Titania22 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 I am thinking of sending this text I can't have someone like you in my life anymore. I don't want to waste myself on disingenuous people. Please leave me alone, I would appreciate that. Is that ok or should I just go NC? Send the text if you want to, and I suggest turning off your phone when you go to bed, so you don't pick up when you are half asleep.
forgetmenot75 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Kizza: you are his second option. you'll never be his first option. Remember this because at some point you'll understand why. Guys don't like doormats. you are a doormat right now. While he's at nightclubs, having fun, kissing other girls, sleeping with other girls, you are still open to talk (???) I honestly don't know what you want to talk with him. It's pretty clear he's playing games with you, and that he doesn't care a sh**. You need to stop contact. You need to put limits. you need to love yourself more. At this time you're only a doormat for him, and you'll continue to be seeing this way until you cut with his games. 2
Simon Phoenix Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Girl, you need to get a clue and you need to get a clue quickly. You have deluded yourself stupid at this point. STOP COMMUNICATING WITH THIS GUY! And stop trying to figure out why he's doing what he's doing. It doesn't matter. What does matter is that he's messing with you and showing no respect to you. No reason is legitimate, so stop trying to figure it out. You can't figure out how to control yourself from talking to him, you aren't going to crack the rest of the case. I know this is harsh but damn, come on! 2
Author Kizza Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 Girl, you need to get a clue and you need to get a clue quickly. You have deluded yourself stupid at this point. STOP COMMUNICATING WITH THIS GUY! And stop trying to figure out why he's doing what he's doing. It doesn't matter. What does matter is that he's messing with you and showing no respect to you. No reason is legitimate, so stop trying to figure it out. You can't figure out how to control yourself from talking to him, you aren't going to crack the rest of the case. I know this is harsh but damn, come on! I need harsh right now. I am an idiot. No amount of activities and distraction will stop me from knowing this. This is so hard to take, the whole situation. :( I am finding it hard to function, I don't think if it is even that I lost him...I never had him...it's that I have been so stupid and I have to live with myself after all this. I feel like he is laughing at me, I feel low and silly and I hate the person this has made me. I was in a 7 yr relationship before this. I have never had anyone do this to me ever before. I am having difficulty processing it all. I am looking forward to the part where this is in the past....
Simon Phoenix Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 I need harsh right now. I am an idiot. No amount of activities and distraction will stop me from knowing this. This is so hard to take, the whole situation. :( I am finding it hard to function, I don't think if it is even that I lost him...I never had him...it's that I have been so stupid and I have to live with myself after all this. I feel like he is laughing at me, I feel low and silly and I hate the person this has made me. I was in a 7 yr relationship before this. I have never had anyone do this to me ever before. I am having difficulty processing it all. I am looking forward to the part where this is in the past.... Crap happens. Don't worry about what he's doing or what he thinks -- that's part of why you are in this mess in the first place. So you dated a douchebag -- big deal. Part of living and growing. It reflects worse on him than it does on you, unless you let it continue to defeat you. Don't do that. 2
The Way I Am Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Don't bother sending him another text. You already pretty much said everything already in your last exchange. There's nothing new to add. If he cared at all, he would have talked to you when he said he would. Ignore him. Just keep yourself busy and any time you feel like texting him or answering his call, remind yourself of how sh*tty he's been. 1
kassy Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Hey, he's not a nice guy. But just learn the lesson and move on. Don't beat yourself up over it. So you made a mistake. That's life. Who cares if he laughs at you? Who cares about him at all? You should value his opinion as much as mine... Some random person you never met and never will. How he has acted is out of your control. Now you know you need to set boundaries in relationships and bail when big red flags appear. One day you will look back and laugh. So end it. Never talk to him again and move on. Go out and have some fun. Just enjoy things for a while and when you want to go back to dating, assuming the best of men unless they give you reason not to. Learn from this that you need to be more objective in your assessments of situations, not that all men are horrible and can't be trusted. Everyone makes mistakes, errors in judgement. It's not the mistakes that matter so much, but the ability to learn from them and avoid repeating them. Show me a successful person who never messed up... Yeah they don't exist. Most successful people have made many mistakes. So choose to be successful. My pep talk for the day done ha 1
Author Kizza Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 Thank-you for your support ... I appreciate it. I appreciate being told from an outside perspective even if it is not sugar coated. It is hard when you are in the hole you know? I am going to refrain from saying anything. He might get satisfaction or laugh at me for anything I say! I don't want him to know how much his actions have affected me. Like you said, he won't care so what's the point I am flying out of this stupid town in 2 days and a long weekend in another country should somewhat help I hope.
kassy Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Go and enjoy the time away and just have some fun! Sounds like great timing
MissBee Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 "hey... I did get your texts and please don't apologise...You do nothing wrong. The spare times now when I am not training, working or eating is spent sleeping. I am sorry. The only free time I have is on weekends and my intentions is to see you most of the time but I fall asleep...." Fall asleep wtf!! I need something short, clever and to the point. Because I deserve more!!!! Please help and thank-you!! This guy isn't that into you. I had a guy do that to me once. He's full of it and I would simply say " I wish you well with your narcolepsy, I do, but this isn't working for me, so I'm moving on." 1
forgetmenot75 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Exactly, how come he falls asleep all the time? :laugh: Kissa: forget about this idiot, and PLEASE, DONT CONTACT HIM NEVER AGAIN.
Author Kizza Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 This guy isn't that into you. I had a guy do that to me once. He's full of it and I would simply say " I wish you well with your narcolepsy, I do, but this isn't working for me, so I'm moving on." That is a very good response...
The Way I Am Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Thank-you for your support ... I appreciate it. I appreciate being told from an outside perspective even if it is not sugar coated. It is hard when you are in the hole you know? Unfortunately, I do know. Learned about a-holes like this the hard way. I am flying out of this stupid town in 2 days and a long weekend in another country should somewhat help I hope. Sounds fun. Hope you have a good time. 1
Author Kizza Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 Thank-you... I am going to do my best to have a good time. I am travelling alone so plenty of time to get to know myself again and self reflect a little bit in a new environment. Hopefully I come home a little "lighter" I just hope now that he leaves me alone.
MidwestUSA Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Enjoy your trip! Look, if you need to focus on one thing, remember the night he was drunk and said ILY, what, fifteen times? Who needs that - someone who gets drunk, throws ILY around, and can't remember it! You're intelligent, witty and sensitive. You deserve better! 1
Author Kizza Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 Enjoy your trip! Look, if you need to focus on one thing, remember the night he was drunk and said ILY, what, fifteen times? Who needs that - someone who gets drunk, throws ILY around, and can't remember it! You're intelligent, witty and sensitive. You deserve better! Thank-you! I will remember this! I do deserve better. He has gone to the island. There is an island my friend told me about where all the awful men in their lives go. He is there now. I am going to have a great weekend and then I will come home, make a clean start and get on with my life. I will chalk this up to my first experience of the 'player' .... learn the lesson, remember the red flags and move on. All the people that grace our lives teach us lessons... constantly.. and quite often it is the most awful (enemies) that teach us the most valuable lessons. Now I know... it will take time but I will move on and find the right person and when I do... I will know it Right now it is ****in hard but I got myself into this situation and now I have to deal with it. Will there be more heart angst/confused/soul searching posts on LS? More than likely! I am glad I found this community because after my 7 yr breakup and the subsequent mess about with this guy I think I am going to need this as I continue looking for the right one. 1
Recommended Posts