xilver Posted July 23, 2013 Posted July 23, 2013 Wow...pretty zen. I'll raise your zen with a metaphor. And I'm not trying to be an asshat either. But, here's the deal. If he was standing on some railroad tracks and you see a train speeding towards him, would you warn him that a train was coming or would you grab a lawn chair and a tub of popcorn and watch him learn from the experience through his pain? Now, he's on a forum where a lot of folks have survived train wrecks and I'm not blind to the fact that this is an advice forum and he is free to do what he wants. All I'm saying is: Dude, trains coming....... You can yell all you want, but if he can hear you then I guarantee he can also hear the train. And if he doesn't understand what a train can do to him then he will stand on the tracks and die. More than likely he will step off the tracks before that happens. There is also the possibility that the train will stop and he hijacks it.
Author nerdlingZA Posted July 25, 2013 Author Posted July 25, 2013 Not replying might look petty. Reply. But make it one sentence. Wait at least a week or so before replying. Don't reveal anything to her. Literally: "Hey. Nice to hear from you. Hope you are well." No questions. Nothing for her to respond to. This could be a stock message inside a greetings card. That's it. Any more messages after that then don't respond. You've done enough to be civil and be the bigger person. Is they any words I can replace with "nice to hear from you"
HobGadling Posted July 25, 2013 Posted July 25, 2013 The point is to make it as non-committal as possible. Just very generalized. Hey. Hope you are well. Take care.
Author nerdlingZA Posted July 30, 2013 Author Posted July 30, 2013 Okay guys I posted here 4 or 5 days ago asking if I should reply to my Ex text "how you doing" most of url said don't reply , I didn't. I was feeling good up untill today we had a 5 second Eye-Contact moment , now this made me sad & tempted to reply her mail , I wanna reply with "I'm cool , I saw you today you need to go to the gym , take care" should I ? The "going to the gym part" will make her relise she's nolonger attractive to me
Balzac Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Dude / scorched earth is not what you seek long term. Bite your tongue and fingertips. No and No.
forgetmenot75 Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 No. Why do you want to be so nasty with her? You are implying she is fat, and you'll be acting like a shallow and immature person advising her to go the gym. It's understandable you're hurt and sad, but you need to focus in something else. Keep no contact and move in with your life.
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Not only does that make you look sad and pretty pathetic, that IS sad and pathetic. I hope you're better than that. 3
bentleychic Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 Heck no. People generally have a bad enough self image without someone (that they once possibly loved, even worse!) adding a negative inner dialog to their heads when they look in the mirror. DON'T DO IT.
Own Worst Enemy Posted July 30, 2013 Posted July 30, 2013 You don't want to send this message. Go to the gym yourself, feel good, and eventually that will turn to happiness. You'll be v glad you didn't do it. If you were being accurate, just be glad she is less hot and leave it there. Stay classy! 1
fujidabruin Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 No dude, even if you are bitter and think she wants to see you hurting, go NC. Get passed it and work on yourself without thoughts of her. Then later if she sees you confident, happy, and indifferent she might know she lost. But, by then it will not even matter to you.
reddragon588 Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 Please don't do this. Have more respect for yourself.
Lani Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 I have to admit that made me laugh But everyone is right, don't do it.
Inviv_girl Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 Okay guys I posted here 4 or 5 days ago asking if I should reply to my Ex text "how you doing" most of url said don't reply , I didn't. I was feeling good up untill today we had a 5 second Eye-Contact moment , now this made me sad & tempted to reply her mail , I wanna reply with "I'm cool , I saw you today you need to go to the gym , take care" should I ? The "going to the gym part" will make her relise she's nolonger attractive to me The gym part really make me laugh Nah, you better off.. I know it's tempting but lol you should have better life without that fatty 1
emi Posted July 31, 2013 Posted July 31, 2013 did she dump u badly? O_O if yes then no, if she politely give u a reasonable explanation and respect you, an answer wont hurt, but u dont need to mention the gym part. just say im fine, thanks!
Author nerdlingZA Posted August 2, 2013 Author Posted August 2, 2013 Oh well guys I broke up with my Ex in january , she left me for another man ... I continued contact her (calling her everyday) for 2months hoping she would give me another chance , whenever I used to see her at our workplace she would refuse to give me a hug , or if we were passing each other she would distance her direction from me , she didn't even want me to hold her hand , now Today I saw her talking to my fwnd & they both looked at me (I knew they were twking abt me) I approach them & I started kissing my Ex on the cheeks , she said nothing , I hold her hand (like couples do) she said nothing , what does this mean ? Or should I just ignore the fact that she reacted differently ?
Confused_Soul_23 Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 by "workplace" do you mean school? Haha this sounds absurd. I don't even talk to or see my ex! 1
Misfortune Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 You really went up to her with no prior talks about it and did what you felt like?
Author nerdlingZA Posted August 2, 2013 Author Posted August 2, 2013 by "workplace" do you mean school? Haha this sounds absurd. I don't even talk to or see my ex! Lol yeah I mean school ? How did u know 1
Author nerdlingZA Posted August 2, 2013 Author Posted August 2, 2013 You really went up to her with no prior talks about it and did what you felt like? Yes I just went there & hold her hand & kissed her cheeks & she giggled
Misfortune Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 And this was after 2 months of everyday calling? How did those calls go? Where's said other man? After wearing people down, some ppl stop caring; could be pity. Good luck with that. Good call confused.
salem mark Posted August 2, 2013 Posted August 2, 2013 ok, this makes no sense, you broke up with her? no she left for another she broke up with you, she doesnt want you, hello!
Author nerdlingZA Posted August 2, 2013 Author Posted August 2, 2013 And this was after 2 months of everyday calling? How did those calls go? Where's said other man? After wearing people down, some ppl stop caring; could be pity. Good luck with that. Good call confused. Well the calls were "COOL" , & "GOOD" like somedays I would call her "hello MJ" she would say "YA" as I continue she would say "OK" "OH" , & some days I would call her "hello Mj" she wud say "hud" & as conversation continues she would laugh & sometimes we would speak some foreign laughs but in school she wouldn't want to be wear me , but now that I've applied NC(to heal myself) for 5months , she's starting to be more nicer at school
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