Jump to content

Ex-wife keeps my last name and writes it at bottom of emails?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

My ex is obviously keeping my last name, probably due to our children. But I'm confused about why she started signing some of her emails with her full legal name. Isn't that almost like implying that I own her? I don't understand. I guess she might be doing it because she wants to keep all emails as evidence? But you don't need to sign emails since it's known who sent every one. What are your opinions on this? If she were trying to be spiteful, I would think she'd change her last name and then wave it in my face like she's doing. She typically writes her full name in emails where she is being difficult and spiteful. Then again, she always did get satisfaction out of keeping people confused and disoriented, so maybe that's what her goal is.

Edited by M30USA
Posted
My ex is obviously keeping my last name, probably due to our children. But I'm confused about why she started signing some of her emails with her full legal name. Isn't that almost like implying that I own her? I don't understand. I guess she might be doing it because she wants to keep all emails as evidence? But you don't need to sign emails since it's known who sent every one. What are your opinions on this? If she were trying to be spiteful, I would think she'd change her last name and then wave it in my face like she's doing. She typically writes her full name in emails where she is being difficult and spiteful. Then again, she always did get satisfaction out of keeping people confused and disoriented, so maybe that's what her goal is.

 

I sign all emails at the bottom with my full name unless it is a friend. I don't usually email friends though, so its rare. My full name is in my email, but I still finish any and every email with it. I dont know your ex so maybe she is being malicious. I would just ignore it.

  • Author
Posted
I have an automatic signature set that goes with every email I send, and it has my whole name.

 

What is the issue with a person signing their emails with their whole name, anyway? It's normal.

 

She signs her first name only unless she's being spiteful and terse--then it's her full name.

Posted

My Ph.D. and extensive publication record in in my married name of 28 years. It is a problem. My life work is not known by my maiden name. If I were to change my name, I would use my Grandfather's name - not my family name. I do not wish to associate myself with my family (which is almost non-existant at this point).

 

You know something? You are making something out of nothing again. Plain and simple. I am almost a year out from the divorce - I am barely on my feet. And I don't even have a kid in the picture.

 

And look at you. Last week you were ranting about Grandma talking to the kids. Now, you are bent outta shape over the signature on an email for Christ's sake. Man, I think you net to GAL. I hop you know what that stands for. Stop worrying about what this and that means. You don't even have a Ph.D. What's wrong with you? You are acting like an over-educated neurotic person - over analyzing every GD thing that comes your way. And your hypothesis is always totally skewed! If you want to analyze data, you have to sellect a balanced methodology. Maybe you need to apply to graduate school - that would keep you busy with something constructive.

Posted

She can only irritate you with this signature if you allow her to do so. In the future see her signature First Middle Last and then mentally add your own moniker in parenthesis, ex Mary Jane Smith (Queen of the cold hearted Biotches). This will bring a smile to your face, instead of frustration.

Posted

Initially, I kept my first husband's last name so my daughter wouldn't feel so alone since her father never saw her 8 years. I think it bothered my first ex-H's new wife more than it did him or me....never understood why since she met him years after he and I split up, so I had no quarrels with her, until she thought it gave her a sense of entitlement over me being the Mom.

 

I keep my second husband's last name for a variety of reasons, I use it as part of my stage name for band performances, it's a PITA to change it again, and for spite (not to him as much as to his AP who he married).

 

Case in point when it came in handy, when our son had to have brain surgery due to a skateboarding accident. Riding up in the elevator with exH, new wife, surgeons and our son, the surgeons wanted to know who the "wife" was since there were two Ms. H's in the elevator....I simply stated "she would be the wife, I am the mother". It incensed her even more when the head surgeon came out and asked for Mr. and Ms. H....she started to stand up and then sat back down, right where she belongs I might add.

 

This really all came to light the next day after the surgery when she put my exH out in front of the hospital because he called me crying and wanting to stay with his son in ICU (which I didn't have a problem with but she did). She obviously read him the riot act because I refused (and still refuse) to change my last name.

 

Well, it may be spite or extreme satisfaction now on my part, but men typically don't have issues as their children keep their sir name in a divorce. In most cases, women want to keep the last name to easily identify to their children and has absolutely nothing to do with the man they were married to. Today, with daycares and schools, it makes it much easier on a divorced woman to have their child's last name rather than have to prove that they are the child's mother due to a different last name. Some women carry the sir name as a hyphenated name upon remarriage for this simple reason. In most cases, it has nothing to do with the husband as much as it has to do with the kids.

 

Me? Well, I just get extreme satisfaction in knowing it causes the new wive's a meltdown when they get my throw-backs, because that sir name is not a sense of entitlement when it comes to my children, nor does it give them the right to replace me as Mom. ;) (Those meltdowns are more a reflection of them.)

  • Like 1
Posted

While is may be your last name it is also hers..marriage or not... she is the mother of your kids so she kept it, no biggie and it gives continuity to your children.

 

The signing of the full legal name sounds like a signature profile she set up or she is just changing things up, many time I edit the text the signature throws up to either edit out my company info or remove my last name if the email is of the personal nature and many times I just hit send...

Posted

Wow, it doesn't take much to push your buttons!

  • Like 1
×
×
  • Create New...