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True of false? Men and women are equally "shallow" when selecting mates

BeholdtheMan

By BeholdtheMan
in General Relationship Discussion

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USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

Posted
Posted
You can't separate physical from non-physical. Most of the time people are not conscious of it.

 

Then how can people fantasize about sleeping with others whom they've never met? Why would I want to relate with Kristen Stewart if I've never spoken a word to her? :confused:

Babolat Established Member

Babolat

Posted
Posted
Men focus on a women's looks

 

Women focus on men's looks and money/status (status covers confidence and charisma)

 

To sum it up, men care more about appearance, whereas women of course still care about a man's appearance but also have more materialistic concerns

 

 

Fact of the matter is...neither gender is sexually attracted to good moral character or personal integrity. These considerations are major factors when considering long-term relationships or marriage...but they're not the basis for sexual attraction.

 

Why is it shallow to know you need to be attracted physically to someone in order to be in a relationship with them? I don't care if YOU find them physically attractive, but I have to be physically attracted to them. And personality, character, values, morals are in my top 5 list of attractions, so I do disagree with you there. Also, financially responsble is up there too. She does not have to be rich, just responsible.

 

Trust me, I recently broke up with THE most attractive woman I have ever met, yet even dated. Her morals and values, and our differences there, got to be too much for me though. She also had major financial issues and was financially irresponsible; I did not want that in my life/future.

Imported Established Member

Imported

Posted
Posted
You can't separate physical from non-physical. Most of the time people are not conscious of it.

 

Not sure how you mean that.

 

Physically attractive that makes it so other people will look at your non-physical side as also attractive even if that isn't the case?

 

Or a really nice personality that makes it so other people overlook how overweight and unattractive that person is?

 

Pretty sure the physically attractive side is always going to win out. Maybe not with this girl or that girl out of 100, but the 98 other girls.

 

Of course, physically attractive doesn't mean you're going to have a bad personality....but ugly is ugly.

Southern Cal Dude Established Member

Southern Cal Dude

Posted
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Yeah if you're very good looking women are willing to throw their shame to the side and have casual sex even if they know youre juggling tons of other women,my good looking friend is a known player and these women still dont mind being just one of many

 

 

Players have been pre-selected. Women don't mind sharing a top guy. They don't care if he's sleeping with 4-5 others. And if they end up with an STD or cervical cancer, this is why. I'm at the point where I may have to start requiring STD testing before sex since women have more casual sex than men.

Emilia Established Member

Emilia

Posted
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Then how can people fantasize about sleeping with others whom they've never met? Why would I want to relate with Kristen Stewart if I've never spoken a word to her? :confused:

Because it's a fantasy in your mind. You give them characteristics mentally that you find attractive.

 

If the above was the case people wouldn't go off each other when they meet in real life.

  • Like 3
Emilia Established Member

Emilia

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Not sure how you mean that.

I mean when you meet a person whom you find beautiful, you are attracted to aspects of her that aren't just to do with the symmetry of her face or the size of her breasts. There are lots of subtle, nuanced little things that people find attractive they don't even realise.

 

As per my previous post to Hokie.

  • Like 4
PJKino Established Member

PJKino

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Posted
Players have been pre-selected. Women don't mind sharing a top guy. They don't care if he's sleeping with 4-5 others. And if they end up with an STD or cervical cancer, this is why. I'm at the point where I may have to start requiring STD testing before sex since women have more casual sex than men.

 

lol it seems that way.. A girl in our social circle i thought was kind of into me because she was actually flriting with me but apparently she wasnt really into me, he comes in talks to her for a few minutes and starts making out with her.

 

If i ever do get a girlfriend im convinced shes gonna end up attracted to my friend..women cant seem to control themselves in front of good looking charming guys whter theyre married or not and even if the guys a known player juggling tons of women that wont stop them from trying to be "the one"

Emilia Established Member

Emilia

Posted
Posted
.women cant seem to control themselves in front of good looking charming guys whter theyre married or not and even if the guys a known player juggling tons of women that wont stop them from trying to be "the one"

True! The Saudi Arabians have it right, let's put us all in a hijab with a full veil so we don't keep tempting men! How no-one in the west has never tought of that....

  • Like 3
ThaWholigan Established Member

ThaWholigan

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Posted

Men and women are both shallow to varying degrees. I don't agree that women are more shallow because I know plenty of ugly or otherwise not very spectacular dudes that get laid often.

 

I think its an interesting but pointless discussion. It always interests me because I can tell the kind of people that others draw to them when they talk about who is more shallow, particularly the men. Girls can be shallow though, but I know an equal amount of shallow men too.

  • Like 1
sweetjasmine Established Member

sweetjasmine

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True! The Saudi Arabians have it right, let's put us all in a hijab with a full veil so we don't keep tempting men! How no-one in the west has never tought of that....

 

No, you have it the other way around. If women are the ones who can't control themselves around all these hunks, the men should be the ones to wear burqas. You shouldn't wave a raw steak in front of a tiger's face, y'know! ;):lmao:

  • Like 2
CloverField1227 Member

CloverField1227

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I don't get it.

 

If men are attracted to women by only looks.

 

And women attracted to men by looks, status AND money, wouldn't that make the woman a little less shallow? :laugh:

 

The looks department though is really generic. We rate people all differently. Sure we can logically define what makes a beautiful person - symmetrical features, fit, young, etc. that we can all agree upon. But what attracts us to them on a deeper level goes through with time. Even with men, an unattractive women to other men can be the most beautiful person to that man. But if the dislike is deep within that man, an attractive woman can also become quite ugly and gross.

  • Like 1
CloverField1227 Member

CloverField1227

Posted
Posted
True! The Saudi Arabians have it right, let's put us all in a hijab with a full veil so we don't keep tempting men! How no-one in the west has never tought of that....

 

And rich single men should dress up as beggars, then hop into their Lexus' at the end of the day :laugh:. There you go, an original Western Idea.

Drseussgrrl Established Member

Drseussgrrl

Posted
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Who cares?

 

People like who they like and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.

 

Either you try and be whatever they want or do what I do... Be yourself and enjoy the people who actually like / want to with you.

 

I swear 90% of the people on here get all twisted into a pretzel over people they don't even know, like, talk too or have any sort of relationship with.

 

Most of you are not 8, 9 or 10s. Most of you will never be a 8, 9 or 10s, you will never have a snowballs chance in hell of ever dating a 8, 9 or 10 and why most of you O.L.D. However, most of you spend 99% of your time thinking, worrying about, pondering and being upset over what 8, 9 or 10s do or don't do.

 

Damn. Harsh, brah.

smile1983 Established Member

smile1983

Posted
Posted
Men focus on a women's looks

 

Women focus on men's looks and money/status (status covers confidence and charisma)

 

To sum it up, men care more about appearance, whereas women of course still care about a man's appearance but also have more materialistic concerns

 

 

Fact of the matter is...neither gender is sexually attracted to good moral character or personal integrity. These considerations are major factors when considering long-term relationships or marriage...but they're not the basis for sexual attraction.

That's not true of all women, I wouldn't know if it is true of all men or not but I would assume that it is not. I find men more physically attractive when they are kind, funny, etc. These are values that bump up the attractiveness factor for me. Prime example: I first saw Steve Carrell in The Office, a show where he plays kind of an insensitive jerk and I thought he was sort of ugly. Then I saw him in a movie called Dan in Real Life where he plays a sweet single father trying to sort out his life. I thought he was really cute in that movie. So for me, attractiveness is not based on economic status or charisma but more on kindness and sense of humor.

Southern Cal Dude Established Member

Southern Cal Dude

Posted
Posted
Who cares?

 

People like who they like and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.

 

Either you try and be whatever they want or do what I do... Be yourself and enjoy the people who actually like / want to with you.

 

I swear 90% of the people on here get all twisted into a pretzel over people they don't even know, like, talk too or have any sort of relationship with.

 

Most of you are not 8, 9 or 10s. Most of you will never be a 8, 9 or 10s, you will never have a snowballs chance in hell of ever dating a 8, 9 or 10 and why most of you O.L.D. However, most of you spend 99% of your time thinking, worrying about, pondering and being upset over what 8, 9 or 10s do or don't do.

 

 

Luckily I don't have this problem. But I think you do. :lmao:

Southern Cal Dude Established Member

Southern Cal Dude

Posted
Posted
Is what I am saying false?

 

Why does every thread in the dating section turn into a GENDER WAR?

 

I will tell you why...

 

You have a TON of women / men on here with ZERO self-esteem, self-worth and who suck at dating trying to paint the ENTIRE opposite gender black. All they are trying to do is convince EVERYONE in the world / internet that their "misfortune" is all solely due to the opposite sex and has nothing to do with them. It's all a ploy so they can feel better about themselves and it's why they continue to lie to themselves and blame everyone else for their own inadequacies

 

 

Not everyone can be the charming dating success that you are. And I'm around models regularly as I'm one too. They're actually worse than the average joes.

Southern Cal Dude Established Member

Southern Cal Dude

Posted
Posted
and? if he chooses to comment, so be it.

 

whilst he's most likely big in heart but small below, he does have a point in fairness. some people simply need to acknowledge they are not desirable. there is more to life than sex and dating.

 

 

Just because he said something that's not entirely inaccurate doesn't mean he's this Don Juan who has 5 hotties lined up. There's more to life than success with the opposite sex, but evolutionary success from the male perspective is promiscuity and offspring.

Babolat Established Member

Babolat

Posted
Posted
Yeah I don't think so. Suspended from the bodybuilding forum?

 

No disrepect to either of you, but THIS was funny!

 

And, which of the 5 did you pick..the shallower one? :D

 

I personally do not approach woman, in bars, at the mall (no idea when I last went to a mall either..is that where men pick up girls now?), the bookstore, etc. For the most part when I am out doing my thing I want to be left alone. I find approaching someone like that to be shallow.

 

If I am in a social setting, with a group, and a woman in the circle, group catches my interest, yeah, I will show an interest or "persue" them if I find them attractive. And their Hotness does not intimidate me at all.

 

I recently went out with a girl who was intimidated by my looks/personality, which shocked me. She said she never thought a man "like me" would be interested in her. And I found her gorgeous, though some may find her average.

PlumPrincess Established Member

PlumPrincess

Posted
Posted

What is it with all these male models posting on LS lately? :confused:

Star Gazer Established Member

Star Gazer

Posted
Posted
Yes, to a person who is not fit (slim), you will be accused of being shallow. People hate on what they don't have themselves, and by calling you out as "shallow," they have exonerated themselves from not meeting up to your preferences. Rather than them not being "good enough" for you, you are not "good enough" for them because you're "shallow." It's simple deflection.

 

If that's true, why do rich men call gold diggers shallow?

  • Like 1
PJKino Established Member

PJKino

Posted
Posted
True! The Saudi Arabians have it right, let's put us all in a hijab with a full veil so we don't keep tempting men! How no-one in the west has never tought of that....

 

Oh please i didnt mean that stop the hyperbole but most women dont mind fighting over one dude where a man will usually get out of the way if he sees other suitors especially ones he knows

charlietheginger Established Member

charlietheginger

Posted
Posted
Oh, look. Another of the hundreds of posts where a guy tells it like it is about what women like and are like.

 

I mind sharing a "top guy." I would care if he was sleeping with 4 - 5 others. I'm not an anomaly.

 

You guys are probably mis-interpreting that crap. If the "top guy" (which, sorry, but why, exactly, are YOU a "top guy"?) is a dishonest player, he'll probably having more success juggling several girls than an awkward average joe. I mean, if "top" means good looking.

 

Women in the higher echelon of dating will share a top guy

 

A doctor,lawyer,politician making 100s of thousands a yr has options

The women know it so they enjoy the nice cars,nice dinners,nice gifts

But those women know they will probably never be with that man

Long-term.

 

We all see these women "oh i dated a doctor ,or oh he is the tv weather man"

But usually these women never are asked to marry.

charlietheginger Established Member

charlietheginger

Posted
Posted
Pictures. Real ones. No fakies. :bunny:

 

Being a model is no big deal. Ive done work for catalogues

Clothing.

Im 5"9 redheaded and freckled.

 

its pretty boring imo dosnt pay much. Like 100bucks

A hour for 2~4 hours then the agency takes 25%.

Then you have to drive to the location could be hours away.

 

An example i drove 1 each way spent $40in gas

worked 2 hours pay was 300 agency kept $$75

So out of the 4 hours including drive time after gas

I made $250.... Not exactly a big amount.

 

Now some guys working for big companies make 2 3000

A shot the models are elite and only a handfull are in that

Circut doing shoots everyweek making 6figures.

 

But models for stuff like weekly flyer ads , brochures dont make much

Per shoot. Low pay 300 800 a shoot mid 800 1500 high is 1500 to 4000

 

And to make high pay in the male model world your

6"2 165 170lbs 8pack abs pouty lips sunking face and

Huge cheekbones with flawless skin

MrTurk Established Member

MrTurk

Posted
Posted (edited)
Exactly. I've been propositioned by females from 15-50+. I happen to be that cookie cutter pretty boy you're referring to. Women are most definitely shallow when it comes to looks as well. Difference is while they'll make average guys wait, they'll put out for guys like me without a second though...and they'll deny it. "Oh I don't have casual sex" :rolleyes:

 

That is 100% true. And thats what irritates me with women. Is how they try to hide all of that stuff. And present themselves as perfect little angels....all the while pointing the finger at men, labeling them as pigs.

 

I know a very, very attractive guy, that is fit and has that typical athletic jock look and swagger. years ago...when OLD just started getting popular...he made a profile...and no exaggeration...probably ****ed at least 30 different women a year, for 3 years. He litterally had women throwing themselves at his crotch....and then friends of theres started contacting him as well.

 

Women will put on that act for 90% of them men out there.....telling them how they just want a nice guy, someone that they are attracted to, and someone they can grow old with.....but at that same time....those same women are being pounded regularly, by 10% of the men out there.

 

There is a very high percentage of women, sharing, and playing musical chairs with the top 10-20% of the males out there.

Edited by MrTurk
charlietheginger Established Member

charlietheginger

Posted
Posted

No doubt a women has to be attracted

Lets be real what women whats a ugly guy in her

Wedding pictures , on facebook ,or to take to her family

 

Ugly people are screwed.... But their is hope

eating healthy, excersize, plastic surgery can

All be done

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