smithfield Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 I started using a dating website recently and have been on a few dates which have been fun and interesting and overall fairly enjoyable. About 3 weeks ago I began messaging this girl online. We seemed to have similar interests and seemed compatible via our messages so I asked her if she would like to meet up sometime. She readily agreed and we met for coffee a few days later. Chatting to her online went well but I never fathomed how beautiful, witty and intelligent she was until I met her for coffee. We talked for two hours and I felt that we really hit it off, we made each other laugh and we had a really decent intellectual conversation, not the kind of woman you could randomly meet in a nightclub. At the end of the date I asked her would she like to go for a drink some evening and she replied that she would love too. I messaged her a few days later and we arranged to meet up in a few days. So one evening last week we met at a bar and once again we really hit it off. The conversation was flowing between us, and we talked about a wide variety of topics that we both had an interest in. Here is where my trouble starts! After 4 hours we had to finish up because the bar staff were eager to go home! I walked her to the top of her street and we stood there talking for a few more minutes. As I was about to say goodnight I leaned in and tried to kiss her. However, she turned her face slightly, most likely because she was expecting a kiss on the cheek so I kind of kissed half her lips/cheek. She didn't push me off but she didn't kiss me back either. Instead she gave me a rather deep hug. I was feeling very awkward at this point and felt that I had made an idiot of myself and possibly embarrassed her too. I did manage to ask her if she would like to go for a drink another evening and she did say yes but I was so red in the face at that stage I didn't catch the tone of her response. She is out of the country for two weeks so I messaged her two days later saying how I really enjoyed the evening and when she is back from her holiday to let me know if she wants to meet for another drink. I haven't got a response yet. But I'm having serious self doubts about whether she likes me or not. Does a girl spend fours hours talking to you on a date if she doesn't like you? Or is it she wasn't expecting me to try and kiss her and felt a little awkward? She isn't just any other girl that I've gone on a date with either, I really do like her a lot and I'm very eager to see her again but I'm just not sure the feelings are mutual. What do people think?
BluEyeL Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 She definitely likes you Continue to ask her out. Next time, ask her "may i kiss you?" before you attempt, so there is no confusion. Maybe she didn't expect the kiss or is a little shy. 1
Philosoraptor Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 Sounds like she likes you enough or else she wouldn't have said yes. She didn't respond because you made a statement, didn't ask a question. She's out of the country probably enjoying the local sights. Be patient and ding her again once you know she's back. 1
Woop1337 Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 She's not that into you, for the sole reason she turned her head away when you kissed her. When she gets back, show her a great time and kiss her again at the end of the night.
tbf Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 Without being able to read her non-verbal clues, it's difficult to say whether she's into you or not. If she's into you, she'll respond. If not, she'll fade. 1
Divasu Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 She's not that into you, for the sole reason she turned her head away when you kissed her. When she gets back, show her a great time and kiss her again at the end of the night. That doesn't always mean anything. She may have just been caught off guard. I've done something similar before, it was an awkward hug as we were saying our goodbyes and on the next date, I was the one going in for the kiss.
shexy Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 I think the kiss block means no, she's not really into you. What woman in her right mind would turn away if a guy she's really into tried to kiss her? 1
Author smithfield Posted July 23, 2013 Author Posted July 23, 2013 Thanks for the responses guys. I'm still very confused and not sure what to make of it all. To make matters worse I can't stop thinking about her!
Skyraider829 Posted July 27, 2013 Posted July 27, 2013 I am NO expert at this, but I second the notion from the others saying that maybe she just wasn't expecting that little peck you gave her. I mean, if it was just your second date, that could have possibly been a bit too much. Not in a "bad" way, but just not quite appropriate - yet. She must like you, otherwise, there wouldn't be that much conversation going on between you two. Unless she were shy, than that is another story and a totally different type of person to deal with and read signals from. I presume that from the fact the she gave you - as you put it, a "deep hug" that she definitely has reciprocal feelings. Its just that maybe the kissing part of it should wait a bit, wait for a more evident signal from her that she may want one, then give it another shot. If she was flat-out not interested, she wouldn't have hugged you, at least I wouldn't take it that way. But it is slightly difficult since you know, its rather subjective. You can only read the cues people give you, not what's going on in their heads. Keep up on her though, just let her sort of suggest if she wants a kiss. I think that would be most polite.
BradJacobs Posted July 27, 2013 Posted July 27, 2013 To make matters worse I can't stop thinking about her! You have two weeks before she even returns and additional time for her to respond (if she does) and set up the next date (if she's interested). Go on dates with others. It's way too early to put all of your eggs in one basket.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 27, 2013 Posted July 27, 2013 Never date someone who tells you they're going on vacation or out of the country. Those people who are busy planning for a trip typically do not have the time to invest in another person, they're too self-involved with everything else in their lives to focus on meeting someone on the same page. Rather, you'd just became a time-filler for them before they jet off to Hawaii or Rome.
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