Jcishere1993 Posted July 20, 2013 Posted July 20, 2013 I'm 20 never had a gf. All the people make fun of my looks and alot of people reject me. I feel like a lower being. What do I do?
Nick D1980 Posted July 20, 2013 Posted July 20, 2013 Be more confident. I have/had confidence problem too but I'm learning. You ain't in high school anymore where the girls only care about the guys look. Hey I still think like that at times. If you think like that, go to the gym and work out. Maybe you'll meet a girl there too.
404namenotfound Posted July 20, 2013 Posted July 20, 2013 The other people are right that you shouldn't change you looks just to meet someone who only likes you for that reason. Totally agree with that. That said why not hit the gym and change your style? Fortunately your physical appearance is something you can change without too much effort and will make you feel better about yourself. It sounds like you aren't very confident, and chicks usually don't like that. It doesn't sound like you're a nasty person, and that's something you can't change.
pcplod Posted July 21, 2013 Posted July 21, 2013 I'm 20 never had a gf. All the people make fun of my looks and alot of people reject me. I feel like a lower being. What do I do? Why do people make fun of your looks? Frankly, if they just did it to amuse themselves or to make themselves feel better about themselves they are the sort of people to be given a very wide berth. Maybe it's time to reappraise the sort of people you hang around with and move upmarket, so-to-speak. Some people simply aren't worth spit. Try to remain calm and objective about the whole thing and not keep yourself in a permanent state of distress about it. Look at all the issues rationally, one by one, and think about how you are going to deal with them. It may be a long-term project and you may have to be patient with yourself, but you can do it, if you are determined enough and logical enough. The girlfriend thing? Don't try to deal with it as an issue in it's own right. Deal with yourself first and with both a bit of luck and a bit of careful focus, things hopefully will start happening for you, eventually. What do I do? To paraphrase a well-known saying; don't ask others to provide answers for you that can only come from within, start creating your own solutions to the problem. Stop being a victim. Only you can do it.
hppr Posted July 21, 2013 Posted July 21, 2013 Like the other guy said stop being a victim. If your friends are unreliable, unsupportive, get new ones. Buy new clothes, go to the gym, get some pimple cream, make yourself more attractive. That is what the 'hot' guys and girls do to look good. Also you will 'get confidence' by doing this. Job, education, this is prime time for that. I know it sucks watching the other guys go out and get girls while you sit on the sidelines but getting your life on track is the way to go right now. Also, there are probably things about you that you wish you could change (say your height, or the way your face looks or whatever) but you can't change them. So just quit worrying about them. 1
The Introvert Posted July 22, 2013 Posted July 22, 2013 We are in the same boat br, am 20 never had a gf or anything that resembles that and some people are now teasing me about that, but you know what, the teasing is actually propelling me to work on that! I have nothing to lose I have never had a gf and I don't know how it feels to have one so I NEVER crave badly to have one, get it.I suggest you learn to love yourself and be happy whilst you are single and free yet working it out to attract one.Good Luck!
Saraswati57 Posted July 24, 2013 Posted July 24, 2013 What exactly about your looks are people making fun of? Would it be something that you could change?
mercuryshadow Posted July 25, 2013 Posted July 25, 2013 People are targeting you because you allow them to access your weakness. I've been there! You're still so young... start standing up for yourself. It took me as long as you and then some to gain some confidence. I had to remove myself from the role of victim, and realize that I truly had control over it. You do, too, I promise. The best place to start is to rid your life of people who put you down and keep you in this role. They like to have you there because it makes them feel powerful and in control. It's an illusion, although one that they get off on. And so, start with ignoring them. Do not let their words penetrate your psyche. Start there. Find an activity that holds meaning to you. Volunteering for something you care about is a great way to boost your feeling of self-worth and it also gives you an opportunity to meet like-minded people.
hppr Posted July 27, 2013 Posted July 27, 2013 Getting new friends really helps. Your current friends are toxic, using you as a whipping boy etc. No bueno. Find some new people to hang out with. Be outgoing and assertive from the beginning. You may surprise yourself. 1
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