dontgiveanef Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 So I've been reading this forum for quite sometime now and decided to ask for some advice and share my story. I recently went through a hard time in my life where I was uncertain of where I wanted to be with my girl. I was going to ask her for some time apart but agreed to work on things with her. About 2 weeks ago she started ignoring me and wouldnt respond to either my txt or calls. So I left it alone a week later she says its over and to leave her alone. I havent said anything to her since and she works in the same building that I work in. My questions are these. I still have feelings for this girl that I didnt even know much. Whats the best way to get rid of them? And do you think there are any chances of her contacting me again? I think the reason I have so many feelngs for her were that she had all the right answers about family and future ideas which I also shared.
robaday Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 Is it possible the reason you wanted a break with her was because she didnt seem that keen? could that have set off your instinct to protect yourself to end it before you got hurt? I just ask because sometimes, even if she wasnt into you, the thought of you nearly leaving may have spurred her into action (i.e. working it out with you) once you agreed then shes now back to being unhappy/bored whatever caused it in the first place Im just speculating. And ps, they always get back in touch,
Antares Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 You can never really tell OP. It's all sort of random, and all sort of depends of the person, the relationship and how it ended. My last relationship was about 3.5 months and she ended it. We never had any fights, and got on really well. I went NC as soon as we ended the break up call. After a few weeks of not hearing a peep from her, I just figured her decision was final and it was time to move on. After almost 3 months of NC, she texted me 2 weeks ago to see how I was doing. We've exchanged a few texts back and forth and she seems super friendly, warm, funny...and even a bit flirty w me. I'm just taking it one step at a time, see where it goes and what she really wants. I thought for sure I'd never hear from her.
Author dontgiveanef Posted August 1, 2013 Author Posted August 1, 2013 Is it possible the reason you wanted a break with her was because she didnt seem that keen? could that have set off your instinct to protect yourself to end it before you got hurt? I just ask because sometimes, even if she wasnt into you, the thought of you nearly leaving may have spurred her into action (i.e. working it out with you) once you agreed then shes now back to being unhappy/bored whatever caused it in the first place Im just speculating. And ps, they always get back in touch, Yes she wasn't giving me enough. I felt that she was good in her own way but just wanted enough for me. She cried when i tried to break up with her and that showed me she cared so I ignored all flaws and decided to make it "work" Little did I know once she saw it wasnt working she decided to cut me off. So I was shocked and still somewhat miss her. However I know if she was to ever come back it would never be the same. I have lost all respect for her she literally ignored me for 1 week before she told me it was over. I spent alot of time with this girl and wasnt expecting for her to ignore me like that, atleast give me a call and tell me its over. Whats the best way to get over these feelings of thinking shes going to call or shes going to try to get back together?
Author dontgiveanef Posted August 1, 2013 Author Posted August 1, 2013 You can never really tell OP. It's all sort of random, and all sort of depends of the person, the relationship and how it ended. My last relationship was about 3.5 months and she ended it. We never had any fights, and got on really well. I went NC as soon as we ended the break up call. After a few weeks of not hearing a peep from her, I just figured her decision was final and it was time to move on. After almost 3 months of NC, she texted me 2 weeks ago to see how I was doing. We've exchanged a few texts back and forth and she seems super friendly, warm, funny...and even a bit flirty w me. I'm just taking it one step at a time, see where it goes and what she really wants. I thought for sure I'd never hear from her. That sounds cool, I guess its best to go NC. However I try to avoid her and she seems to be in the same areas I am. I havent actually seen her yet but we do work in the same building like I said. I try to avoid her area as much as possible because knowing her she'll think im trying to see her.. Your situation sounds goo man, I would be careful though...
happydate Posted August 1, 2013 Posted August 1, 2013 Yes she wasn't giving me enough. I felt that she was good in her own way but just wanted enough for me. She cried when i tried to break up with her and that showed me she cared so I ignored all flaws and decided to make it "work" Little did I know once she saw it wasnt working she decided to cut me off. So I was shocked and still somewhat miss her. However I know if she was to ever come back it would never be the same. I have lost all respect for her she literally ignored me for 1 week before she told me it was over. I spent alot of time with this girl and wasnt expecting for her to ignore me like that, atleast give me a call and tell me its over. Whats the best way to get over these feelings of thinking shes going to call or shes going to try to get back together? When you said she was not giving you enough, can you tell me in what way?
Author dontgiveanef Posted August 1, 2013 Author Posted August 1, 2013 When you said she was not giving you enough, can you tell me in what way? I felt emotionally she wasn't giving me enough. She was pretty independent and in her own world. It seemed that just even trying to spend time together would require enormous planning. I spoke to her about it and wasnt really trying to be with someone that I would see if maybe once a week or a txting buddy. It felt like we were in 2 different worlds trying to meet.
Author dontgiveanef Posted August 1, 2013 Author Posted August 1, 2013 Well I just learned that my ex is actually out and about living her life like everything is great. For some reason it upsets me. I makes me sick thinking that I actually thought she was breaking up or ignored me because she didnt want to hurt me? I need to stop thinking about her. Only if it was as easy as flipping a switch.
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