confusedmind Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 [color=blue][/color][font=arial][/font] Hi guys... hope you can help me out with this one cause i really don't know what to do.. I met this guy prob just over 6 months ago through a friend, and instantaniously after being introduced to eachother we locked eyes for about 5 seconds... it was the wierdest thing that has ever happened to me, i thought those sort of things just happened in the movies. Then later in the night we talked and talked, and got along so well, but niether of us made a move on eachother. I know i personally didn't want to rush things... so i got his number at the end of the night and we have kept in contact. We have been out about 4/5 times since then, and everytime we find that we are able to talk about anything and everything to eachother. I don't know what it is, but we have this unbelievable connection that i've never found before.... after everytime we went out i found myself getting more and more attracted to him... Anyway, we all went out for my birthday a couple of weekends ago, and i knew after that night that i had to say somethign to him, i just couldn't take it any longer. The main reason i put it off for so long was because i was afraid of ruining the great friendship we had going... but i had to know his feelings. So yeah i told him that i really liked him, and that my main fear in telling him was because i didn't want to ruin things. told him that the choice was ultimately his, but had a feeling inside me that something was telling me not to let this go... Anyhow, we spoke about it, and his reply was basically, if he didn't have so much going on with uni then he would, but it wouldn't be fair starting something with me because he would have hardly any time. He also said that if he was going out with me he'd want to spend as much time as possible with me and that it wouldn't be possible... I respect his decision, i totally do, but it is soo hard to hear it, because for the first time in my life i've found someone who i've connected with soo well! I don't want to let this one go because i think we could have a great relationship... its almost like soul mates..!! Not suprisingly, now that i've told him how i feel we don't talk as much anymore (we used to talk couple of times a day, we haven't spoken for bout 4 days now)... Do you think i've wrecked any chance of being with him? Relationship or friendship?? I don't know what to do. it is so hard hearing that if timing was different then he would go out with me... i don't konw how to handle that because obviously he has feelings for me aswell?! argh!!! any advice would be great.... sorry for the longggg post Link to post Share on other sites
DJ_Dork Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 You have committed a mistake that many guys have done for when going for girls. Maybe you were "too serious" for someone that "wasn't serious." 4 days? Hmmm, he might be thinking some things over.. continue waiting but consider him a lost cause a week or more after this. I wish girls would be upfront like you and make it known their feelings rather than having me confused and playing mind games. Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 It's possible that the timing excuse was just that - an excuse. It would have been hard for him to say, "I really can't fathom the idea of you being my gf." That's just a possibility - and if it were the case, keep in mind it would just be his opinion anyway. I think you should go back to the kind of friendship you had before. Either tell him directly, or show strong unspoken signs, that this is not "serious" and is just spending time and having fun with a good friend. I know you feel rejected and embarrassed, but that just means you need to use the strength of your personality to overcome. Do it from a position of fundamental self-love, and it will be easier. Link to post Share on other sites
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