing anyone at the time. Why did I do that? I could have either (a) not respond at all (which struck me as not cool at the time--I hadn't done OLD before so I wasn't used to not replying to nice emails), (b) respond with the "not interested" button (that also seemed callous), © respond with "you're not my physical type" (seemed TMI to me in a cruel way) (d) respond with "I don't think we're a match" (which given how great the text of her profile was, was a lot like © ). None of the above options struck me as good so I went with "I'm seeing too many people". It wasn't a total lie, doesn't the fact that I was waiting for at least one of the 5 women I *was* excited about to write me back count? See where I'm going with this? This woman was basically saying she's not interested. By writing her back as you did you came across as this annoying gadfly who has nothing better going on. irc, every time you write one of your threads, it is always about the women. Don't you ever look at YOURSELF and wonder how YOU need to change to be successful with women? Edited August 16, 2013 by Imajerk17 1
PlumPrincess Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 When I first started doing OLD, I had a "respond to anyone who writes me" policy. So when I would get a nice email from a woman whom I wasn't into going by her profile (and I know my physical type so if the pics don't do it for me) I would write her back saying that I was seeing too many people already. I would tell the woman that even if I wasn't seeing anyone at the time. Why did I do that? I could have either (a) not respond at all (which struck me as not cool at the time--I hadn't done OLD before so I wasn't used to not replying to nice emails), (b) respond with the "not interested" button (that also seemed callous), © respond with "you're not my physical type" (seemed TMI to me in a cruel way) (d) respond with "I don't think we're a match" (which given how great the text of her profile was, was a lot like © ). See where I'm going with this? This woman was basically saying she's not interested. By writing her back as you did you came across as this annoying gadfly who has nothing better going on. irc, every time you write one of your threads, it is always about the women. Don't you ever look at YOURSELF and wonder how YOU need to change to be successful with women? I kind of dimly remember you as somewhat of a, uh, jerk, who dislikes women, but your recent post so often make sense. What happened? 2
New User Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Yeah ,but you can't buy the # 2 excuse....it doesn't hold water...because if you log on and see her "online now" all the time then you know she's not really serious about the guy. After about a week or so of seeing her "Online Now" status (in her case she's really obvious because she's an "upgraded member" on POF)...I send a follow-up email saying, "Hey, noticed you're still on here....guess things aren't working out with that guy that you told me about." Or something to that effect. Concur with those who have said she was just trying to let you down easy. If a gal has rejected a guy for any reason, it's time to move on to the next one. The most I'd ever do is peep on her profile (just once) a week or two into the future. If she initiates contact again because of that, just see where it goes. If she doesn't, forget she exists.
phineas Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 Here is a suggestion instead of coming up with creative excuses just say no or "Sorry, you are just not my type" and leave it at that. The reason most of you women still get messages is because they are from men who lack an understanding of the game. Plus it's more respectable to be real and honest instead of creatively lying to give a reason to not be interested in someone. Women are afforded the right to say No! Yep. Men need to learn that anything but a "yes" = "no" & forget the woman.
SteveC80 Posted August 16, 2013 Posted August 16, 2013 (edited) Damn you really are somebody who doesnt take to hints or signs very well and needs to be told straight up no lol If a women is cold on you and starts making exuses assuem shes not into you and just trying to put you down nicely Edited August 16, 2013 by SteveC80
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