EJ787 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 so, I met this charming, engaging server. He gave every indication that he found me charming and gorgeous (he literally used those words), I know, I know servers are paid to flirt. But, I'm new in my town and I really want to meet people, so I looked him up on a social media venue. I sent a short message referring to a joke he told when we met at the restaurant. He didn't respond, but the social media I reached out to him on was connected to his professional account, so I wasn't sure if he only used it for work or not. So... I reached out to him via another social media outlet. I again sent a funny message referencing the joke he told, and he added me as a friend, but did not send a message back. Two things, 1) this guy is charming and cute 2) I'm new in town and don't know a lot of people. I was thinking about contacting him once more, saying something persistence being the answer to all things in life, and explaining that since I'm new in town I'm being persistent because I'm still trying to meet people and would he like to go to happy hour? However, is this too much? I mean I have definitely reached out 2X already, so if he was interested he could have responded, but why friend me if he wasn't interested? Usually when people ask these questions they know the answer, and the general consensus ends up being "he's just not that into you" However, we haven't even had a first date, so I guess I'm just not sure how hard to push for a meet up. I'm someone who doesn't get offended or bothered when people ask me out, I have no problem saying no, but I've never gotten all worked up over persistence especially if I've been ambiguous. If I've said no over and over and over its one thing, but if I've been ambiguous then I don't get worked up, I'm usually ambiguous because I'm still deciding how I feel. and I think adding me, but not saying anything is ambiguous. At this point I have nothing to lose if I reach out to him again, except he's a server at my favorite restaurant in town, so if I make too much of a jerk out of myself I'll hate running into him when I go back. The other thing I thought of doing is just going back to his restaurant and seeing how he acts there, however, its not exactly a cheap restaurant, so it's kind of a commitment to go back... So would you take the risk and reach out once more?
MidwestUSA Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 No, no, and NO! You answered your own question - it will be weird seeing him at the restaurant. Keep eating there and hope for the best, but he probably finds it creepy that you tracked him down not once, but twice, via social links!
Author EJ787 Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 Hahahahaha... this is one of those I already know the answer to the question posts... Thanks ya'll
jcrew11 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Its possible he has a girlfriend and just enjoys flirting with new women.
Brunettie Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 I would just see how he is next time you happen to be there.
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