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Posted (edited)

I have joint custody with my ex, but she has primary and moved back to her hometown 2 hours away and the judge has given her a geographic restriction to her home county.

 

My kids will be allowed to decide at age 12 who they want to live with, but I'm wondering if this geographic restriction will STILL apply at that time. In other words, if they decide they want to live with me at age 12, can they live with me even though I'm out of the current judge-ordered geographic restriction? (Assume that I have been a fully involved dad who never missed a single possession period and clearly has shown to take care of his kids with shining colors.)

Edited by M30USA
Posted

That's a question for your lawyer.

  • Like 2
Posted

Attorney, of course. And best treatment of the kids, possible. Giving them full enthusiastic freedom to have contact with any blood relative of their choice at any time, because you do not "own" their time. All the more reason not to get weirdes out and place restrictions on them, such as talking to their Grandma on the phone. See, that is how something like that can come back to haunt you. Cause the kids can sense it.

 

Then if any choice is up to the children when they are 12 - they will go with the "comfort zone" - the place that feels fun and free. [Now I am assuming her "home country" is outside of the US. But this theory could still apply if you are creative]. I bet America and American tradition has a lot going for it. I'd play that up - in a subtle way. Not sure what other county the choice is, but it is tough to beat the USA. I say start some of those six flags visits, or whatever kids like that are unique to our country - to make her country look boring in comparison. Just let it speak for itself. That is the counter-attack I would recommend, instead of getting spassed out.

  • Author
Posted
Attorney, of course. And best treatment of the kids, possible. Giving them full enthusiastic freedom to have contact with any blood relative of their choice at any time, because you do not "own" their time. All the more reason not to get weirdes out and place restrictions on them, such as talking to their Grandma on the phone. See, that is how something like that can come back to haunt you. Cause the kids can sense it.

 

Then if any choice is up to the children when they are 12 - they will go with the "comfort zone" - the place that feels fun and free. [Now I am assuming her "home country" is outside of the US. But this theory could still apply if you are creative]. I bet America and American tradition has a lot going for it. I'd play that up - in a subtle way. Not sure what other county the choice is, but it is tough to beat the USA. I say start some of those six flags visits, or whatever kids like that are unique to our country - to make her country look boring in comparison. Just let it speak for itself. That is the counter-attack I would recommend, instead of getting spassed out.

 

My kids repeatedly tell me how much fun they have with me. They are always being silly, making up nonsense words, and we always do enjoyable activities.

 

The only reason I ever made comments about their grandmother is that, based on my ex wife's OWN words, the grandmother acts like my kids are hers and repeatedly oversteps her role. Again, these are my ex wife's own words. And for the record my oldest child has flat out told me that his grandmother "gets mad" when I do creative things on the phone (while she has them) like make stories up. So if I seem like I'm the source of the problem, I promise you don't have the full picture and I am merely establishing healthy boundaries--a thing which I failed to do during my marriage.

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