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Really struggling to forget commitment-phobic ex! Anyone else been with one?

Rachelmcandrew

By Rachelmcandrew
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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Rachelmcandrew Member

Rachelmcandrew

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Hi guys.

 

So I was with my commitment-phobe for only 6 months. Things followed the typical pattern - he came on really strong, won me over, and then dumped me. Not once but twice. The relationship ended for the second time around 3 months ago now and I'm really struggling to move on and forget him. He was intensely romantic, we connected on so many levels and he was my best friend for that short time, not to mention the sex was incredible.

 

I have been doing NC, but of course he pops up every so often with a completely random text message which throws me off and makes me angry/sad all over again. I still have crying spells because of this man and have been known to sit in my work bathroom for hours just sobbing because of his behaviour. In spite of everything he has done - keeping me a secret/pretending he was single, not introducing me to friends, refusing to add me on Facebook, flirting with other women the entire time he was with me, standing me up and flaking on plans and never being able to plan ahead, as well as dumping me twice, I still miss him a lot and wish things could be different. Just wanted to know if anyone has been through this and has any tips?

youngnlove89 Established Member

youngnlove89

Posted
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Read my threads. It will give you a sneak peek for what you are about to face if you stay with this guy.

 

Get out now will you still have a chance. Don't waste 2.5 years with these types of men like I did. You will regret it. It will get worse. He will keep coming back. But only you can control what really happens, only you can say "NO, I'm done with your games!"

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Rachelmcandrew Member

Rachelmcandrew

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Thanks Youngnlove. We are no longer together and I don't reply to him - I like to think I'm a smart girl and I was just temporarily blinded by love/lust. I wouldn't go back to him because I know it would never be different.

 

I'll have a little search for your posts and have a read.

forgetmenot75 Established Member

forgetmenot75

Posted
Posted

Hello,

 

You're not alone. Read my thread: "he's not replying anymore".

I was with someone for 6 months who never said he loved me, who never introduced me to friends, who was flake and forgot our dates, who flirted with other women online non stop while that time, who used me for sex( and I allowed him!)

 

Block him. I'm lucky he doesn't reach for me. Delete him, ignore him. He'll bring you only pain and more pain. These insecure men have no emphaty whatsoever, and couldn't care less about ones feelings. Run away and don't look back.

Allen101 Member

Allen101

Posted
Posted

DAMN exact situation as me except my ex was called rachel and she was the one doing all the things you mentioned.. Continue doing NC as that's the only way for you to move on and get better. And whenever you think of him or anything go do an activity or eat something that makes you happy it helps alot.

daftpunk Established Member

daftpunk

Posted
Posted
Hi guys.

 

So I was with my commitment-phobe for only 6 months. Things followed the typical pattern - he came on really strong, won me over, and then dumped me. Not once but twice. The relationship ended for the second time around 3 months ago now and I'm really struggling to move on and forget him. He was intensely romantic, we connected on so many levels and he was my best friend for that short time, not to mention the sex was incredible.

 

I have been doing NC, but of course he pops up every so often with a completely random text message which throws me off and makes me angry/sad all over again. I still have crying spells because of this man and have been known to sit in my work bathroom for hours just sobbing because of his behaviour. In spite of everything he has done - keeping me a secret/pretending he was single, not introducing me to friends, refusing to add me on Facebook, flirting with other women the entire time he was with me, standing me up and flaking on plans and never being able to plan ahead, as well as dumping me twice, I still miss him a lot and wish things could be different. Just wanted to know if anyone has been through this and has any tips?

 

You don't need any tips. You already know what to do.

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Rachelmcandrew Member

Rachelmcandrew

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You don't need any tips. You already know what to do.

 

it's hard though! I feel like getting over him is taking forever...

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