BradJacobs Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 I'm kind of thinking there's a whole lot of THAT going on in the security guard car that he's sitting in 8 hours a day.... It's a sedentary job which typically lends itself to eating just to keep oneself occupied. If he fits the mall cop stereotype, then he snacks on donuts and crap throughout the day every day that he works. Weight gain + hating what you do for a living = loss of sex drive. 1
shexy Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 I'm confused still, one minute he can get hard, the next minute he can't? I mean, honestly, if guy CAN get hard, he WILL if you're going down on him. For real. 25 is really young to get ED.....unless he's what all the previous posters said: depressed, on medication, gained weight, etc. He could have low testosterone, but it's really really really rare for this to happen to a guy that young. And of course it's possible that he IS sleeping with someone else. Don't rule it out jsut caus you don't want to believe it. I thought the same thing about my ex husband "when would he possibly have the time to be screwing someone else?". Well, guess what, he was!
charlietheginger Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 some guys are not the sex craved perverts portrayed By the media.... Some guys crave cuddling hugging watching tv on the Couch with his head on a women lap.... Just how it is. When i met a women my first thoughts Are about rollerblading and riding bikes together. Laying On a blanket cuddling under the stars as the wind from The ocean blows over are faces,pushing her back and fourth on a parkswing, chatting over coffee wanting to know more About her. Bending her over and fooking is really not that big a deal
crude Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 This is part of a trend I've noticed. Men aren't as interested in sex as they used to be. Not just married men who figure once a month is better than once a week, but guys who prefer fishing and drinking with their male friends than girlfriends, or guys who break up even though the next date meant sex. Men aren't only after one thing, despite what women think of men. Testosterone levels have been declining in the male population. Testosterone levels have fallen in American men over the past 2 decades
stillafool Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 I think your bf loves you but is not in love with you anymore. The mystique is gone. I agree with another poster who said you didn't have sex until the honeymoon phase of your relationship was over. I think he views sex with you as work and that's why he can't maintain an erection with you. If he does get hard but loses it when you touch him, it isn't a problem with his penis.
Els Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 How do you reconcile this: Physically he's fine. He can get hard but either doesn't or doesn't want to do anything even though he's hard. with this: No matter what I do he doesn't get hard. ? So does he get hard or not? 1
Els Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 some guys are not the sex craved perverts portrayed By the media.... Some guys crave cuddling hugging watching tv on the Couch with his head on a women lap.... Just how it is. When i met a women my first thoughts Are about rollerblading and riding bikes together. Laying On a blanket cuddling under the stars as the wind from The ocean blows over are faces,pushing her back and fourth on a parkswing, chatting over coffee wanting to know more About her. Bending her over and fooking is really not that big a deal True. But you do realize that there is a HUGE spectrum between 'sex crazed', and never wanting it at all? Most healthy folks fall somewhere along the middle 2
KatZee Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 I don't think he has an erectile issue. He CAN get it up. He gets morning wood, and then when he masturbates he gets hard. The issue is when she goes down on him or tries to initiate something, nothing is happening. Maybe he's not in love anymore, not as attracted, or the sex isn't good for him and he views it as work and not real enjoyment. He won't even make out with you, so he doesn't even want to be physically intimate with you at all. That's a huge flag. Curious why the wait for sex was so long, and if he waited that long and now doesn't have an issue not having sex with you... it could be that he's getting it elsewhere, or you guys are just not sexually compatible. He doesn't seem to be too concerned about no sex, and hasn't mentioned seeing a doctor or anything. Does he masturbate often to O?
giblesp Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 My boyfriend doesn't really want to have sex anymore. He's 25 and Im 21. We've been together for 18 months but only having sex for the last 2 months. For the first couple weeks he wanted to have sex 1-2 times a day. Now he hardly ever wants to. No matter what I do he doesn't get hard. He use to always want to in the morning but now he just gets out of bed and goes on the computer. The only problem he had in past relationships was he didn't last long enough. He's been with 10 people and has never not wanted sex like this. He just keeps saying he doesn't feel like it. I don't know what Im doing wrong. I've only had sex with him. I feel like Im not hot enough or good enough at sex. He's done a lot of stuff with a lot of people, including 3 somes, so it's not normal for him to not want ANYTHING. He doesn't even want to make out very much anymore. But he's NOT cheating. He's at home all the time, we live together. If he's not at home he's either at baseball (and I go as well) or he's at work. For work all he does is sit in his car (parking lot security guard) and I can go see him whenever to bring him food or whatever. He occasionally goes out with friends but I know all his friends. So trust me, he is not cheating. But he still really wants to be with me. He keeps saying how happy he is to be with me, wants to marry me, etc. So it's not that he's unhappy with the relationship anymore. Talk to him, tell him how it feels for you. Let him know that it is an issue for you and you'd like to enjoy connecting with him sexually. He should be able to come back at you with a good reason as to why he doesn't want to make love to his girlfriend. And maybe take some steps in resolving it. Communicate, get to the bottom of it and give it some time. If it doesn't resolve and you're still frustrated in the relationship, there are many men out there to choose from and you're in the prime of your life.
kaylan Posted July 19, 2013 Posted July 19, 2013 (edited) Sounds like hes got a lot of mental roadblocks. And sounds like he may have PE too. I say that because dudes with PE tend to avoid sex sometimes and can have a lot of sexual anxiety which can make them lose their erection. In any case, follow some of the advice already given to you OP. However, Ill be realistic and say I dont think youll be sticking with this ship too long =/This is part of a trend I've noticed. Men aren't as interested in sex as they used to be. Not just married men who figure once a month is better than once a week, but guys who prefer fishing and drinking with their male friends than girlfriends, or guys who break up even though the next date meant sex. Men aren't only after one thing, despite what women think of men. Testosterone levels have been declining in the male population. Testosterone levels have fallen in American men over the past 2 decades Americans have become more sedentary. We work out less, and increasing do jobs that require less physical work. Seeing as exercise (especially strength training) increases hormones levels like testosterone, that link isnt a surprise. I stay in the gym myself. Its increased my already high sex drive =P Edited July 19, 2013 by kaylan
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