Oldcatskinner Posted July 18, 2013 Posted July 18, 2013 Loveshackers, I thought I would share with you my thoughts of the past day. For some reason, my ex was on my mind for most of the day. Not an overbearing, few hours past breakup type thought, but more of a looming presence. It was quite perplexing, as I am nearing two months of "no contact" with her. Then, it struck me. Today marked the midpoint of our birthdays, and I remembered that we made a comment about that once when we were together. So how can it be okay, you might ask? Well, let me explain. 1. I have accepted that the relationship with her is over 2. I have realized that there were things in my life that I was not proud of; insecurity about abandonment, neediness, and the thought that I may be perpetually single. 3. I sought help for these issues, and realized that I can apply the same practice in the ways and things I am successful at to work on the areas that need improvement. 4. I have taken responsibility for my actions, and realize that at my very best, the only person I can control is myself. 5. I choose to live. Here are some things about the relationship that I have learned: 1. I am thankful for it. Even though it did not work out like I had wanted, SHE was what I wanted and for a time, my dreams came true. 2. I am glad that she was good to me during the relationship. 3. When it was over, I respected her for her strength to be upfront about it, and cut me off. Without this seemingly harsh treatment, I would have gladly let myself be strung along, and there are untold worlds of what might have happened then. 4. I was glad that I fought for the relationship after we broke up. This solved my "what if" question. I fought until my heart said "no more." This was long after my head said it was over. Know this-I said fight for the relationship. I would fight for her to this day were she in trouble and I could do something to help. 5. I was glad that I loved someone, and that she accepted my love for a duration of time. This was the most beautiful lesson of them all. So here I am now, moving forward, and the sunshine has come through those cold cloudy skies. OCS 4
HeartDesires Posted July 24, 2013 Posted July 24, 2013 It sounds like you're filled with gratitude and that's a good thing
The Situation Posted July 24, 2013 Posted July 24, 2013 Interesting post, I liked this bit mostly: 4. I have taken responsibility for my actions, and realize that at my very best, the only person I can control is myself. Taking responsibility for my actions is something I kick myself for constantly. I can't accept any decisions I make. Maybe there's hope, after all!
agb Posted July 26, 2013 Posted July 26, 2013 This is great! You honestly sound just like me, in terms of looking back at the relationship. I look at my ex and the relationship in the same light. I'm happy that it happened. I'm happy that she was her best with me. Am I sad that it didn't work out? Of course, and I wish that it could work out to. But looking things in a negative light only does me harm This quote has really helped me get through things and maybe it can do the same for others. "Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." The decisions and choices are in our hands.
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