somedude81 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Wow, how the hell have you manged to last a year in this relationship? I've been with my GF for a little over a month now, and we have sex at least two days a week and it's usually a couple of times a day. I seriously can't imagine having sex with her only once a month. Why have you stayed with your GF throughout all of this?
hestheone66 Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 to accept such a lack in 2 relationships would require a long honest look at why you let this happen. next time make it clear that you will never be with a woman who is not physically affectionate
oldshirt Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 (edited) - the smoking is just a smokescreen and misdirection. You could go cold turkey tomorrow and she would then say your earlobes are too long or toenails curl too funny. She just doesn't have any desire, passion or intimacy for you. She is simply settling for the comfort and convenience of being with you. - She will dump you in a heartbeat the moment she meet someone that does trip her trigger and you would jump on the first attractive gal that has the hots for you. You and this dead fish are in an arms race to see who will meet someone else and hit the ejection handle first. - dating is an interview and tryout process where people do things together and get to know each other in a variety of life conditions to determine if that person is the one they want to marry and raise a family with or not. A year for a full grown adult is a very adequate amount of time to make that determination and it is also a very reasonable time frame to move on if the answer is no. She has had a fair tryout and interview. - we all have our own values, mores and criteria to make that determination. You do not need to get our approval and validation to determine that someone is not right for you. - you are under absolutely no obligation to explain in explicit details why you no longer wish to continue the relationship so there is no need to worry about being the asshat for dumping her for not putting out. A simple, " I do not feel we are a good enough match to continue.." or ," we are two different people wanting different things..." or " this is not working out for us..." etc etc is all that is necessary. She will call you an asshat to her friends no matter what you say or do. There is no completely painless way to get dumped. Get over that. - Sounds like she isn't really going to be too heartbroke anyway. - relieve her of your relationship obligations and within a month or two both you will be dating other people that make each of you happier. Edited July 31, 2013 by oldshirt 1
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