Emma1234 Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 Hey everyone. You may know my story from me other posts, my ex left to 'find himself' after a 2.5 relationship. I will be honest and admit I've had a few tricky days and I stupidly looked through a few old photos. By doing this I realised he hadn't deleted them off the social networking site, merely hidden them but as I was tagged I could see. My brain decided to then give me a twinge of hope which was the worst thing it could have done. I had a few bad days and I've realised now that hope is the catalyst that prevents me from getting over him. It also pulls me back into that blackness. Although I will never allow myself to feel that awful depressed way again I did feel myself slipping backwards. I panicked thinking that I had no choice in this depleting of my progress but I sat down and took some time to myself. First I realised that him not deleting the pictures does not suggest even an ounce of hope. It is ridiculous desperate thinking and it is also something that I shouldn't have wasted my time thinking about. He has gone, it's that simple. He left me for selfish reasons, no matter how much he loved me in the past he chose flight over fight for me. No one is worth crying over if they leave you! It doesn't make me 'better' than him that I wanted to work it out as I admit we both made mistakes during the relationship (arguments) but people learn from mistakes and sadly he didn't allow himself the chance to learn and ultimately grow with me. He just left. I have learnt though, I've gone through something I didn't know existed and it has shown me that there is a whole new perception to life. He is not coming back. Even if he did, although I know things can be worked out in some cases, I know know that he would choose flight. He has betrayed my trust and therefore I have to let him go. I just have to slip back into the frame of mind that has been carrying me along for a while but at least I can honestly say that although I had a slight set back I know that that was all it was. Time time time! We'll all be fine. If you have a set back push forward! Don't let it consume you, I know it's so so hard, but it's not forever. I just thought I'd share in case anyone felt like they were going backwards.
Knoxpwns Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 I've realised now that hope is the catalyst that prevents me from getting over him. Hi Emma I couldn't agree with the quoted sentence more. At least, hope in the sense of things working out between us and our exes. Hope for my own future prevents me from thinking about her You have a really strong grasp on how your relationship went down, and that's good to see you kinda have figured a lot of it out. As far as the picture goes, if he couldn't put the time and effort into keeping his awesome girlfriend, then I'm not really surprised he can't be bothered to just remove the pictures. I'm glad you're moving forward and happier on the way. I myself feel a bit better with each day that passes 1
Virgil876 Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 Really glad you have got through these bad stages, as for me, it's only been 2 weeks but I seem to be doing ok, I still visit these forums (which probably means I'm not ok... haha) but I'm not that upset, although I'm sure there will be a sad episode some time down the track.
Knoxpwns Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 Really glad you have got through these bad stages, as for me, it's only been 2 weeks but I seem to be doing ok, I still visit these forums (which probably means I'm not ok... haha) but I'm not that upset, although I'm sure there will be a sad episode some time down the track. Honestly I feel the same. its been 2 or 3 weeks and I am starting to feel better, but I still visit the forums. I visit because I want to help other people in the same way the people here helped me. Pay it forward, you know?
Author Emma1234 Posted August 8, 2013 Author Posted August 8, 2013 I still visit as well just because sometimes it helps to re read posts and realise how far I've come. It's a strange experience isn't it.
Virgil876 Posted August 8, 2013 Posted August 8, 2013 Honestly I feel the same. its been 2 or 3 weeks and I am starting to feel better, but I still visit the forums. I visit because I want to help other people in the same way the people here helped me. Pay it forward, you know? Yeah, definitely, and to acknowledge on why I was dumped, just more understanding of it all, knowing that it is not an isolated incident. Also to learn and to know I have no hatred towards my ex-girlfriend no matter the confusion and sadness her actions caused.
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