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Normal for a guy to have no interest in beers, bars nor random sex?

historylover

By historylover
in General Relationship Discussion

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historylover New Member

historylover

Posted
Posted

I'm not sure if this is common but I feel so different from some of my friends. I'm a 20 year-old guy that never liked bars, clubs, beers nor casual sex.

 

I don't even like their ''So bro, yesterday I scored this bish'' conversation.:sick: I don't like none of their actitivies and sometimes they keep on wanting to me join their lifestyle.

 

I've been going out on about 8 dates with this girl from my college but no sex yet. I just feel this is something so personal/intimate that I just don't give it to a disgusting STD carrier at a bar that won't even remember me. I'm just not ready yet and want to make sure it's the girl I want to commit for life.

 

My favorite actitivies are reading books, joining both science and foreign language clubs, talk with people I can have an intelligent conversation, not the idiot ''So what girl did you banged last night'' and travel through historical hence my sn historylover.

 

I guess I must be different or I'm I really the ''weird species'' as some friends are telling me. They keep commenting how it's sad I'm missing out so much in life.

  • Like 3
ForeverAlone28 Member

ForeverAlone28

Posted
Posted

I have the same problem with my friends and I'm a girl.

 

I'm a Christian girl and I also read a lot of history books, I'll let you guess which one in particular...

 

I haven't had sex yet because I am waiting for my life partner. Sex bonds you physically, mentally, emotionally, as well as spiritually. It's not something I want to just give to anybody.

 

Nowadays, our culture seems to have shifted from chivalry, good guys and good girls, to parties and beer. It's really, really sad.

 

Women especially have gone off the deep end.

 

I just recently ended a few friendships because I couldn't handle them anymore. My friends will sleep with 5 different guys and just be "okay" with it. Then come crying to me when it "doesn't work out" or the guy turns into a "jerk". I'm like, you did it to yourself.

 

I don't actually say that, but I have said some pretty harsh things because I cannot handle it.

 

I wish there were more guys like you in this world, in this day and age, but until I meet one, I will keep pushing on.

 

Good luck with that girl you are dating! :)

T3h L337 d00d Established Member

T3h L337 d00d

Posted
Posted

Colleges often promote this kind of degenerate behavior but no there is nothing good about it. You should find yourself some new friends before you waste your life away around idiots like you've just described.

Carenth Established Member

Carenth

Posted
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Not unusual. I've never been a party animal. I don't like bars or clubs (loud and obnoxious places in my opinion). I'm not a fan of drinking, I have the occasional drink on special occasions but that is it. I have zero interest in sex with strangers.

 

I'm not religious this is just how I am, never have been never will be. I much prefer to have a quiet dinner or get together with a few close friends and discuss many different topics from politics, emerging trends in various fields, relationships etc.

 

I would say a good part of it has to do with that I'm quite introverted. I enjoy my time alone. I am sociable however I can only do it for so long before feeling mentally drained (especially in larger groups).

 

Basically it boils down to different strokes for different folks. You are not missing out on life if the idea of guzzling down a dozen beers and having drunk sex with a random stranger you met less than 30 minutes ago doesn't appeal to you. If you are happy living your life the way you are then power to you. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

  • Like 5
Archanaart Established Member

Archanaart

Posted
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Those types of behaviors are all stereotypes constructed by society.

 

Be different

 

Any guys out there that knows what "bish" means?

Sidz Member

Sidz

Posted
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I think it's still "normal," as in you're not a maladjusted person for wanting to be sexually committed to one person.

 

The thing about having sex with many partners is that you are "missing out" on having only one partner for life, so that argument cuts both ways. You either miss out on promiscuity or true commitment, in that you are committed to your wife before you even know her. I made it to 26 and gave away my virginity, having felt like I was wasting my 20s.

 

I hope you find the fairy tale. I have many friends that have.

Radu Established Member

Radu

Posted
Posted

While i don't fully agree with your views on sex [i don't like ONS, but i have no problem with no strings attached sex], i have felt like a fish out of water in regards to what you wrote.

 

My advice is to do you own thing, and remember that college is for studying ... which is something i wish i had remembered when i was your age [wasted time in other ways].

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historylover New Member

historylover

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Thank for your opinions. I definitely don't see myself missing out in life. I don't need hookers to bring me experience. You can learn when you're with the person you want to commit. I don't see what is really the rush. They are acting as if it was an eating contest or something.

 

ForeverAlone28, you will find him. Just remember, if they try to push for sex so early then he's not the one. Funny, I had this same thing happening to me vice-versa. When I didn't push for sex nor anything after a couple dates, she dumped me and according to others thought there was something wrong with me because of not wanting sex nor any deeper physical contact besides holding hands. Another I walked away from a girl that only wanted my virginity (I was surprised there are girls like that out there; needless to say I found it very creepy). It's equally just as hard for us as it's for you finding a respectable girl. Good look in your search.

Babolat Established Member

Babolat

Posted
Posted
I'm not sure if this is common but I feel so different from some of my friends. I'm a 20 year-old guy that never liked bars, clubs, beers nor casual sex.

 

I don't even like their ''So bro, yesterday I scored this bish'' conversation.:sick: I don't like none of their actitivies and sometimes they keep on wanting to me join their lifestyle.

 

I've been going out on about 8 dates with this girl from my college but no sex yet. I just feel this is something so personal/intimate that I just don't give it to a disgusting STD carrier at a bar that won't even remember me. I'm just not ready yet and want to make sure it's the girl I want to commit for life.

 

My favorite actitivies are reading books, joining both science and foreign language clubs, talk with people I can have an intelligent conversation, not the idiot ''So what girl did you banged last night'' and travel through historical hence my sn historylover.

 

I guess I must be different or I'm I really the ''weird species'' as some friends are telling me. They keep commenting how it's sad I'm missing out so much in life.

 

I am in my mid 40s and have felt different most of my life. I like to go to a bar or a club, or see a local band from time to time, not every weekend though. I like to have a couple of drinks, though not get drunk. I like to get a little crazy from time to time though within responsible limits.

 

I have never had a ONS, don't have meaningless sex.

 

Most of my male friends love to hit the bars and chase woman. It has taking me a while to say No, and just stay home. alone.

  • Like 1
Els Established Member

Els

Posted
Posted

You're certainly 'normal', though perhaps not the majority in your demographic. But meh, the majority is overrated, except when it comes to politics. :laugh:

 

The bf and I don't enjoy clubs or random sex either; we do go to bars sometimes if friends want to meet up there or for the occasional drink, but it's not a regular occurrence. We're in our mid-twenties now, but we've been together since we were close to your age and were the same back then.

 

We also have friends who are quite similar to us. I'm sure there will be other such likeminded people in your area, if you look around.

 

Be proud to be who you are. :)

  • Author
historylover New Member

historylover

Posted
  • Author
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Any guys out there that knows what "bish" means?
It means b**** but that's how they say it.
MissBee Established Member

MissBee

Posted
Posted

No, lots of guys are like you.

Seductive Established Member

Seductive

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You're normal. You just don't fit the stereotype. Not everyone is the same.

unluckycat Member

unluckycat

Posted
Posted

Perfectly normal, in fact, the good kind imo. I actually broke up with someone when he went to college because he was such a "bro" type, drinking, partying, and never calling.

 

The next person I was with after him was like you, didn't like drinking, partying, and was a very nice and didn't take things too far if they didn't need to be. So good on you!

supaflyz Established Member

supaflyz

Posted
Posted

The only time I drink beer is when I'm out with friends at a club or barbecue. The only time I go to the club/bar is after a breakup. Not to meet new women, but just kind of get away from the loneliness. I did get some girls number. HOwever, the only thing I could think of was my ex. That is the only time I drink beer. Random sex= high probability of an STD.

 

 

I'm not sure if this is common but I feel so different from some of my friends. I'm a 20 year-old guy that never liked bars, clubs, beers nor casual sex.

 

I don't even like their ''So bro, yesterday I scored this bish'' conversation.:sick: I don't like none of their actitivies and sometimes they keep on wanting to me join their lifestyle.

 

I've been going out on about 8 dates with this girl from my college but no sex yet. I just feel this is something so personal/intimate that I just don't give it to a disgusting STD carrier at a bar that won't even remember me. I'm just not ready yet and want to make sure it's the girl I want to commit for life.

 

My favorite actitivies are reading books, joining both science and foreign language clubs, talk with people I can have an intelligent conversation, not the idiot ''So what girl did you banged last night'' and travel through historical hence my sn historylover.

 

I guess I must be different or I'm I really the ''weird species'' as some friends are telling me. They keep commenting how it's sad I'm missing out so much in life.

RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
Posted
Thank for your opinions. I definitely don't see myself missing out in life. I don't need hookers to bring me experience. You can learn when you're with the person you want to commit. I don't see what is really the rush. They are acting as if it was an eating contest or something.

 

 

This made me laugh. I'm having images of people trying shove three hamburgers in their mouth simultaneously, while drinking a glass of water and doing their best to avoid throwing it all up afterwards.

 

You are not missing out on your life at all.. You are building your life on a solid foundation.

 

My recommendation is to stay away from people who talk and act in ways that are not consistent with your values. Just follow your interests and you will find like minded people.

 

Don't miss an opportunity to befriend older people and maybe try volunteer work as well. They have experience and you will see (like I have) the value of a commitment.

  • Like 1
ThaWholigan Established Member

ThaWholigan

Posted
Posted

Dude - perfectly normal. Perhaps your demographic is of a particular kind - expanding it should help you.

 

Depending on what you want out of life, you're doing fine :).

  • Like 3
Babolat Established Member

Babolat

Posted
Posted

I met one of my female friends out last night to watch a local band and dance. She brought a gf with her who was from out of town. We danced and danced and had a blast. I think we each had 2 drinks each over 5 hours.

 

I can't do this every weekend, but we had a lot of fun with very little alcohol. If you know my history with my last gf, this night almost felt strange as I kept expecting them to want to drink more and more......but they did not, and it was nice!

 

You are normal, and you are the kind of person I would like to hang out with!

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