In Purgatory Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 Okay, so after making a thread on here the other day that involved some reflection into a past relationship, it made me think about a particular instance from that past relationship that has just never sat right with me. Now, this happened over five years ago so I am not angry or anything, I am simply offering it up as a cautionary tale and perhaps for a bit of humor. I had this girlfriend that I was just never really all that attracted to. At this early stage in our relationship, we were having sex somewhat regularly but not nearly enough and she suspected me of cheating on her. She often would go through my phone and email accounts looking for proof that I was cheating on her. She would stalk my ex girlfriends online and always feared I was still involved with them. This girl and myself were living together at this point. One day, the two of us were laying in bed watching TV when I decided to take a shower. I took my phone with me and went to the bathroom. A minute after I closed the door, I get a text from an ex girlfriend that I hadn't spoken with in a couple years. She was very flirty and after a few texts revealed to me that the reason she suddenly texted me is because she had a sex dream about us the night before. Now, I know she lives in another state and I figured there was no harm in flirting back and letting her know I was flattered. That's about as far as the conversation went before I jumped in the shower. The next morning, my girlfriend texted me from work and asked me who Nikki was, which is the name of the girl I was texting in the bathroom the night before. I told her it was just an old friend... which was kind of true because although we dated in high school we remained friends for a couple years after splitting up. So my girlfriend says "Oh. Well that's weird because you kept saying her name in your sleep last night." Alright, she had me. I was really embarrassed and apologized to her and let her know our entire history so I could convince her there was nothing going on. Now, I never thought twice about that incident until recently. But maybe you are already piecing this together as I write this. What must have really happened is my girlfriend changed Nikki's number in my phone to her own(because who knows anyones number anymore? We type it in once then just look at the persons name in our contacts) and the whole the time I was talking to "Nikki" it was really my girlfriend trying to figure out who this Nikki girl in my phone was to me. I guess she didn't get the information she wanted so the next day she made up that lie about me saying her name in my sleep. Because I had no recollection of dreaming about Nikki that night and I don't have a habit of talking in my sleep. I was an immature guy(only 23) and should have cut this girl loose when I knew the physical attraction was gone but man this just seems like psychotic behavior to me. However, if I can write my behavior in the relationship off as immature then I guess she deserves the same, seeing as she was only 20. Anyone else experience a snooping story that crossed the line?
acrosstheuniverse Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 Thankfully no, a guy has never snooped on me that I've been aware of. If I caught or found a partner of mine going through my facebook or phone they wouldn't be my partner for very much longer. It indicates a complete and utter lack of trust. If they felt they had genuine reason to be concerned about something and asked me to show them my texts or facebook on the other hand, I'd sit and show them whatever they needed to see. If they did it behind my back it would be a different matter.
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