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Posted

I would reply, and it's good you are taking responsibility for your part in the past problems of jealousy in your relationship. However, on her end, these feelings seemed to have really affected her and she has always been reluctant to get back together with you. Sometimes just having that insecure feeling and non-trusting feeling will make you not want to get back into a relationship with a person. So be prepared to not only apologize for your half of the jealousy situation, but also the repercussions of that, which was that she didn't want to get back into a relationship with you. You have to become aware of all this stuff that she was dealing with.

 

But I would write back. It seems like it would be great if you could have a long chat with her. Maybe write back and say thanks for the text and ask her if you can buy her dinner soon if she's free. See what she says.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
I would reply, and it's good you are taking responsibility for your part in the past problems of jealousy in your relationship. However, on her end, these feelings seemed to have really affected her and she has always been reluctant to get back together with you. Sometimes just having that insecure feeling and non-trusting feeling will make you not want to get back into a relationship with a person. So be prepared to not only apologize for your half of the jealousy situation, but also the repercussions of that, which was that she didn't want to get back into a relationship with you. You have to become aware of all this stuff that she was dealing with.

 

But I would write back. It seems like it would be great if you could have a long chat with her. Maybe write back and say thanks for the text and ask her if you can buy her dinner soon if she's free. See what she says.

 

"Thanks gorgeous, Miss Ya. Take care?"

 

If she reply's ill ask her our for dinner?

 

What you think ?

Edited by Raid
  • Author
Posted

So we texted back and forth a few times last message from her was that next time I'm in her city to drop her a line.

 

Just so happens ill will be in her city in a few months for an event.

  • 4 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted (edited)

So we caught up in person last night. First time seeing her in years. Felt very natural. Was with her for around 3 hours catching up. I didn't bring up our relationship and either did she. She txtd me after saying it was great to see me etc.

 

Conversation flowed well no awkwardness.

 

Not sure what happens from here.

 

Wait for her to contact? Because I'm the dumper will she have any expectations?

 

Do we need to get x number of dates in before I approach the subject of our relationship?

 

Thanks in advance.

Edited by Raid
Posted

I think you should take the lead on asking her out again since you were the dumper. It seems like enough time has passed that you could just hang out a little without jumping straight into talk of getting back together. At some point, if it doesn't happen naturally, you should just ask her how she feels about trying again. Maybe see if it happens naturally at first. She's probably scared of getting hurt again, so she may not initiate.

  • Author
Posted
I think you should take the lead on asking her out again since you were the dumper. It seems like enough time has passed that you could just hang out a little without jumping straight into talk of getting back together. At some point, if it doesn't happen naturally, you should just ask her how she feels about trying again. Maybe see if it happens naturally at first. She's probably scared of getting hurt again, so she may not initiate.

 

Ok that seems reasonable. Only problem is how do I get a second 'date' with her without comming off overly eager. What's a good amount of time to wait?

  • Author
Posted
Ok that seems reasonable. Only problem is how do I get a second 'date' with her without comming off overly eager. What's a good amount of time to wait?

 

Can anyone help here?

Posted
Can anyone help here?

 

If you want to ask her out... Just do it.

 

All these time frame things are rubbish lol.

 

Go for gold! If she wants to see you, she will be happy you asked whenever it may be

  • Author
Posted
If you want to ask her out... Just do it.

 

All these time frame things are rubbish lol.

 

Go for gold! If she wants to see you, she will be happy you asked whenever it may be

 

LOL i just got told ! :)

  • Like 1
Posted
LOL i just got told ! :)

 

LMFAO my almighty bluntness :-p

  • Author
Posted
LMFAO my almighty bluntness :-p

 

I appreciate the direct approach. Too old for games.

 

Just have no idea how I came across the other night at dinner, I could feel as tho i was a little nervous..

 

Don't really understand her motives for asking to meet up, or where things go to from here (if anywhere)

Posted
I appreciate the direct approach. Too old for games.

 

Just have no idea how I came across the other night at dinner, I could feel as tho i was a little nervous..

 

Don't really understand her motives for asking to meet up, or where things go to from here (if anywhere)

 

Just go with the flow my darling, the worst she can do is tell you to go to hell.

 

Everyone gets nervous, dare I say even me!!

 

Throw caution to the wind and do exactly what you want to do without worrying. We get no where worrying :)

  • Author
Posted
Just go with the flow my darling, the worst she can do is tell you to go to hell.

 

Everyone gets nervous, dare I say even me!!

 

Throw caution to the wind and do exactly what you want to do without worrying. We get no where worrying :)

 

 

Hmm, I might give her a call later..

Posted

Stop overthinking everything. Just do it, you obviously like her and she likes you to. You are the dumper and the ''man'' ok so you have 2 solid reasons to make the move. Just do it already.

  • Author
Posted
Stop overthinking everything. Just do it, you obviously like her and she likes you to. You are the dumper and the ''man'' ok so you have 2 solid reasons to make the move. Just do it already.

 

So I just ask her our again without spilling my guts telling her how I feel?

Posted
So I just ask her our again without spilling my guts telling her how I feel?

 

That's my point of view, I think it's appropriate to ask her out and be friendly, build up the relationship and then talk about your feelings and other things. It's your job to do that since you're the dumper.

  • Author
Posted
That's my point of view, I think it's appropriate to ask her out and be friendly, build up the relationship and then talk about your feelings and other things. It's your job to do that since you're the dumper.

 

Thanks for the advise.

 

I haven't heard anything from her for a few days, will send her a message asking if she wants to meet up again.

 

Only problem is I have to fly 1 hour to meet her which I don't mind doing. I guess I just have to be prepared if she doesn't want to reconcile.

  • Author
Posted
Stop overthinking everything. Just do it, you obviously like her and she likes you to. You are the dumper and the ''man'' ok so you have 2 solid reasons to make the move. Just do it already.

 

Message sent, cross your fingers for me...

  • Author
Posted

Well message didn't go very well, she didn't say yes or no. Told her I had been thinking about her and wanted to see her again.

 

She basically said she was very busy and wouldn't be in my town for a few weeks and didn't want to commit to anything because her brothers having a child..

 

I guess I just wait and see if she rings me for a meet up in 2 weeks...

  • Author
Posted
Well message didn't go very well, she didn't say yes or no. Told her I had been thinking about her and wanted to see her again.

 

She basically said she was very busy and wouldn't be in my town for a few weeks and didn't want to commit to anything because her brothers having a child..

 

I guess I just wait and see if she rings me for a meet up in 2 weeks...

 

Anyone think it's about time I tell her how I feel if I get an opportunity?

Posted
Anyone think it's about time I tell her how I feel if I get an opportunity?

 

Nope (ten characters)

  • Author
Posted
Nope (ten characters)

 

Lol care to elaborate?

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