It-is-what-it-is. Posted August 7, 2013 Posted August 7, 2013 Okay, I will delete him off the social networking sights, is this it for me and him? Don't understand your question
It-is-what-it-is. Posted August 7, 2013 Posted August 7, 2013 is it over for good Yes, it is. His actions are not loving. Would you WANT him back?...
Author Louise0203 Posted August 7, 2013 Author Posted August 7, 2013 I would not want him back, and I would not take him back because he would do it again, but I want the relationship back.
It-is-what-it-is. Posted August 7, 2013 Posted August 7, 2013 I would not want him back, and I would not take him back because he would do it again, but I want the relationship back. You want a relationship? Or you want a friendship with him? Not sure what you mean.
Author Louise0203 Posted August 7, 2013 Author Posted August 7, 2013 I want the relationship I had with him back, because he was a good boyfriend, but I would never want it with him because of the way he has treated me, and he really does not deserve my friendship wether I wanted it or not. 1
BigGirlPantiesOn Posted August 7, 2013 Posted August 7, 2013 You want the "feeling" the relationship gave to you when it was good. But you don't want him? You're reliving a ghost relationship. Identify that your thinking is distorted from the pain of manipulation. He is succeeded in brain washing you. Know this...feel this. And let go... or be dragged.
TaraMaiden Posted August 7, 2013 Posted August 7, 2013 No, you don't want him OR the relationship, because the relationship will bring you right back to this point. he's manipulated and 'brainwashed' you. It's not him you want. You want to be loved, cared for and 'nurtured' by someone who will always put you first. This is destructive and degrading. Be very sure of this: It is over. Cut him off in every way possible (have you actually read the 'No Contact Guide' in my signature? Did you know some people actually print it off and carry it with them, at all times? You may like to copy, paste and do the same.....) 1
Author Louise0203 Posted August 9, 2013 Author Posted August 9, 2013 really really missing him, need some motivation!
TaraMaiden Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 For what? how motivated do you need to be to stay away from someone who is toxic and uses you for his own ego? Jeesh, I'd be thrilled to know that staying away form this is so much less painful than connecting with it. If you think you feel 'pain' now, you have no idea how much worse you'll feel if you give in to the temptation of contacting him. You think this is painful? Not even close....
Author Louise0203 Posted August 9, 2013 Author Posted August 9, 2013 it is hard to hate a child, and maturity wise, that is what he is. He is being horrid, but he doesn't know he is, which makes it hard.
TaraMaiden Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 That's not your problem to resolve or 'kiss better'. He's the one with the problem. You have to walk away from it, because you can't fix it, and it's not your 'job' to do so.
Author Louise0203 Posted August 9, 2013 Author Posted August 9, 2013 he does't know he has the problem, and thats why it frustrates me, he thinks we broke up because of the arguing and its not because of that, we broke up because he needs to work on things in his life, i dont understand why i have realised my faults and he hasnt realised his
TaraMaiden Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 he does't know he has the problem, and thats why it frustrates me, Well, that's not your call. YOU perceive it as a problem...but he doesn't necessarily.... he thinks we broke up because of the arguing and its not because of that, we broke up because he needs to work on things in his life, Says you.... You cannot dictate what people should or shouldn't do, no matter how much work you believe they need to do. It's not your call. i dont understand why i have realised my faults and he hasnt realised his because even if you point them out to him in black and white, he may not see them as you do, and there's not a blind thing you can do to change his viewpoint. YOU may see them as 'faults'. He may see them as 'characteristics' and why should he change them just to make you happy? If he deems it necessary to change, it would be to make HIMSELF happy. It would have to be for him, not for your benefit. You're not entitled to demand or expect that from him. At All.
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