Angry bird Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I meditated before I went to sleep. And had a very vivid dream that we were together again and again it was not perfect bliss. He was still very unattached emotionally, but we were sleeping in the same bed and I felt like I couldn't trust him. I felt very insecure, still. I prayed last night to let him go, I was ready to not think about him anymore, and then of course today I had positive thoughts. I feel like someone has hijacked my dreams. I am seriously ready to move on. Was on Ok Cupid looking at all the hot guys and couldn't wait to see someone in person. 1
steveT95 Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I'm going through a similar thing. If it wasn't for my dreams holding me back I would be in a much better mood about things. Unfortunately there is no control over our dreams.
jesse93 Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I have this problem also, at first the dreams would be about us breaking up and I woke up so sad, I felt like nothing could be worse.. but then of course a couple nights ago I had a dream that we were still together, and man when I woke up I was almost bawling I hated that dream so much. Anyway Just do your best to keep your mind off him, eventually the dreams will go away I haven't had a dream about my ex in 3 nights (thank god) I hope they don't come back anytime soon either.. They wear me down make me feel so sad.
Author Angry bird Posted August 13, 2013 Author Posted August 13, 2013 I don't feel sad. I am in the angry stage. I'm still insulted by his lack of maturity and respect. I want nothing more than to not care, or think about him anymore. I reached the point of regretting the relationship all together. But even with that said, my heart just wants to hang on to this guy and not let go. My head is ready for something new and exciting tho. I know enough to not resist what the hearts want, because what you resist persists, so I'm giving it time and compassion (like its a separate entity), but I do not want to love him anymore. I've been down this road too many times. Hoping and wanting, even if they do come back, you know that if they did it once, they will or could do it again. And who can be in a relationship where they cannot let down their guard? The one thing is, I let myself be really vulnerable and trusting with this person, and now I am paying the price. Ugh, it just suxs.
steveT95 Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I think the reaction the dream causes, or what the dream involves depends on what stage we are in. I am out of the angry side of things (finally!) and feel that I am just struggling to fill a void in my life. AngryBird, how do you treat it as a separate entity?
Author Angry bird Posted August 14, 2013 Author Posted August 14, 2013 (edited) AngryBird, how do you treat it as a separate entity? How? I try not to take the feelings personally. Like, of course after time and intimacy is spent, feelings of love will develop and then follows attachment. It's human nature. The eart will let go, little by little. I try and be patient with the heart. See, I don't think love is a cognitive thing. It happens all on its own. We choose to react to the feeling and build upon it. One thing I m beginning to realize, to see, if you will, is that love is always residing inside you waiting to be expressed or reflected and experienced. Relationships are vehicles to that. Relationships are not LOVE, just a way to express it. Hope this makes sense. Edited August 14, 2013 by Angry bird
steveT95 Posted August 14, 2013 Posted August 14, 2013 Yeah that makes sense entirely. Wow. That's why it is like a void to be filled. It is not been expressed and needs to expressed onto something. Like when I loved one dies, a lot of that love you felt for them can be displaced onto someone else. 1
reddragon588 Posted August 14, 2013 Posted August 14, 2013 I'm glad this thread is here. She has plagued my dreams the last two nights. Two nights ago I had a nightmare (she wasn't in it but it was directly related to anxiety about the next day being her birthday) and last night I had a nightlong vivid dream that we had reconciled. I really like your suggestion of meditating/praying before bed. I don't really pray but maybe I will tonight for clarity of mind.
tkp Posted August 14, 2013 Posted August 14, 2013 it quite resonates with what i am going through. She has put me on pedestal, telling me everytime how great i am and she sees her dad in me (her dad is no more) and there is an enormous guilt built up in me because of this. we connected so well sexually that she used to almost know what i am gonna next and it used to be amazing to me everytime. i feel i can never get that with anyone else. i dont know what to do.
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