Doggity Posted July 26, 2013 Posted July 26, 2013 I am new to posting, but not new to this site, been following it for a awhile now, seems like everyone here has good opinions and advice. Maybe some of you can help me out I dunno how to start this out, sorry if I just jump over details, if I do, just ask. This October I will be married for 5 years, in the relationship for 7. My wife has an 11 yr girl, and together we have a 16 month old boy. We have hit a point in our lives that it might be ending. I've seen it for awhile, but now I think it might be the moment of truth. Since our son was born, our relationship been a steady decline, even before that it started too decline, but not a noticeable until now. Her "love sign" in our relationship is doing things for her, cleaning house; dishes; laundry, ect. Mine is showing me affection, hugs; kisses, whatever. At first it was about sex, that i dont touch her, and not doing it enough. Then it's me not doing it enough around the house, now, I just don't know what it is. We don't talk anymore, all I want from her now is to talk to me, tell me about her day, ect. I'm tired of always opening the lines of communication, or always tryin to "fix" whatever is going on, she won't admit or even try to work on the problems, and it has drained me so badly, that I feel that everything is always my fault. Last weekend I purposely ignored her, then when she screamed at me I told her "it sucks to feel ignored, don't it?" She told me then she wanted to end it, I told her that she don't even talk to me, and that her communication sucks. I'm suffering from depression, and been in therapy for 9-10 months. I blame a lot from our relationship, I work 3rd shift, with weekends involved. I have a high responsibility job, that I can't just walk away from. I've tried to get her to goto a marriage counselor, but she won't go. Another sad thing is, she's got a masters in social work, and she's really good at it, but I fear she won't use her practice at home. I feel like I tried a lot to get through to her, and I just want to give up. Only thing really holding me back, is my son, I live him to death, I would do anything for him. I'm looking at apartments today, and if I found one, then I'll have THE talk with her tonight, There's more details, but that is the general problem, so as it says in the title… To seperate or not to seperate?
Yasuandio Posted July 26, 2013 Posted July 26, 2013 Once u do a rea separation, you are sort of on the way to divorce. Let me propose an idea, being that there doesn't seem to be any huge problem like infidelity. What about getting away for a few days? I used to do that - it helped clear my head. I checked into the one-week temporary stay motel, that has a kitchen and everything, about $175 for the week. I would bring my computer and play vidio gaming, and have all the wine and ciggarettes I wanted with no one looking down their nose at me. I had the fridge filled with frozen junk food, cause the little place had a microwave - it was kinda like a vacation. One season, it was Rainey while I was there, and there were all kinds of strange frogs hanging around the area, especially at nite time. I guess there was a creek nearby, somewhere by the motel, as it was out of the way. I started catching the frogs, and made little cages for them out of the frozen food boxes. I had about 20 different types of frond collected and living in the bathroom shower by the end of the week. I brought them home for our large pond in the back yard, they are still living there. Sometimes it helps to just get away without calling it a separation. Try it. Go frogging, or go fishing. It might help clear you head - and things might not seem so bad. Yas
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