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breaking up with someone i love and who loves me more than life itself.

Kvd92

By Kvd92
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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Kvd92 New Member

Kvd92

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I am a 21 year old female dating a 23 year old man. we have been together for three years now. He treats me like royalty, his life is all about me and he hasn't done anything wrong... The problem is I no longer enjoy spending time with him and I see less and less of a future. I'm moving 5 hours away for school and getting on with my life whereas he has no education and a life sucking job and has no motivation to change. I love him and doing this to him is going to break my heart and make me feel like the worst person ever but im just not happy with him. Lately he has been telling me how he loves me more than anything in his life and its killing me because I just don't feel the same... not to mention my parents LOVE and ADORE him.

 

In two weeks we have a vacation to Florida planned to stay with my sister and celebrate my birthday that she missed. he spent almost $400 on his plane tickets and they are non refundable.. my question Is how exactly do I break up with someone I care so deeply about, what do I say? and do I do it now or let him enjoy the Florida vacation first.. ?

supaflyz Established Member

supaflyz

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This is tough..... I don't really know he does treat you really good. You are only 21. Take more time and see is the relationship worth saving. I mean people usually break up do to too much fighting, cheating, arguments.... YOu might look back at this down the road and regret it.

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Kvd92 New Member

Kvd92

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I don't really think I need time to try and save it.. I've been debating this for over a month (maybe even two!)now and trying very hard to see what I used to be in love with. I just don't want to be with him and I think I need to give up the fight before our relationship goes long distance and I end up stringing him along and wasting his time.

Eddie Edirol Established Member

Eddie Edirol

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Tell him exactly what you wrote here. Tell him the truth, that his lack of ambition turned you off permanently and youre not in love with him anymore. BTW if he is clueless about how you feel at this point, then you are the worst person in the world for not cluing him in. And dont take him to florida, but pay him back for the plane tickets.

fujidabruin Established Member

fujidabruin

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whether you plan to be on your own or date soon after, the bottom line is "you are not happy" right???

 

Doing what is right for you is right for the relatonship and ultimately for him instead of stringing him along and causing resentment. The right thing to do is often not easy.

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Kvd92 New Member

Kvd92

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Tell him exactly what you wrote here. Tell him the truth, that his lack of ambition turned you off permanently and youre not in love with him anymore. BTW if he is clueless about how you feel at this point, then you are the worst person in the world for not cluing him in. And dont take him to florida, but pay him back for the plane tickets.

 

I'm pretty certain he has sensed my distance. our love life has slowed tremendously and I've been spending a lot more time with my girlfriends.

 

I do not have $400 to pay him. I'm a college student.

Eddie Edirol Established Member

Eddie Edirol

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I'm pretty certain he has sensed my distance. our love life has slowed tremendously and I've been spending a lot more time with my girlfriends.

 

I do not have $400 to pay him. I'm a college student.

 

Distance doesnt count for someone that is still head over heels for you, he'll just rationalize your behavior. But if you dont want to spend your florida vacation with him, pay him back.

Misfortune Established Member

Misfortune

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Have you ever tried to help him move forward in life? Why'd you get with him if you're so far along in your education/life and he has nothing going on?

 

Have you had talk with him about this stuff or having you been trying to work things put by keeping everything to yourself and hoping something magical happens?

Edited by Misfortune
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Kvd92 New Member

Kvd92

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Have you ever tried to help him move forward in life? Why'd you get with him if you're so far along in your education/life and he has nothing going on?

 

Have you had talk with him about this stuff or having you been trying to work things put by keeping everything to yourself and hoping something magical happens?

 

I have tried. tried and tried and tried. I have pushed him all I can.

Misfortune Established Member

Misfortune

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If you feel you've given it all you can then you should end it before your love turns into resentment.

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