jonnykino Posted July 26, 2013 Posted July 26, 2013 (edited) Back in November, this girl really liked me. We started going out - but as we were both students, we were both quite poor so never really went on dates. Used to go to her house and watch films etc. We're both Christian, and she asked if I'd ever done anything with a girl before. I lied. When she found out, she wasn't happy, but then she wanted us to do 'things'. We did, and our relationship became us doing a lot of stuff. She told me she loved me twice and I wasn't ready to say it back - she felt rejected. We went out till the end of December when she stated that she was disgusted by what we had done, and we were more like 'friends'. We got back together soon afterwards but after a few more weeks she ended it again. A week after she goes on a few dates with her friends friend, then she starts dating someone else. I tell her how I feel towards her and she rejects it, says it's too late. I write a letter, no dice. Eventually I tell her am moving on and then she tell me she loves me and we do stuff again. The next day she wants to sleep with me, but then her, and my faith say no, and she ends it. Some drama happens with some girl who I go on a date with who starts emailing my ex. Things become difficult with my ex. I end it with the other girl, I also have some drama with my brother, which she helps me out with, but it brings back memories of her past and she really dislikes me. A few weeks later she starts seeing her best guy-friend, and soon they go back to being just friends. We were texting - sort of - but it was more me apologising all the time and trying to fix things, but it just pushed her away more. Another girl I'm seeing contacts her and all hell breaks loose. We go on a night out with some friends, I get drunk and bring up the 'stuff' we've done, after she'd asked to be friends. She hates me again, and then drama with our group of friends starts to make her have panic attacks. She blames me, and tells me she's seeing ANOTHER guy. They then start dating. Her boyfriend starts emailing things to people about her, and she asks me for help. I get too involved and pushed her away. Last week a mutual friend said that her and her boyfriend has split up - thought I'm not sure yet. I haven't spoken to my ex since early June at all after we were arguing. In fact a girl I was dating contributed since my ex was giving me abuse, so she decided to text me ex - which again didn't help things. I ended it with the other girl and haven't been with anyone since. My ex said she was getting a new phone number and wouldn't be giving me it, to which I agreed would be the best idea, though, I emailed her just after wishing her a safe flight as she was going abroad for 3 months. She replied and gave me her number - though I didn't ask for it. I haven't spoken to her at all since then, and apparently she's come home early. She's gone to an event week - which her 'supposed ex boyfriend' is at, so I don't know what will happen there, but I need to know... is there a chance - even though all this is terribly unhealthy - that I could somehow win back my ex? I want it to start again properly, where I treated her to dates, and we don't just resort to doing things. This has only started in the past couple of weeks, and I don't know why. I hated her last month. Now I just want a second chance with her to make amends. My problem is though I don't know if she could ever feel like she did for me, whether she'd go out with an ex, or whether a relationship is possible due to our family and friends turning against each of us. If there's a way to do this, to make it work, please let me know. I don't know what it is about her, but I want a proper go at things with her, but I'm losing hope right now. I know we've both said and done stuff to hurt each other, but I wanna put that in the past and start afresh, if possible. Also, she hates being single. She's had a lot of trouble in her past to contribute to this, but this is why she moves on from one relationship to the next. Like I said, she's at some event, and her 'ex boyfriend' is there too, but if they have split up and she doesn't want to get back with him, she's most likely be looking for someone else. I know this is a flaw in her character, but I guess I just want one last shot with her, somehow. Thanks, and sorry for this being so long. Edited July 26, 2013 by jonnykino
Philosoraptor Posted July 26, 2013 Posted July 26, 2013 She seems to rebound and be pretty codependant. Things also seem very unstable and quick to jump around. If you get another chance with her she is likely to bounce again as this is her character, nothing you can do to change it. She needs to make that change herself for her ever to have a successful and healthy relationship.
Author jonnykino Posted July 26, 2013 Author Posted July 26, 2013 Yeah I get that, but at the same time, she's the only girl I've ever genuinely felt like something 'proper' could happen with, and I know I did stupid stuff and acted like an idiot, but I want her to somehow feel the way she did about me originally, and to try again properly - but I don't know if I can, or if it's possible. The time I was with her it was such a good relationship, we got on so well - then it just turned without explanation.
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