OverThinker72 Posted July 28, 2013 Posted July 28, 2013 It's 2 weeks tomorrow since we broke up. Yesterday was a very bad day, even though I went out with friends and tried to have a laugh. Today was better but we usually have a 4 hour telephone conversation Sunday nights so the silence is killing me right now. I read that there are many stages to get through when you experience a break up. I didn't do any of the pleading or begging. He broke up with me in a text and my reply was "Ok", never contacted him again. I'm not sure whether I would have felt better if I had fought for him a bit. The other thing that worries me is that I am a very passive person and rarely get angry. I want to feel the anger so that I can release some of the pain. I'm scared that I will be stuck in the same stage if I don't go through the anger. What else can I do to move on? I sometimes fantasize about him wanting me back so that I can tell him to go feck himself. I don't want him back at all but feel like I should've shown some kind of reaction. Advice would be welcome. Thanks xx
Similar Posted July 29, 2013 Posted July 29, 2013 He broke up with you in a text.. not worth being angry I guess? you don't sound like you're in a lot of pain to me. Or maybe you're shocked? I don't think its something to worry about; you fantazise about being mean to him and that's kind of angry I think. Should be happy that you don't feel it, anger is very tiresome.
tinker683 Posted July 29, 2013 Posted July 29, 2013 Sounds like you're still in denial, it hasn't quite sunk in yet. I went through the same feeling for about 2 or 3 months. When I found out she had already gotten into another relationship very shortly after we had broken up, THAT was when the flood gates came down. You'll get there....your heart is just taking in the shock of all of this one little piece at a time. Once it's been fully ingested, *THEN* you'll get good and pissed
Author OverThinker72 Posted July 29, 2013 Author Posted July 29, 2013 Thank you both for your words To be honest I'm not in denial. He was with someone else within a week and that gave me the push to move on. I've cried a lot and breathing hurts but I rather endure all this than even think about wanting him back. I think in my case it's easier than others because we don't live in the same town, share the same social circle or have too much history. But I love him still. I deleted all memories, including texts, phone number, pics and gifts the very same day he ended it. I just think I forced myself to move on but it doesn't seem right. I'm in my early 40's but the last time I felt anything near love was when I was 16 years old. This was my first adult love story I know I don't want him back. Just want to hate the fecker lol. OMG that actually does sound like denial ffs lol x
tinker683 Posted July 29, 2013 Posted July 29, 2013 Ah I see. Well...it's possible you've skipped past that and you're already in depression. I'm *just* now getting out of the anger stage and am drifting alongst the depression stage toward acceptance.
AllTooWell Posted July 29, 2013 Posted July 29, 2013 You might just not be an angry person. I'm not either. I think I had maybe a day where I was angry at my ex - but that was because he had said something mean to me. I just don't get angry. Being angry with someone, to me, shows weakness in some forms but also is useless to my own well-being. Being angry doesn't make me feel better, or make me care less about you. I'd rather skip being angry.
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