Pure Life Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 My ex and I had a very rough breakup. I tried to remain friends but he put forth ho effort in making that work so I gave up on it and went NC. He did a lot of pretty awful things to me during the breakup so I figured that was the best way. He even said things like if I made him move out he'd never talk to me again. (And he did...so why would be wanting to talk to me then?) He's tried to contact me occasionally through FB wanting to be friends. We're also on a few similar other social media sites and someone he'll respond to things I post but I'll still ignore it. It's been about 6 months since I've had any response towards him. Part of me wants to talk to him but the other part feels that if I do I'll end up getting hurt again or he'll use me in some way. But I'm not sure what to do.
supaflyz Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 Putting pride aside, how do you really feel? I'm guessing you want to get back with him. Who broke up with who? Sometimes I think two people could reconnect. Most people would recommend you to stay no contact. If you are afraid that he will use you then you are not ready yet. Did he use u the first time?
aloneinaz Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 I think if you re-read your post, you'll see a lot of red flags that should discourage you from talking to him again or seeking a reconciliation. You said he was pretty terrible to you at the end or after the break up. You want to get back w/this guy? You should really ask yourself some questions about how healthy that relationship was the first time. Something ended it. What would have changed? Most reconciliations don't work. Trust me, my ex and I broke up several times and got back together again. She's my ex now forever.
LME Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 If you have no more romantic feelings towards your ex and are not trying to get back together with them I don't see the harm in contacting them. By the way your post reads i feel like you are not completely over him/may want something more. You also add that he did some terrible things to you after the breakup which makes me question why you would want someone like that around in your life. If i were in your situation i would delete him from all forms of social media and keep no contact.
Author Pure Life Posted August 3, 2013 Author Posted August 3, 2013 Sorry, didn't realize I forgot to mention it. He broke up with me. He ended up cheating on me and leaving me for another girl he only knew for about a week when we were together for 3 years. He's already done too much damage for us to ever get back together relationship wise. He did use me in some ways and even admitted to it. The reason it's tough is because he was my first relationship so my first time dealing with this stuff.
LME Posted August 3, 2013 Posted August 3, 2013 why would you want to talk to someone who treated you so poorly though? 1
Author Pure Life Posted August 3, 2013 Author Posted August 3, 2013 True...I guess I asked myself that same question after our breakup.
Author Pure Life Posted August 3, 2013 Author Posted August 3, 2013 And I guess I should say too, it sucks because I truly did love him but from reading another thread recently, I guess I loved the fantasy part of him. Everyone always loves the good times but even according to him, they weren't actually good times and he put on a fake smile. Which I find a little hard to believe that he could pull off for three years but who knows. I think he's got some mental issues but that's a whole other subject. I just hate being stuck at this middle point where I feel love for him but it would be unhealthy to get back with him so I never would. And on the other hand I also feel like if he got hit by a truck tomorrow I wouldn't mind a bit.
Recommended Posts