Emma1234 Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 A recap of the break up is that it happened just over 3 months ago because he wanted to find himself. It was a 2.5 year relationship. I'm finally feeling like I don't want him at all. I know for certain that we were wrong for each other and that although I loved him deeply we weren't compatible. He put me through so much pain as well, plus a huge change occurred in him during the last 6 months of our relationship. Although it feels so liberating not to want him I can't help but occasionally slip back to almost wanting to want him which doesn't make sense. It's almost as though if I don't want him then I can see his side and the lack of feelings he has for me which hurts again. I know this means that I still love him but I am secure in knowing it's going to take longer than 3 months to fall out of love with someone. Can anyone shed any light on this? It's almost as though I don't want to accept that he has no love for anymore. Has anyone else gone through this stage? 1
anythingbut Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 Going through it right now at month 5 Em.For me, though, ther has not been one point where I have thought we were not right for each other - so in many ways you are ahead of me in the recovery process. I'm hoping for an epiphane one day where I finally realise why we weren't compatible, and why she stopped loving me so suddenly... that'll be the day where I find true acceptance.
Author Emma1234 Posted August 11, 2013 Author Posted August 11, 2013 Going through it right now at month 5 Em.For me, though, ther has not been one point where I have thought we were not right for each other - so in many ways you are ahead of me in the recovery process. I'm hoping for an epiphane one day where I finally realise why we weren't compatible, and why she stopped loving me so suddenly... that'll be the day where I find true acceptance. I think that maybe no matter how hard it may seem you have to search for it. It will probably be hard because you'll remember the good times as well but the bad times will resurface too. It just hurts to know this is how he's feeling. I don't know whether it's hurting my pride of my emotions.
Virgil876 Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 For me, I was only dumped 3 weeks ago and I'm not sad (anymore) and also don't really want my ex back... Now you're scaring me that somewhere down the track I'll get those wanting feelings again...
Author Emma1234 Posted August 11, 2013 Author Posted August 11, 2013 For me, I was only dumped 3 weeks ago and I'm not sad (anymore) and also don't really want my ex back... Now you're scaring me that somewhere down the track I'll get those wanting feelings again... Don't worry, it's different for everyone. That you're having those feelings just proves he is wrong for you which should make you feel even more secure in what's happening. It took me longer because I looked through rose tinted glasses for ages but you aren't which takes a lot of strength. I'm just wondering if anyone else feels this at some point? Maybe for me individually it's the final stage of letting go. Everyone deals with things differently so don't worry.
Virgil876 Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 Before we go too far, I am male and my ex is a female. haha I actually feel pretty good after an outing last night with a female friend, have been friends with her for a little while now. I had no thoughts of my ex for these times...
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