twinkie0 Posted July 18, 2013 Posted July 18, 2013 So I was dating this girl. Everything was great untill she started getting confused and saying she doesn't want to be in a relationship right now. I said alright, but said there's a difference between kinda putting our relationship on hold for a while and ending it. She said she doesn't want to keep me waiting and I said I have no problem with waiting, just as long as she realizes things could change and it could be too late. She said she'd problably regret it but she really really doesn't want to have anything right now because it's affecting her. So I said there's no use in being all stressed out about us like that. She said she couldn't help it (and I don't blame her because I felt like that for a long time). So basically we decided to pretty much end it for now. And I know for a fact that whatever's going on with her is temporary because she simply isn't like that. So I'm thinking of not not seeing her for a while, give her some space, and I'm pretty sure she'll be back to normal in about a month, when we're back in college. People tend to get weird in the summer and go back to normal later, I guess because of having a routine and not having so much free time which leads to overthinking. The thing is, is this whole "not now" thing really the end and I'm not letting go, or is not now really what she needs and I have to be patient? P.s. I can guarantee there is no other guy involved, so you can rule that out.
jphcbpa Posted July 18, 2013 Posted July 18, 2013 I think you have to take her at her word and start taking care of you.
ChatroomHero Posted July 18, 2013 Posted July 18, 2013 You've indicated you'll wait for her. She told you not to. You have 2 choices: 1. Move on and look for other people without the thought of her suddenly coming back any day hanging over your head. 2. Torture yourself waiting until one day you learn she suddenly became ready with some other guy. It's a tough choice to make when you are in the middle of it but you know exactly what choice you have to make. Are you man enough to make it?
dasein Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 Everything was great untill she started getting confused and saying she doesn't want to be in a relationship right now. There is only one reply to this that works IME, "I understand." Then leave immediately without anger or pouting, just matter of fact, remove yourself entirely from their life, and don't ever call or contact that person again until they call you and tell you they made a huge mistake. And what I mean by "works" is it allows you to quickly move on to other better options. Life is too short to be with people who aren't enthusiastic about being with you. Way too short. 1
hppr Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 The thing is, is this whole "not now" thing really the end and I'm not letting go, or is not now really what she needs and I have to be patient? Don't wait on her. Go live your life, have fun, meet other girls, just plain do stuff and keep busy. If she calls back fine if not well...you will have other things on your mind. 1
BradJacobs Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 There may not be somebody physically with her now but that doesn't mean she's not carrying on with someone over FB or other means. Don't wait means to move on. She's washed her hands of anything you'll feel torturing yourself. Take her advice.
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