The logical side vs. feelings...which wins in the end?

[Col1]

Have you ever entered into a dating relationship you knew had some obstacles but the attraction between you two was so strong? A grey area of "This is awesome!" mixed with "What the heck am I doing? This will never work!" But you ignored logic and just went with your feelings. How did it turn out?

Edited August 6, 2013 by Col1

[MrCastle]

Feelings wins out for me in the end. And almost never works out.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Have you ever entered into a dating relationship you knew had some obstacles but the attraction between you two was so strong? A grey area of "This is awesome!" mixed with "What the heck am I doing? This will never work!" But you ignored logic and just went with your feelings. How did it turn out?

 

Feelings. It always ended in disaster

[lop98]

Yes. I went for feelings and the result was hell...

[TaraMaiden]

Feelings made me marry entirely the wrong person as my 1st Husband.

My second marriage lasted so much longer than it really should have, because of head- rather than heart-logic.

 

it's amazing how being bitten on the arse can make you change your perspective.

I tend to be far more logical and thought-driven now.

 

The 'downside' is that this has served to lessen my 'romantic' side.

But that is an ephemeral essence anyway, so frankly, I feel as if I've gained more than I've lost.

 

maybe that's what makes me so "hard-ass" 'tell-it-like-it-is' on here.

 

And it's a fact that I - and others like me - have been proven right in our smack-in-the-mouth advice!!

[Eternal Sunshine]

Following my head has never failed me. Following my heart made me make mistakes of gigantic proportions - and suffer the consequences.

 

Follow your heart may be one of the worst advice ever given.

[soccerrprp]

Follow your heart may be one of the worst advice ever given.

 

And yet, there are many who would disagree.

 

I must admit that the heart wins out more often than not. Love is an irrational beast and even the most logical of us are victim to it.

[Revolver]

Sexual attraction and emotions will ALWAYS override logic. Especially when it comes to younger people

[Eternal Sunshine]

Sexual attraction and emotions will ALWAYS override logic. Especially when it comes to younger people

 

I guess that's why I like younger guys. Older men tend to learn how to control their emotions/passions better and that's a turn off. I am not into very logical men.

 

Younger men tend to be more open and expressive 'bout their passions and emotions. That's hot

[Col1]

I'm involved with a new lady where I feel exactly like this. Instant connection and chemistry for both of us. She is an emotional person; not one to look at the logic. I am a very logical person. I tend to overthink. This time, however, I am going with my feelings.

 

She's a good person (employed, single, friends, emotionally healthy) so no obvious dealbreakers. She teases about things I enjoy, like: world cultures, book discussions, museums, classical music. Instead she watches reality tv and lives an admitted American "redneck" lifestyle (motorcycling, hunting, fishing, tattoos, country music, drinking lots of beer - responsibly at home). We're Ying-Yang.

 

My feelings say she is AMAZING. However, "logic" has me worried that our differences of interests will get on each others' nerves after the novelty wears off.

[Maleficent]

Well I will go with the family and say feelings + disaster as well.

 

[Col1]

I'm involved with a new lady where I feel exactly like this. Instant connection and chemistry for both of us. She is an emotional person; not one to look at the logic. I am a very logical person. I tend to overthink. This time, however, I am going with my feelings.

 

She's a good person (employed, single, friends, emotionally healthy) so no obvious dealbreakers. She teases about things I enjoy, like: world cultures, book discussions, museums, classical music. Instead she watches reality tv and lives an admitted American "redneck" lifestyle (motorcycling, hunting, fishing, tattoos, country music, drinking lots of beer - responsibly at home). We're Ying-Yang.

 

My feelings say she is AMAZING. However, "logic" has me worried that our differences of interests will get on each others' nerves after the novelty wears off.

Is there a chance for two people from different worlds? (see my situation in Post #13 quoted above). We are just dating now; not exclusive yet. If both people are committed to work on the relationship, does that help? Or is "work" on a relationship a signal to find someone else more compatible in lifestyle from the get-go?

 

I could watch some reality tv and discuss it with her. I doubt she would read a book simulataneously so we could talk about it. Wouldn't bother me. I could always join a book club at the public library or do online forums about it.

 

I won't try to change her. She'd have to initiate interest in one of my activities; otherwise I wouldn't even hint at it. Meanwhile I'd learn how to shoot at a firing range (I've never shot a weapon before in my life) and how to ride a motorcycle (she only rides in back anyway).

 

Would adopting her interests kill her attraction? Make me into a submissive guy she no longer respects?

Edited August 6, 2013 by Col1

[MercuryMorrison1]

Logic for me...Always logic.

 

Anytime I've ever let my feelings decide how I handle something emotional, like a relationship things tend to go awry really quick.

[paigej91]

Have you ever entered into a dating relationship you knew had some obstacles but the attraction between you two was so strong? A grey area of "This is awesome!" mixed with "What the heck am I doing? This will never work!" But you ignored logic and just went with your feelings. How did it turn out?

 

Unlike most, I went with logic and I can't say I'm happy I didn't try, but I don't regret it either.

 

Relationships have to be both logical and emotional for me.

[Weezy1973]

I'm involved with a new lady where I feel exactly like this. Instant connection and chemistry for both of us. She is an emotional person; not one to look at the logic. I am a very logical person. I tend to overthink. This time, however, I am going with my feelings.

 

She's a good person (employed, single, friends, emotionally healthy) so no obvious dealbreakers. She teases about things I enjoy, like: world cultures, book discussions, museums, classical music. Instead she watches reality tv and lives an admitted American "redneck" lifestyle (motorcycling, hunting, fishing, tattoos, country music, drinking lots of beer - responsibly at home). We're Ying-Yang.

 

My feelings say she is AMAZING. However, "logic" has me worried that our differences of interests will get on each others' nerves after the novelty wears off.

 

Generally similarities bode much better for relationships than differences. What you are feeling is intense attraction / chemistry. You will probably try to find reasons to make this relationship work because of those intense feelings.

 

I will also say this - people can have immensely different interests and still have a great relationship. The key is that they have similar values. Usually this is based on similar upbringings which, more times than not, will result in similar interests, but not necessarily.

[Simon Phoenix]

The heart is a moron. Yet it's a persuasive moron at times. I go by logic, but sometimes it's a battle.

[miss_jaclynrae]

The only time I followed my feelings when logic told me it was stupid...

It was a disaster.

 

 

That doesn't usually happen though, rarely ever have I actually been in a situation where logically we shouldn't have been together.