Would you consider this flirting or fishing for a tip?

[MercuryMorrison1]

So today is my cheat day as far as eating go's. I've been working out alot and watching what I eat, but the only way I can stick to the strict regime is to allow myself one cheat day a week, usually its on the weekend. I've been extra strict now that I'm getting closer to my goal of 185lbs of lean muscle.

 

Well, anyway this week I was craving steak...So I went to a steak house with a friend and ordered a 22 oz porterhouse steak, our waitress who was actually quite cute was fairly talkative with me. When I told her that I wanted to order a 22 oz steak, she told me she would be really impressed if I ate it all.

 

Ok so skip ahead a 1/2 hour later and I'm polishing off my plate. She come's by and is taking our plates away, and comments on how impressive it was that I ate that much in such a short time.

 

As we are getting ready to pay, She hands me my receipt, smiles and walks away. I look at my receipt which she has written ''good job stud!!'' on it.

 

Now I know this whole situation is a little silly, and for the record I am the WORLDS WORST and realizing when a girl is actually interested in me. I've been hit on before but never in a restaurant under these circumstances...As a matter of the fact I would have figured my slamming down 22 oz's of steak would be seen as more repulsive rather than impressive which makes me question her motives. She was tipped the stranded 15% and we went on our way.

 

I was considering going back alone and flirting with her some...But I don't want to waste my time if she's just a tip fiend.

 

Any opinions on this one?

[MrCastle]

Waitresses are hired guns man. Their entire job depends on being nice so they can get extra money.

 

Me and some of my friends have all tried to smoothly pass a waitress our number but in talking to someone who's dated a waitress, they come home with a pocket full of numbers and throw them out without looking at them.

[truth_seeker]

 

As we are getting ready to pay, She hands me my receipt, smiles and walks away. I look at my receipt which she has written ''good job stud!!'' on it.

 

She's into you. The fact that she wrote that says so. I would've have written on the merchant receipt copy - "Stud's number: 555-1234. Call me ;)"

 

No waitress is writing notes on receipts to customer's just to get a tip.

[New User]

If you like her, ask for her number next time. Worst thing that can happen is that you get shot down. Most likely she was working for a tip though.... and you're a light tipper which may have thrown cold water on any attraction she actually did feel.

[MrCastle]

She's into you. The fact that she wrote that says so. I would've have written on the merchant receipt copy - "Stud's number: 555-1234. Call me ;)"

 

No waitress is writing notes on receipts to customer's just to get a tip.

 

I've had messages written -- they want repeat customers.

 

Every restaurant I've gone to allows you to, when you get to the hostess to put in for your table, request a specific waiter/waitress.

 

That's not to shoot him down, just keeping things realistic.

 

One girl even gave my friend HER number and when he went to text her, nothing.

 

You'd be surprised the lengths some people will go.

 

But agree with New User, he can try to get something going next time he goes as long as he goes in with 0 expectations. He has nothing to lose.

[truth_seeker]

I've had messages written -- they want repeat customers.

 

Every restaurant I've gone to allows you to, when you get to the hostess to put in for your table, request a specific waiter/waitress.

 

That's not to shoot him down, just keeping things realistic.

 

One girl even gave my friend HER number and when he went to text her, nothing.

 

You'd be surprised the lengths some people will go.

 

But agree with New User, he can try to get something going next time he goes as long as he goes in with 0 expectations. He has nothing to lose.

 

I disagree here. Why write "Stud"? If a girl is calling me "Stud" I'm taking it as she has some interest in me. All he had to do was act on that. To me, that was a strong signal from her to make a move.

 

Getting a number and nothing coming of it happens a lot. That's a different story.

[truth_seeker]

I've had messages written -- they want repeat customers.

 

She could have written "Have a great night!!!" or "Thanks for coming!!!" Writing "Stud" is a dead giveaway.

 

Just my opinion.

[MercuryMorrison1]

Well, I guess all I can do at this point is go back and flirt a little with her. I'll take the advice given to me and go in with zero expectations...If I walk away with a date then awesome! And if not...At least its an excuse to go eat steak again lol.

[flitzanu]

there is no sex in the champagne room.

 

i don't think that's real flirting, that's flirting professionally. and i'm not challenging any manhood here, but i weigh about 140 and i've eaten a 24oz steak. following my line of reasoning here...eating 22-24 oz of steak didn't feel remarkable to me when others were eating 36oz and 48oz steaks.

 

but, i could be wrong, maybe no one ever eats that much steak there and she was flirting and was impressed. best you could do is go in and hand her your number, but don't keep visiting the restaurant after you do that, because if she isn't into you it's just going to be creepy stalking.

[Carenth]

Very very common tactic to drum up repeat business. Only the truly gullible fall for this imo. I have a a lot of friends who work in hospitality and they fully admit to doing this to increase business. Customers feel special and will come back. Enough people fall for it so it's worth doing.

 

Easiest way leave your number next time don't go back to that place if you hear nothing then there is your answer. I wouldn't hold your breath though.

Edited August 4, 2013 by Carenth

[Ami1uwant]

Well, I guess all I can do at this point is go back and flirt a little with her. I'll take the advice given to me and go in with zero expectations...If I walk away with a date then awesome! And if not...At least its an excuse to go eat steak again lol.

 

I went through this one time I recall.....I went into a restaurant that was the same category class I usually go to and the conversation I had with the waitress was very free flowing...something I dont usually go through when I have gone out before. If it wasnt for the fact I was was from my hometown on business I would have pursued something and left my phone number with her.

[Asage]

As a waitress I felt the need to respond. I've only flirted with one customer and I was actually interested in him (although nothing ever materialized, long story). My point is unless you know this girl you don't know her intentions. Go back and leave a number.

 

And maybe I'm hideous but I've never left work with an apron full of phone numbers.

[Carenth]

It is most likely a cultural thing as well. For example I'm from Australia we have one of the highest minimum wages in the world almost $17 an hour that is minimum wage by law here.

 

So tipping is just not a thing here and the waitresses/waiters and such are not going to grovel over you for the amazing feat of eating food. They will be polite and professional but they will not go overboard. The only time I've seen that sort of behavior is for regular customers where they will call them by first name etc.

 

When I went to Canada last year holy moly went to at least 25 restaurants with my girlfriend whilst I was there and to be honest I found the waitresses/waiters were overly friendly to the point I felt almost embarrassed for them. I would describe it as a fake persona because the hourly rate a waiter makes in Canada/US is crap and they rely on tips as you all know. So if that means flirting a bit throwing out compliments to try and get a few extra dollars they will.

 

Think about it logically. This persons job is to be friendly and kind to you and if they do a good enough job you may give them some extra money so they can continue paying rent this month. They do it because it's how they make a living, you don't actually know this girl or what she is like outside of work.

 

The only wait staff I managed to break out of their shells while I was over there were other Australians. The second I spotted their accent and asked which city they were from and explained I was from there as well or nearby they dropped the act. They knew I wasn't going to rake them over the coals for not pretending to worship the ground I walked on.

 

Not saying it's a bad thing very good customer service but I would take any compliments, notes on receipts etc with a very large grain of salt.

Edited August 4, 2013 by Carenth

[pcplod]

I have to say that it sounds very culture-specific. I've never seen it happen here in the UK either or hear other people talking about it. It does sounds pretty business-aggressive. It sounds like another variation on "Enjoy your meal"!

[Trimmer]

She's into you. The fact that she wrote that says so. I would've have written on the merchant receipt copy - "Stud's number: 555-1234. Call me ;)"

 

No waitress is writing notes on receipts to customer's just to get a tip.

 

I always get stuff on my receipts like "Thanks! Susie" in girlie writing with a little circle dotting the "i" or something like that. At one fantasy level I let myself think it's because I'm charming blah blah blah, but at another, very real level, I'm quite clear that it means nothing.

[Imported]

I always get stuff on my receipts like "Thanks! Susie" in girlie writing with a little circle dotting the "i" or something like that. At one fantasy level I let myself think it's because I'm charming blah blah blah, but at another, very real level, I'm quite clear that it means nothing.

 

What if you get those (sometimes with a #, sometimes not) occasionally from girls ringing you up at the register of stores....not restaurants? I never acted on any of them, they were all just too young.

[jennifersmith]

You said you considered going back to flirt with her some more, and you said she provided great services and chat up with you, and it was in a steak house, and yet you still tip her only 15%. Perhaps go back and tip her a bit more next time to show your appreciation and then ask for her phone no. ... ? When I was in college and have to wait some tables, I have one guy that hit on me , he left me with a $50 dollar tip on a $10 lunch bill. We didn't date (I'm not interested), but I remembered him alright.

[MercuryMorrison1]

You said you considered going back to flirt with her some more, and you said she provided great services and chat up with you, and it was in a steak house, and yet you still tip her only 15%. Perhaps go back and tip her a bit more next time to show your appreciation and then ask for her phone no. ... ? When I was in college and have to wait some tables, I have one guy that hit on me , he left me with a $50 dollar tip on a $10 lunch bill. We didn't date (I'm not interested), but I remembered him alright.

 

I considered leaving an exceptionally high tip, but in the back of mind I didn't want to leave something to excessive just in case she was trying manipulate me into leaving something higher than normal, that would just leave me feeling like a gullible idiot.

 

And also I didn't want to come off as if I were trying to buy a date from her. I'll admit however to being a tad on the stingy side though. Waiters and Waitresses really have to impress me alot to earn that fat tip from me.

[truth_seeker]

Very very common tactic to drum up repeat business. Only the truly gullible fall for this imo. I have a a lot of friends who work in hospitality and they fully admit to doing this to increase business. Customers feel special and will come back. Enough people fall for it so it's worth doing.

 

Easiest way leave your number next time don't go back to that place if you hear nothing then there is your answer. I wouldn't hold your breath though.

 

Not when the woman writes "Stud". You're telling me your friends leave notes calling people "Stud" as a way to drum up future business? There are other ways, as in, "Thanks for coming! :)" or "Hope to see you again! :)"

 

For a girl to call me a "Stud" says something more. No girl would put that out there unless she's doing lap dances in a strip club.

[Trimmer]

What if you get those (sometimes with a #, sometimes not) occasionally from girls ringing you up at the register of stores....not restaurants? I never acted on any of them, they were all just too young.

Yeah, it seems like at a store, it would be much less expected. In direct answer to your question, if I got one like that - especially with a number - I would have trouble believing my usual self-deprecating assumption that it meant nothing. (i.e. I'd probably be pretty impressed with myself.)

 

But not having had that experience, I can only imagine.

 

( P.S. what are you, a male model or something? )

[Ed the 3rd]

You have nothing at all to lose by going back and flirting. Just go there with zero expectations.

[tbf]

She may have considered you attractive, in a masculine way. But this doesn't guarantee that she'd date you, especially considering the possibility that she might already be in a relationship.

 

To confirm, go back and ask her out. If she declines, she was tip flirting. If she accepts, she was flirting with intent.

[Trimmer]

Let's be realistic--it's more likely OP is still a bit chubby. So, he comes into this restaurant and gets a giant size steak. Meanwhile he is unconsciously making goo goo eyes at the pretty waitress. So she goes back in the kitchen with the order and is talking to her waitress friends: "That old fat dude who was trying to flirt with me at table 9 just ordered the giant size steak LOLOLOL. But he looks cheap as **** which is probably why he doesn't have a girlfriend with him. He looks like the kind of cheapskate who will stuff his fat face then leave a measly tip. How do I get the biggest tip out of him?"

 

So her friends probably said to play up to your ego by writing something like that on your meal ticket. "Good job!" is what parents say to their little kids when they clean their plates at meal time. "Stud" was the part where she plays to your ego and tries to get the big tip. Of course it didn't work LOL. Think of "stud" with the sarcasm symbol next to it.

 

This waitress far from "flirting" with you is a little manipulative b*tch. They were probably giggling in the kitchen at what a great big stud you are. Stuffing your face with beef doesn't make you a stud (even if it's your cheat day), it makes you a glutton, at least in the eyes of a "hot chick."

 

You said you were out with a "friend" which must mean another male friend not a female, because had you been with a female, the waitress would have assumed she was your wife or gf and not written such a provocative message to you (too risky if the wife/gf sees it).

 

Believe me no attractive cutey is going to be at all impressed by an overweight guy who is there stuffing his face with a male friend. The assumption will be you are a loser.

Wow, projecting much?

 

Did that cheerleader you asked reject your prom invitation or something?

[MercuryMorrison1]

Let's be realistic--it's more likely OP is still a bit chubby. So, he comes into this restaurant and gets a giant size steak. Meanwhile he is unconsciously making goo goo eyes at the pretty waitress. So she goes back in the kitchen with the order and is talking to her waitress friends: "That old fat dude who was trying to flirt with me at table 9 just ordered the giant size steak LOLOLOL. But he looks cheap as **** which is probably why he doesn't have a girlfriend with him. He looks like the kind of cheapskate who will stuff his fat face then leave a measly tip. How do I get the biggest tip out of him?"

 

So her friends probably said to play up to your ego by writing something like that on your meal ticket. "Good job!" is what parents say to their little kids when they clean their plates at meal time. "Stud" was the part where she plays to your ego and tries to get the big tip. Of course it didn't work LOL. Think of "stud" with the sarcasm symbol next to it.

 

This waitress far from "flirting" with you is a little manipulative b*tch. They were probably giggling in the kitchen at what a great big stud you are. Stuffing your face with beef doesn't make you a stud (even if it's your cheat day), it makes you a glutton, at least in the eyes of a "hot chick."

 

You said you were out with a "friend" which must mean another male friend not a female, because had you been with a female, the waitress would have assumed she was your wife or gf and not written such a provocative message to you (too risky if the wife/gf sees it).

 

Believe me no attractive cutey is going to be at all impressed by an overweight guy who is there stuffing his face with a male friend. The assumption will be you are a loser. Perhaps the assumption was that you and your friend were gay lovers and that was part of the joke of calling you a stud.

 

By the way if you really want a chance at banging this chick what you need to do is go back to the restaurant with the receipt and talk with the manager and complain about what she wrote. Which was totally inappropriate. Suppose you were married and your wife happened to see that receipt?

 

Tell the manager you didn't notice what she wrote until you got home and you are very upset about it. Demand a confrontation with the waitress then tell her to her face "Listen you little b*tch I don't like being mocked by dumb little sluts like you. I came here for a peaceful meal, not to be made fun of. Apologize."

 

That kind of manly alpha behavior will put the tingle between her legs if anything will.

 

 

First off, how exactly does being 25 years old and 6,1 at 190 lbs make me a chubby old fat dude? For the record losing weight isn't my priority in working out...My priority is gaining definition, I've been in shape for several years now and have never been ''fat'' in my whole life.

 

Secondly where do you get off projecting all this bull$hit onto me? What have I ever done to you? I asked a simple question and you've managed to insult me calling me ''fat'' and a ''cheapskate'' and even ''gay'' on multiple occasion's throughout your post.

 

I can only assume that you feel this way because of my tip...Well I'm sorry if Its frowned upon to give the STANDARD 15% tip on a meal, Her service as a waitress was very AVERAGE...Not bad...But not great...Therefore she gets the AVERAGE tip.

 

Are you so miserable with your own pathtic life that all you can do is insult someone you know absolutely nothing about?

[TheGuard13]

I haven't seen a girl use "stud" as anything but a pleasantry/humorous statement for years.

 

I doubt she was serious. But if you really like her, it can't hurt to talk to her, flirt with her a little bit, see if she's interested.