Gives me space that I didn't ask for because he thought he was smothering me.

[That_girl]

There's this guy that I have been seeing for about 4 months and everything was going great. He was an awesome guy, always really caring. We went from being friends for three years, to having strong feelings for each other, to the point where I kind of felt like I loved him. He's always been the one chasing me and calling me. One night we got into an argument because he was text messaging some girl and I got jealous. I guess I didn't have a right to be jealous since I wasn't his girlfriend...but I told him how I felt nonetheless. HE got angry and said she was just a friend...then he left and told me to call him when I was feeling better. I didn't call him at all...and for the past month we haven't really contacted each other at all, except for a few times where he called me and I didn't return his calls. Just recently, he sent me an email telling me how much he missed me and how he regrets screwing things up. He said that he just gave me all that space because he thought he was scaring me away and that he wishes he knew how I felt about us. We did see quite a bit of each other throughout the summer but this just doesn't make sense to me because I never asked for space. In fact, I was hoping we could get even more serious since I felt so comfortable with him. Now I just can't pick up the phone and call him because I feel like I don't even know him anymore. Back in the summer, he couldn't go a weekend without talking to me, and now even though he says he misses me, I feel like if I ever got serious with him he would just bail on me out of the blue. I want him more than ever now, all this time has made me realize how important he was to me, even though I'm not showing it right now. I just don't want to get hurt. I'm miserable, if any of you can give me some insight on this I'd really appreciate it.

[SoleMate]

If ever a situation called for communication - this is it. Pick up the phone and tell him:

 

* That you miss him too

* That you wish you hadn't blasted him for text messaging another girl

* That you would love to start seeing him again

* That you plan to communicate better in the future

 

There is no ironclad guarantee against getting hurt, but I think the above plan puts you in a good situation.

[chicothechimp]

I agree with SoleMate... GOOD ADVICE

 

... seize the opportunity while it is still there!

 

 

 

 

Chico

[That_girl]

Thanks for the advice guys...I was thinking of calling him up and telling him that, if only I can muster up the courage!

[HokeyReligions]

SoleMate said it best. I echo her advice. Take a deep breath, pick up the phone and call him.

[That_girl]

Really guys, that was great advice....but for some reason it's been over a week and I still can't pick up that damn phone and call him! I feel like if I call him and tell him how miserable I am, he'll only take advantage of that and hurt me even more. I'm also feeling that this whole break had nothing to do with me...rather, it was all about him. He's the one who needed space, and now that's he realized how much he misses me, he's crawling back and making it seem as though it was me he was concerned about needing space. I don't know what to do.....should I just forget him?

[Scott S]

Originally posted by That_girl

I don't know what to do.....should I just forget him?

 

OK, you feel this, & feel that. But what do you actually KNOW?

 

Have you considered the possibility that he's as miserable as you are, he's been trying to reach out to you, and that the continued NC only confirms his beliefs/fears?

 

The consensus here is that you have had a serious communication break-down. Now you have hurt feelings aggravating this further.

 

It's not going to get better by itself. If you want him back, you'll need to extend the proverbial olive branch & call him. If need be, have one of your friends with you for moral support. Whatever.