cpr Posted August 3, 2013 Posted August 3, 2013 (edited) So my ex fiance broke it off with me after 3 1/2 years I can't blame him, we have been having plenty of problems. I work and am a full time student, so with that and studying and family all juggled, it was very difficult to make time for him (i'm nearly a straight A student). He on the other hand only had school and has plenty of friends and time to hang out with (he doesn't think its a big deal if he gets bad grades). Our arguments were constantly about me not making enough time for him, that he felt abandoned. He claims he's supportive and wants me to succeed, but his actions seem otherwise. He kept pressuring me to sleep with him, but I had doubts of it working out and my virginity is reserved for the person I plan to marry. I never really made it all the way with him even tho he did manage to pop my cherry. He wasn't comforting when I was in pain during the attempted intercourse and got frustrated with me, making me feel more reluctant He often criticized me every little mistake I make tho he claims he doesn't look for perfection in a woman. I misword a lot, which creates misunderstandings. We were on a long break at one point and lied about sleeping with one of my "Friends" even tho I already suspected. He got so offensive at me when I questioned about it beforehand, leading to more arguing. He frowned upon me whenever I studied or drew pics when I was at his place, that I was supposed to be devoting my time to him. I didn't really like sleeping over there, has he had abusive landlords and nothing to do. I'd rather read and draw during my relaxation time while he likes to drink and watch TV as his way of relaxing. He says i'm boring for my way of relaxing. He hated my family. He didn't want me listening to them and wanted me to choose between them when it was time to move out. He thinks roleplaying = schizo Two days after he dumped me, he left me for someone who likes to party and such. I already suspected them before (they went to a movie together without me), but he claimed he had no interest in her. He actually told me I was the reason they got together. During an argument I told him he should just get with her and he said it was the first time he took me seriously. This girl was also a supposed friend who would not do that to me. His excuse was that he lost interest in me over a year ago, I was angry at him for leading me on, tho he claims he was not trying to do that. If he didn't love me anymore, he shouldn't have begged me to come back and threaten suicide and such. Recently he confronted me after a month of breaking up, bringing back the painful memories. I stood up to him telling him how I felt led on. He claims otherwise and that my opinions were wrong. He is still with this girl yet she hasn't even met his mother, they seem to have more of an online relationship than we did, which was the main source of our arguments. He got offended when I called her his "rebound whore" and such. He claims he still loves me, but he knows he will never get anymore chances with me. He claims he wasn't abusive, tho I feel this was abusive.. I'm his 8th ex, but the longest so far. He was my 1st ex that I dated when I was 21 (im almost 25 now) I can't tell whether i'll get a 2nd chance at love. People prefer looks as a first impression and although I believe I am pretty in my own way, people think otherwise Edited August 3, 2013 by cpr
TaraMaiden Posted August 3, 2013 Posted August 3, 2013 So the guy's an insensitive jerk. Good thing you dodged a bullet. So what is it you need to make sense of, exactly...?
Author cpr Posted August 3, 2013 Author Posted August 3, 2013 So the guy's an insensitive jerk. Good thing you dodged a bullet. So what is it you need to make sense of, exactly...? He claims he wasn't trying to be a jerk and such. I feel so brainwashed And at the beginning things were great, he was patient and supportive
Helloprincess Posted August 3, 2013 Posted August 3, 2013 Sorry to tell you this but he is a jerk! Don't waste your precious time on someone like that. Girls like you, there's no many left. You have values and morals. Keep it that way. Believe me, theres thousands of men looking for a woman like YOU! Focus on school and you. Everything will be fine. It hurts but it becomes better eventually! Good luck xo
TaraMaiden Posted August 3, 2013 Posted August 3, 2013 He claims he wasn't trying to be a jerk and such. I feel so brainwashed At least you see it. There's hope for you yet. Dump, run, and go No Contact. And at the beginning things were great, he was patient and supportive Well....yeah....?! Jerks always are. Isn't that part of the game-plan? 'False sense of security', and all that?
Author cpr Posted August 3, 2013 Author Posted August 3, 2013 (edited) Sorry to tell you this but he is a jerk! Don't waste your precious time on someone like that. Girls like you, there's no many left. You have values and morals. Keep it that way. Believe me, theres thousands of men looking for a woman like YOU! Focus on school and you. Everything will be fine. It hurts but it becomes better eventually! Good luck xo Thanks, like I said he left me and I never looked back. I'm glad he's someone else's problem now Someday someone will look past my appearance and see that i'm a good person. But yeah, school and such comes first At least you see it. There's hope for you yet. Dump, run, and go No Contact. Quote: And at the beginning things were great, he was patient and supportive Well....yeah....?! Jerks always are. Isn't that part of the game-plan? 'False sense of security', and all that? Thanks.. i won't be falling for that again Edited August 3, 2013 by cpr
Waynester Posted August 4, 2013 Posted August 4, 2013 This 'relationship' is done, leave it where it is now.. history. He does not sound like a nice, caring, respectful.. loving person.. which is how it should be when we are in love. To be honest, I know the saying goes 'opposites attract' but this guy really does not sound like your natural 'opposite' if you follow my meaning? You can do sooo much better than him. He may be your 1st ex, but I promise you, there is a genuinely nice guy out there for you..who would reciprocate your love, but with respect & trust. Just an altogether nicer, better man. Hes out there, just please..move on & away from this 'person' You deserve better. Good luck.
Author cpr Posted August 7, 2013 Author Posted August 7, 2013 This 'relationship' is done, leave it where it is now.. history. He does not sound like a nice, caring, respectful.. loving person.. which is how it should be when we are in love. To be honest, I know the saying goes 'opposites attract' but this guy really does not sound like your natural 'opposite' if you follow my meaning? You can do sooo much better than him. He may be your 1st ex, but I promise you, there is a genuinely nice guy out there for you..who would reciprocate your love, but with respect & trust. Just an altogether nicer, better man. Hes out there, just please..move on & away from this 'person' You deserve better. Good luck. Thanks I do deserve better. I just hope I can prevent another 'relationship' like my first
Author cpr Posted November 20, 2013 Author Posted November 20, 2013 (edited) UPDATE After going through this, I realized that I love being single. I probably want to stay single forever. I occasionally have nightmares and fear he's stalking me at school. He's still with his rebound whore, chances are he was cheating on me with her beforehand Unless I could find someone who is truly supportive and loving, i'm happy being a strong independent woman. I hate sex and don't want kids anyway At least my grades have improved and striving better Edited November 20, 2013 by cpr 1
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