valedicere Posted July 21, 2013 Posted July 21, 2013 I'm going to try and shorten this part as much as possible. Alright so basically, I liked this girl for like the entire second semester, worked myself up all year thinking she liked me, not just because I want her to, but because she really acted like it. She's shy too, well, she's exactly like me acutally for the most part. Most of my shyness now is around the person I like. We barely talked too.. :/ Well.. last day I finally work up all of the confidence that I don't have and basically was like "do you like me?", probably not what I should've said but either way, same effect. She acted weird that day even before I asked her, she just was like not talking, staring into her iPod, etc. Well I go to ask her, she wouldn't even look at me but she said "no." Alright well several things I have to explain. 1) My parents don't wont me dating someone who isn't white, well she's Mexican. She knows that too, why? Well I kinda wrote her a note earlier in the year and I explained that as well as telling her I liked her even though she already knew. She never said anything about it to me though. But apparently she didn't think my note thing was weird though cause my friend said she asked her about it, well she said she was like "so I heard he wrote you something" and she said she smiled and they talked for a minute and stuff, she even said it was like she was interested in me.. 2) Apparently, her parents wont let her date until she is 18. (At least my friend who dated her older sister said that. ) She is 16, and I'm 17 by the way, we are like a year and half apart, nothing crazy. 3) My mom obviously knows nothing about this, but we were talking and something she said caught my attention. She said when she was younger a person she worked with tried to hook her up with her brother, well my mom was a lot like me also, didn't think anyone could ever like them, didn't view ourselves very highly, so when he came in and talked to her, she just ignored him, not because she didn't like him but because she thought it was a joke, even though it wasn't. I've tried giving up, its been like almost 2 months since that day I got "rejected". But I am much happier just wanting to give it another chance. I'm always like this, I don't like giving up on my feelings even if I know its going to drive me insane in the end. Should I hang on and hope for the best? I really still feel like, and not just because I want it, just because of everything that was said and done all year makes me really feel like she is my "other half", "soul-mate" whatever, me and her are like the same in very many ways. And like I've never had a girlfriend or anything, and I don't believe she's had a boyfriend.. I just.. I don't know. I really don't want to go back to feeling alone all over again. It makes me think, maybe she's just not ready? Its kinda scary to me too honestly. xD Sorry the post was so long, I suck at writing so this was as short as I could do it and get my point across.
Author valedicere Posted July 21, 2013 Author Posted July 21, 2013 But like I said. We never really talked too much. But we sat beside each other the entire semester. We constantly exchanged stares, my friend teased us both about it, she never acted like it was weird that I liked her, she acted very flattered by it if anything, she'd blush and everything... Maybe I was a little too hopeful but after 17 years of being alone I just cant stand not to get a bit hopeful for this. The thing is, there is no guarantee that we will ever get to talk again either, we had it perfect this year sitting next to each other. I might be building all this up again for nothing. At this point though I feel as if I have nothing left to lose since I had nothing to start with.
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