zoezeroseven Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 So it's been 1 year with this man who is chronically depressed, and I suspect a bit of Asperger, so I feel alone all the time. Part of it is my past, my trauma, part is his inability to connect or maintain behavior that is stable in the message that he cares for me. Every day I think my needs aren't being met, why am I still with this guy? My family doesn't like him, everyone in town knows him (with the shallow chit-chat charm he has), and we do fun athletic things today which is important to me. I had another post on here after I found his match.com pic after like 8 months, long story but not cheating per se, but everyone still said leave him. Even my grandmother says, get him out of your house. It's bringing me down and now, HERPES. Yup, he denies having it and has been dragging his feet to get tested. BTW, he says he only wants to get tested so I can't hold it against him. Now I feel like I should definitely stick it out, because who will want me now... I kinda wish I would just die and stop having to deal with relationships. I'm codependent and sick of feeling like I deserve less... I don't want to date; it's just too hard on me and I have to be stable emotionally for my job. I run, cycle, train dogs, garden, cook, love(d) sex , own my home, work on my cars, I love to smile. He brings me down and blames it on me and now I have herpes. I just want to hang my head and get hit my a truck. I know I will feel better ALONE, but I'm not sure ENOUGH. OK, now I'm ranting. Any feedback is welcome even if you want to tell me how disgusting and un-datable I am, since I feel like that anyway; keep it real (expect for my thoughts which seem more and more ungrounded). Thanks so much for your thoughts in advance.
JDPT Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 I think you have mentioned a substantial amount of valid reason as to why you shouldn't be with him, take a look at your post again. We often tend to listen to our hearts rather than logic. You have a lot going for yourself, don't let anyone bring you down, even if it's the one you love. With regards to herpes, its unfortunate that you got it but it's now reality, as harsh as this may sound you now have to learn to live with it and you should not in any way feel "disgusting and un-datable." Focus on you and the decision you will like to make with regards to this relationship, if it helps make a list pros and cons and history of how your relationship has unfolded as yet. You will come to the conclusion and will take best course of action. There are certain times in life when you have to do what's best for you and you only, and clearly this is one of them.
Recommended Posts