2fit4u89 Posted July 29, 2013 Posted July 29, 2013 Relationship advice hes 24 I'm 23. So my boyfriend and I have been through a lot together, and we just got back together about 3 months ago.after being broken up for 6 months . I love him so much! Before that we dated for a year and a half but it was rocky because he was still getting over his ex but I stuck around then ended it with him a while Cter because he was talking to other girls like there fb pic ect. And I just had it. but when we decided to get back together we both said "we were going to commit to only each other " So I basically moved in with him . But I still have a duffle bag I keep all my clothes in . granted (he doesn't have a big room)(and he has a roommate) so we have to share a shower and kitchen, but can't help but feeling like maybe he wants space .. To add to this stress I'm in transition. With jobs and don't have of I say thhat because for the last 2 weeks even on weekends(which we both have off ) he has been working on his car ALL DAY! And on his computer not saying a word! Which dont get me wrong everyone needs space Andtime to do their own thing, and he is passionate About it, and I don't know if I'm just thinking to much.. But I'm insecure right now because I just found out, while we were broken up he had sex with two girls , and I asked him before we got together And he said "hadn't slept with Anyone" I'm hurt, yes-that he slept with other people ..but I'm not mad,because we were broken up I'm mad because he lied. With that said I have been not so trusting.I shouldn't have , but I did I looked through his computer And phone. I know! Bad me! But I feel like; well he lied about sleeping with people so why wouldn't he lie about other things... I found tons of pics of his ex of them kissing and very intimate pics( which him and I have close to none) Which also upsets me. It broke my heart all over again. And the way he looked at her...he never looks at me that way :'( and that hurts And he's been texting a girl he was seeing as well. I didn't look at their convo because I'm afraid what I might see. With everything negative I just said , he does tell me that he loves me, and I do love him very much but I'm so close to tears all the time. When he fessed up about sleeping with the other girls we both cried and begged me to forgive him( I'm trying) and I did confront him about his ex and the photos and he deleted them without getting upset.
Menina Posted July 29, 2013 Posted July 29, 2013 Once I read that when someone gets to the point of snooping is because there's a reason behind it, maybe because you're suspicions are more closely to being true than to being false. You broke up a first time because he wasn't over his ex, now you get back together and he obviously is still not over his ex, and he lied. And then you move in with him and he distances himself from you. I'm sorry, but from what I read this relationship can give you lots of suffering. If you still want to continue in your relationship I suggest couple's therapy, but seriously if I were you I would just break it off. I recently broke up with my bf of 3 years, and it was our second break...gues what...I broke up for the same reason I broke it off the same time. The first time he begged me he'll change, that he loves me, he cried...so I let him in again on my life. He did change, for the first weeks, then fast forward one year, he still did the SAME things he did the first time. That's when I realize that the saying is true, "the first time is his fault, the second time..". Think about how this relationship and his behaviour is affecting you, think about what you want in a man and if you could ever trust someone that lied, probably cheated on you, and flirted with other girls. Something I learned in this second definite break is that I feel much better than during the first break and much better than how I felt during the last months of my relationship. Breaking up, as you already know, is bad but almost everyone breaks up and you're young, there's better fish in the pond.
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