napy666 Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 Do you think a guy would want to be with me if I never found a job or a car? But had other qualities like cleaning the house, knowing how to save money, laundry, etc.
clia Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 My suspicion is that most guys in their 20s expect their able bodied girlfriend to have a job and be able to drive a car. (I'm assuming there is nothing physical or mental that will prevent you from working or driving.). When you see couples your age where one doesn't have a job, it is typically because that person is at home raising children. But, you've expressed that you don't want children, so I guess you just plan to sit around the house all day while he's at work? And worse, without a driver's license you can't even run household errands while he's at work, so I guess he will have to do all of that also when he gets home, in addition to providing 100% financial support to you. I'm not going to say there is no man out there who wouldn't be okay with this arrangement, but I do think you are going to have a very hard time finding him. You seem to be looking for a parent rather than a partner. If you are so great at cleaning house and doing laundry, surely you can find a job as a maid somewhere. That might be a good place to start on your job hunt.
Balzac Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 I think the car thing depends if one lives in a large urban area. My cost for parking in my own building garage approaches $500/mo. Unless you can easily afford the expense-Zip Car, taxi, rental car can be easily funded out of that same $500. Many people can drive but have little need to. No job but volunteer in a significant way and have adequate financial means to survive, no problem.
nescafe1982 Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 Depends. Can you support yourself financially without either a job or a car? 3
Red Wolverine Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 Do you think a guy would want to be with me if I never found a job or a car? But had other qualities like cleaning the house, knowing how to save money, laundry, etc. Those are good qualities for a maid, not a partner. 3
Carenth Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 In this day and age you will probably have a hard time. I can understand unemployment and such I've been there myself. If my partner however had no intention of ever finding work (anything) and were able bodied then I would probably break up with them as I would feel used. 2
Keenly Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 I would never, ever, ever date a woman that didn't and never has had a job. It screams lazynes and mooching bum. The car thing is location depending, and where I live, s car is a huge plus. I have had both a job and a car since I was 16, its really not that hard. My future gf will be on an equal level with me. 1
New User Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 Do you think a guy would want to be with me if I never found a job or a car? But had other qualities like cleaning the house, knowing how to save money, laundry, etc. I think that you're about fifty years too late for that kind of arrangement to be at all likely. Sure, there are guys out there that want a housewife, but I think that they're few and far between these days. I can only think of one arrangement like this in my peer group- but she does drive. I'm in my 40s and in the midwest- it's uncommon here. I'm guessing that it's even less common in younger demographics and in most other parts of the country.
hoping2heal Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 Do you think a guy would want to be with me if I never found a job or a car? But had other qualities like cleaning the house, knowing how to save money, laundry, etc. How can you save money if you don't have a job to be making any money? Knowing how to do it in theory is one thing, putting it into practice is much more difficult for many people. More often than not families are needing both parents to work. There may be some men who have a value system where gender roles assign women to the home and children, and men to the workforce.
gaius Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 There are plenty of guys who find it sexy to be the provider in a relationship and have you be dependent on them. Not sure it would be the healthiest dynamic though, since you wouldn't be able to leave or do much if they decided to cheat or anything else went wrong with the relationship. 1
Socks At Play Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 No car doesn't bother me, but in a relationship I would expect to be with somebody who desired to find and hold at least part time work to help out with the bills.
MissBee Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 Do you think a guy would want to be with me if I never found a job or a car? But had other qualities like cleaning the house, knowing how to save money, laundry, etc. Depends on the guy. The simple fact is: there is someone who likes you or doesn't mind, whoever and however you are. There are men out there who are very traditional and desire their wives/gfs to be homemakers and thus have no issue with a woman who will tend to the home, who doesn't want to be employed outside of it or who doesn't have a car. There are women who date men with no car and no job, who play video games all day, even though for men being so unproductive is even more frowned upon...but they find some woman to take them in under her roof and support and love them. So as a woman, I'm sure there are men who will overlook it if they like you and feel you contribute in other ways. Do you not want a job or car ever or are you simply saying you can't find one right now and are thus worried how this will be viewed in dating? 1
thefooloftheyear Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 "Aint nothing going on, but the rent...you gotta have a J-O-B..if you want to be with me"... TFY 1
smile1983 Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 I think that you're about fifty years too late for that kind of arrangement to be at all likely. Sure, there are guys out there that want a housewife, but I think that they're few and far between these days. I can only think of one arrangement like this in my peer group- but she does drive. I'm in my 40s and in the midwest- it's uncommon here. I'm guessing that it's even less common in younger demographics and in most other parts of the country. Maybe OP should meet my ex, that's what he wanted
Author napy666 Posted August 11, 2013 Author Posted August 11, 2013 My parents have given me money and I save it and I do have money saved in my Google Adsense account which is saving up there. And I have been trying to find a job and getting my driver's license just keep failing at both so I figured I will prob. be at this state when I turn 30 HA
pink_sugar Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 Do you think a guy would want to be with me if I never found a job or a car? But had other qualities like cleaning the house, knowing how to save money, laundry, etc. From my experience, plenty of men will date women who don't drive, but there is a double standard to an extent. Most women would not date a man without a job or car. However as the cost of living rises and more and more people are living on dual incomes, society's standards have changed.
TaraMaiden Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 The economy has reached a stage where salaries are not commensurate with the cost of living. The CoL has risen sharply, whereas salaries of the mid-stream earners have remained relatively stable, and have not risen to match inflation. Your £/$ buys a lot less now than it used to 6 years ago.... So if you want to find a guy who will be happy to support you, no holds barred, he will have to be already considerably wealthy, and be happy to dispense with his paid housekeeper, as you will be doing all her work from now on. As well as 'servicing him' in the bedroom. 3
aspiringuitarheroine Posted August 11, 2013 Posted August 11, 2013 A job is kinda important. With a job, if you are savvy, comes some serious financial freedom. And there is no excuse for a woman to not be financially independent, with her own savings and future taken care of. As for a car, I don't drive and don't own a car. It's very expensive and my city has excellent public transport. I accept a lift if it's offered, but I never ask. I will probably learn to drive one day but right now, it's unnecessary. 1
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