ANewBeginning Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 I have a very warm and charismatic personality that instantly makes people comfortable. As such, everyone particularly girls always warm up to me (it's a bad habit sometimes as I'm too open). I'm a few months into my new job and at the start everyone introduced themselves etc etc and we're like one big family. I know I flirt with the girls a bit but it's just your typical casual summer job while we're all studying/ on holidays. Most of them are in relationships already so we know it is just for fun. There is an exception though. Recently we got a new girl come in and first off she didn't introduce herself nothing. She's very work focus'ed. So I teased her a bit but she seems 'aloof'. Slowly though she is seeming to open up but how I interact with her is so different to how I am with all the other girls. E.g. if I tease her, she will bite back. Jokingly complimented her and got a giggle. Totally ignores me half the time at work even if we brush past each other (with the other girls, they'll poke fun or make a comment). Saying good byes after work she almost doesn't even acknowledges me. I rarely catch eye contact. I feel there's almost a bit of tension between us but I cannot make out what I'm doing wrong. She is basically the first person that has not warmed up to me hence it's bugging me that much! So what do you guys think? *** If you guys want to comment about work ethic etc and how it's the workplace, we all are actually hard workers. We get the job done but at the same time have a bit of fun. Think back to when you guys had uni jobs!!!
Philosoraptor Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 Are you approaching her as a dating prospect or as a friend? She and you may just have personalities that don't match, or she has other things on her mind, therefore doesn't want to take the time to play around with you at times. 1
Author ANewBeginning Posted August 8, 2013 Author Posted August 8, 2013 I understand mate. Problem is I always am attracted to those aloof, shy quiet girls. Hence starts the long journey of me trying to get to know her better, pushing through that many barriers and then giving up right at that moment when she starts falling for me because I've given up. Anyone have tips for me? Maybe patience is the key?
Mr.Mango Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 You sound like someone who puts a lot of attention into getting people to like you. The problem with that is that you can never have everyone like you. In some cases it might turn certain people off. The best way to get people to like you is by being yourself and letting them make the decision themselves. Which would be my advice when dealing with this girl. If you want to pursue her romantically then you'll automatically be interacting differently, so don't compare that to your interactions with the other girls. Test the waters, flirt a bit and see what happens. Maybe she likes you, maybe she could care less, who knows. Believe me, most girls will let you know relatively quickly what they think.
spiderowl Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 Forgive me, but I suspect you just see her as a challenge because she's not flirty with you like the other girls. She might be a more serious character or quite shy, who knows? I don't think you should pursue her unless you are genuinely interested and not just seeking to 'conquer' a challenge. There's no point messing her around just to prove to yourself that you've still 'got it'. Think carefully about your intentions before acting. 2
Emilia Posted August 10, 2013 Posted August 10, 2013 So what do you guys think? *** If you guys want to comment about work ethic etc and how it's the workplace, we all are actually hard workers. We get the job done but at the same time have a bit of fun. Think back to when you guys had uni jobs!!! It's possible that she likes you but she doesn't want to be like other girls. I watch men I fancy and if I see them as lapping up attention too much it makes me withdraw. I know that sometimes creates interest on his part - which is probably not a healthy dynamic but I naturally dislike joining the gaggle of girls to compete for attention.
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