berkeley1987 Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 everyone keeps saying no contact is to work on you. but has anyone ever gotten back together using no contact?? my ex gf needs space, and said "when you've given me space, that's when i know you're ready.." ready for what??
alexjames88 Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 (edited) Well so far my ex has not got into contact with me much. Inititally after the break up he contacted me to find out if I had somewhere to live. Once I answered he didn't want to chat. Then we spoke a few months later. Then 6 months after break up he said he missed me and thought about me so we met up. It didn't meet again his wishes. For the next 6 months of little to no contact..I messaged him he would not reply. Now I deleted him but want to initate contact again. No contact allows them to forget you more easily. It also means after A LOT of time they will forget the bad things and remember the good things. If you pester them a lot and beg and generally are pretty pathetic and needy and desperate after the break up but eventually go no contact they will most probably still remember the good but the desperate you. I think this is what my ex thinks about me. So in short as far as I see no contact it does not help them get them back. They will forget you. Then maybe you can re-enter their lives and they might see you as a good dating prospect again. But neither does talking to them and staying in contact when they do not want to be in contact. You have to accept your relationship is terminated and let it rot away. My whole NO CONTACT thing with the man I love is to have him totally forget me and then one day (hopefully soon) get back into contact and maybe we can hang out. I feel I fixed and made changes significant changes to what lead to my break up. But if you expect no contact will mean they will one day re-enter your life it isn't going to happen my friend. If they dumped you then they wont come back. You can only leave them alone for a VERY LONG TIME and hope to get back in touch and get them to fancy you again. Hopefully you can do what I could not which is during that long no contact you forget about them too. Then one day you go "I wonder how Julia is maybe I should message her". It hurts like hell but talking to them for the sake of talking whilst in your heart you know they really no longer want to talk to you right now hurts even more. One other thing: You are never going to find out what she meant by that...Maybe she does not even know what she means/meant by it. I tortured myself for 9 months trying to analyze things my ex said to me. In the end you never find out. That hurts like hell too because you still love and care for them. Edited August 2, 2013 by alexjames88
Author berkeley1987 Posted August 2, 2013 Author Posted August 2, 2013 well i told my ex gf, if she wants me out of her life, she has it. i gave her an option to be with me or out of my life forever. she cried and was very upset. she wants to hang out in the future and be "friends" but i responded that i can't be friends with someone i love, its too hard.
alexjames88 Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 Do you think you could or will be friends with her in the far future once those feelings subside? Why did you break up?
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