MBE-Legend Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 I posted on this forums a while back about my ex girlfriend (almost 3 months), it's now been over a month of NC. Some quick background info: We both attend the same university and we dated for almost 2 years. She broke up with me right after the school year finished saying she wasn't happy, we fight to much, and what not. It wasn't a clean breakup at all (it was all through text) however, she said "she needed a break to figure out what she wanted". she just strung me along for a while until I told her I'm done completely, that I didn't want anything to do with her anymore (relationship wise). I tried for about 2 months of very limited contact of trying to work things out. We were best friends, talked about marriage/having kids the whole 9 yards. Then she started saying "I'll always be here if you need anything, you can come to me for anything." I told her it doesn't work like that I'm not her to be your friend. Basically she just kept trying to guilt trip me into being her friend. "We've been through so much together, it be stupid if we weren't friends". We haven't talked since (I stated earlier), but we will be going back to school in 25 days and I don't know exactly how to handle it. We go to a very small university (less then 3000 kids). We will be living in buildings next to each other. So I will see her quite a bit....................................... I unfortunately still have feelings for her even though I hate her for the way she treated me during the ending of our relationship. (texting me she wanted a break and leading me on/lying). I have a new girl who is much better for me overall. My ex would fight me all the time for the stupidest of things, and she IS a very big party girl (loves to go out and drink). My new one doesn't. Nothing is official between me and the new girl, but I just don't know how to handle this. Should I just ignore her completely or be friendly? It sucks, because I cared for this girl more than anything. I gave her so much and try to provide what she needed. She joined a sorority and prior to that she basically needed me, because she didn't have a lot of friends. Now she knows everyone on campus. I feel like she will be very spiteful, if we see each other at parties or what not. (she will probably just go and make out / hook up with guys) since this is the college mentality. That will still break my heart seeing her do that. I do still care for her, but I know there is no role we can play in each others lives (unless we were in a relationship again, but I don't want that anymore for the way she treated me.) I guess I'm just looking for advice on what to do. If anyone needs more info I will provide. Thanks in advance.
richard9 Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 My advice would be to focus on your work, I mean even if you're worried about seeing her ACT like you are going back with more focus on your studies. It seems her opinions of you still matter to you so use this technique to actually limit what she does think about you. That is you are going back to school with new focus and to better yourself, if you go in with that mindset she cant think anything else of you. Hm that make sense? Just get back in there and think, im here to learn so thats what im going to do. If she talks to you then say you've realised how important studies are and you want to make something of yourself. End of conversation. Reinvest yourself positively in the work, any impression she has of you is dependant on how you act. Act as a professional. You never know with this newfound interest in ypur studies you may find you do not even think of her. Just an idea. Hope it helps.
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