steveT95 Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I have had a few good weeks, the depression was on the retreat and I was happy with life. I was living in the moment and enjoying myself whereas before I was simply bitter and looking forward to dying. This past week I have been worse again. I think it has been set off by a sequence of dreams in which me and the ex were still together and happy. In a few weeks I will be returning to college. (Not University, high school I guess, if you're american.) I will HAVE to see her. The first couple of days involve everyone sat in a big room been talked at. This is making me really anxious. She has a new boyfriend and the last time I saw her I had a massive panic attack. I want to go back to college feeling fresh and strong and make friends that she had previously alienated me from. But I associate her with college, that is how we met and we spent most of the college year together. Part of me is looking forward to college but now the slightest thought of going back is leaving me anxious and panicky. Any suggestions? The beginning of last year at college, I was so so happy, then I met her.
unexpectedlyhere Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 You have some excellent reasons to be happy to be going back to college, and you're looking forward to it, which is great! Try to work on how to deal with the panic attacks, in case they do manifest themselves - they might not! Do you have a personal tutor or someone else in a pastoral role that you can inform about this?
Author steveT95 Posted August 13, 2013 Author Posted August 13, 2013 I could tell my personal tutor, but I would rather not. When I left college in June I was an obvious wreck. I would like to go back a new person and blow everyone's mind haha! I am thinking of getting some counselling at college which I had just before the beginning of summer to help me. I haven't socialised with big groups of people for a very very long time. I am nervous around the people at college sometimes and I am sure that seeing the ex will be like a punch in the gut, again.
jesse93 Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I have GAD and i can understand where you're coming from panic attacks are horrible but just try and remember that you make it worse than it actually is my anxiety will go out of this roof sometimes but when the day comes where i have to do that thing that made me super anxious i realize that i was over thinking about it by a mile. try not to worry about her and worry about yourself keep your head high and go in there strong take deep breaths if you feel anxious and when the time comes I don't think it will be as bad as you're expecting it to be in fact it actually might end up being fun, the main thing that has helped me is taking deep breaths and I currently am prescribed xanax i never take it but sometimes i will put a pill in my pocket just so i have that security knowing if i do have a panic attack i can calm myself, I'm not sure how bad your anxiety is though so I would just try to breath deep and focus your mind on something else if possible don't feed the anxiety thats when panic attacks come. Counseling may help with this issue as well, you should look into it if you feel you could use someone to talk too.
unexpectedlyhere Posted August 13, 2013 Posted August 13, 2013 I think having someone at school that can support you without it affecting your social circle would be very helpful, so if you don't feel like telling your personal tutor I would definitely consider the counselling route.
Author steveT95 Posted August 14, 2013 Author Posted August 14, 2013 Okay, thank you guys, it's been good help hearing others experiences. I think it feels more daunting because it has been a rough day. I just need to fight my way through and stand strong!
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