PogoStick Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 Reminds me of a girlfriend who was disappointed when I called her cute because she wanted to be called beautiful or pretty. Sometimes a guy can't win. 1
Lei Ping Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 Guys, how do you react when your gf sends you naughty pictures? Girls, how does your bf react? My boyfriend doesn't say much. He will usually say something like "I like it :)" or "That's hot :)" but I always feel really disappointed by that. I mean, I expect a bigger reaction when I'm sending a topless or nude picture. Not that I think I look 100% perfect or anything like that, but I have a nice figure and I think a lot of guys would find it attractive. So I feel like my boyfriend should feel lucky to get these pictures and should show me that he really appreciates and enjoys them. Guys I've dated in the past would say "OH MY GOD you look amazing. I'm so turned on. You are gorgeous. I wish I was with you right now." stuff like that. In the moment when we are hooking up, my boyfriend tells me he loves my body. I also know that he watches porn. So why doesn't he say much when I send him pictures? I feel like I am baring a lot there, and then I don't feel that I get much in return. It is almost embarrassing. Am I overreacting? Do you think he really DOES feel that way and just doesn't voice it? We've talked before about my need for him to voice what he's feeling because I am very big on verbal communication and words of affection and affirmation. He knows this. Sooner or later the relationship will end (98% chance of that happening) and he will have a file full of "naughty" pictures of you. Let's hope that he's not the type of Guy to post those "naughty pix" up on some public site or share them with your new Fiance or Hubby or maybe your Parents or coworkers. Sheesh! 2
bubbaganoosh Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 I got a question and remember that I'm 65 so take that into consideration. Ladies. What do your OLD BOYFRIENDS do with the naked pictures you sent them? Is he sharing them with other guys? Posting them on line? Aren't you worried that these pictures can come back and haunt you in the future. You get married and your husband just happens to see some guy at a bar showing his friends a picture of his now wife naked? Just wondering. I mean I would think that you would not want to take a picture of yourself that you wouldn't want anyone else to see. I don't know. Maybe I'm old. Wait. I am old. I forgot.
Babolat Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 This is my thinking too! AND I like pics of my gf in R-rated, not X. Agreed, I have never had a gf send me naughty pics, and personally I am not sure how I feel about it. OP, I would not compare reactions to past bfs and also ask your self "Why do I NEED a certain reaction?" Validation, attention..... 3
fiftyofsomethin Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 I mean, or we could just ignore what I said earlier and NOT treat the root of the problem. Let's keep talking about the immediate problem and not get anywhere, shall we?
Babolat Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 I mean, or we could just ignore what I said earlier and NOT treat the root of the problem. Let's keep talking about the immediate problem and not get anywhere, shall we? I missed your earlier post, well said, I agree. 1
New User Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 I got a question and remember that I'm 65 so take that into consideration. Ladies. What do your OLD BOYFRIENDS do with the naked pictures you sent them? Is he sharing them with other guys? Posting them on line? Aren't you worried that these pictures can come back and haunt you in the future. You get married and your husband just happens to see some guy at a bar showing his friends a picture of his now wife naked? Just wondering. I mean I would think that you would not want to take a picture of yourself that you wouldn't want anyone else to see. I don't know. Maybe I'm old. Wait. I am old. I forgot. There's always going to be some guys that do these things, but I don't really think it's likely in most cases. The pics I have of my exes are securely stored and I rarely look at them. Though one of them was blown up and framed over the fireplace in the living room while we were married. I have no idea what she has done with the pictures of me- fully tumescent in front of a mirror with her kneeling next to me, or the video of us complete with a money shot that we took. Nor do I care. I'm not ashamed of them and I can't really imagine imagine anyone's life being so empty that they would feel the need to think less of me for taking part in rather benign expressions of desire with a woman I was in love with at the time. It simply isn't that big of a deal- not unless you're a celebrity and you can get publicity off your naughty bits. People tend to overstate the impact of things that are really unimportant. Even if I were a jerk and posted the pics of my ex online- I think that the only likely outcome would be a slight increase in carpal tunnel cases. She was (and is, I'm sure) a very beautiful woman. 2
Star Gazer Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 OP, I would not compare reactions to past bfs and also ask your self "Why do I NEED a certain reaction?" Validation, attention..... Haven't really read any responses other than this one, and I have to agree. Why have you been sending naughty pictures to multiple boyfriends? That's something that seems kinda "special" and not something that should be shared with everyone you date. It seems like you're doing it to get a particular reaction, not to make him happy. The only person I've ever sent such pictures to was Soldier Boy while he was deployed and upon request. 3
Phoe Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 I can totally understand why you are disappointed that his (maybe not all of them) comments are critical and why you dropped the habit, but not that you should interpret it as being unattractive. Here is a guy that wants to see pics of you but not just nudies (I thought a lot of women would see this as a positive, as he sees you as more than a sex object). Also the fact that the pics are dark and or blurry means he can't appreciate your body as much as if they weren't. sadly you're giving him way too much benefit of the doubt lol. If I sent him nude, he'd want one not nude. If I sent one in lingerie he'd be disappointed it wasn't nude. If I was wearing black lingerie he'd say he likes my pink set better. Literally no matter what I sent it wasn't good enough or up to his standards. "Why is your hair up? Are you wearing makeup? Can you get a better angle? Too bad your tits are in that pic, it would be cute otherwise" This same guy reached a point in the last 2 months I was with him where he would not have sex with me if I did not have on full lingerie/costume with fishnet stocking and high heels. If I was just naked he'd grumble and whine about how it's not as fun for him if I don't get fully dolled up every time. I couldn't take it anymore. Being made to feel like sex with me while I'm just fully naked is undesirable. I wasn't good enough unless I was in a nurse outfit, or a schoolgirl outfit, thigh high boots or high heels. 1
New User Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 sadly you're giving him way too much benefit of the doubt lol. If I sent him nude, he'd want one not nude. If I sent one in lingerie he'd be disappointed it wasn't nude. If I was wearing black lingerie he'd say he likes my pink set better. Literally no matter what I sent it wasn't good enough or up to his standards. "Why is your hair up? Are you wearing makeup? Can you get a better angle? Too bad your tits are in that pic, it would be cute otherwise" This same guy reached a point in the last 2 months I was with him where he would not have sex with me if I did not have on full lingerie/costume with fishnet stocking and high heels. If I was just naked he'd grumble and whine about how it's not as fun for him if I don't get fully dolled up every time. I couldn't take it anymore. Being made to feel like sex with me while I'm just fully naked is undesirable. I wasn't good enough unless I was in a nurse outfit, or a schoolgirl outfit, thigh high boots or high heels. Jeez. That sounds like classic porn induced desensitization. The accoutrements can be fun- but they are a far cry from necessary. I just don't understand how anyone can get to the point where they feel that's a must have. Kinda sad and FWIW I'm glad that you're no longer in that situation. 1
Phoe Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 Jeez. That sounds like classic porn induced desensitization. The accoutrements can be fun- but they are a far cry from necessary. I just don't understand how anyone can get to the point where they feel that's a must have. Kinda sad and FWIW I'm glad that you're no longer in that situation. He said he wanted me to be his personal playboy bunny. I was not impressed. He'd been sleeping with his female housemate behind my back for about a year at this point though, so I'm sure in his eyes pissing me off wasn't an issue because he already had the girl he really wanted, I was just some extra fun as long as he could get away with it. Losing me wasnt something that bothered him, so I guess he'd see how far he could take it with me. He's now engaged to that girl. I feel horrible for her. I dont think she ever knew about me... 1
Treasa Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 I only read the first post, so forgive me if I'm saying what someone else has said, but possible reasons could be: 1. He knows you're trying to get compliments. It doesn't seem like you're sending the pictures for his enjoyment, but to get told how gorgeous you are. 2. He's wondering how many other guys you've sent naked pictures of yourself to. 3. Tits are tits. Dicks are dicks. Anyone can see naked people pretty much anytime if they live in a modern country and have internet access. As someone who is probably old enough to be your mom, I suggest not sending anything out via electronic form unless you're ok with the entire world seeing it. 6
RogerWallace111 Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 3. Tits are tits. Dicks are dicks. Anyone can see naked people pretty much anytime if they live in a modern country and have internet access. This is probably it. To some degree it's the type of thing where "it's the thought that counts". Especially if you've seen the person naked plenty of times already. If I were him, I'd give a somewhat more enthusiastic or at least expressive response, but not "Wow, you're f*cking amazing. Holy sh*t." Probably something like "Mmm. I can't wait to f*ck you later". 1
bentleychic Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 This is probably it. To some degree it's the type of thing where "it's the thought that counts". Especially if you've seen the person naked plenty of times already. If I were him, I'd give a somewhat more enthusiastic or at least expressive response, but not "Wow, you're f*cking amazing. Holy sh*t." Probably something like "Mmm. I can't wait to f*ck you later". Right. The latter is what I get almost every time. LOL "Me likey" or something about it being his favorite spot or "Looks good", "looks yummy", something of that nature. LOL He loves the pics, though and asks for them, but it's almost always the morning of the day that we plan to shag so it's leading up to something. 2
dasein Posted August 6, 2013 Posted August 6, 2013 Didn't read whole thread. Gauge by his reaction to you in person, not pictures. I'm assuming these reactions of his come via text? Does he write long texts otherwise? Personally, with all the sexting scandals going on an govt surveilance, I don't want women sending these things to my phone, email? maybe, not phone. Maybe he feels similarly. Good luck working through this, but I feel it's NBD as long as he is enthusiastic in person and your sex life is fine otherwise. 1
New User Posted August 7, 2013 Posted August 7, 2013 He said he wanted me to be his personal playboy bunny. I was not impressed. He'd been sleeping with his female housemate behind my back for about a year at this point though, so I'm sure in his eyes pissing me off wasn't an issue because he already had the girl he really wanted, I was just some extra fun as long as he could get away with it. Losing me wasnt something that bothered him, so I guess he'd see how far he could take it with me. He's now engaged to that girl. I feel horrible for her. I dont think she ever knew about me... He sounds very narcissistic. All in all I think that you should consider yourself very fortunate.
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