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Reasons people are single, because they don't do the bar scene?

irc333

By irc333
in General Relationship Discussion

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irc333 Established Member

irc333

Posted
Posted

I was reading this profile of a very pretty lady living in my area...she has to be new, so she mentioned and says she gets this question ALL the time....

 

"Why's a pretty lady like you doing on a dating site??"

 

She said she "has a work life and doesn't do the bar scene". She's a nurse and she makes it sound like an online dating site is the only means in which to meet men?

 

Are some people under the impression the ONLY way to meet people, is at a bar?

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Emilia Established Member

Emilia

Posted
Posted

"Why's a pretty lady like you doing on a dating site??"

 

She said she "has a work life and doesn't do the bar scene". She's a nurse and she makes it sound like an online dating site is the only means in which to meet men?

 

Are some people under the impression the ONLY way to meet people, is at a bar?

:confused: no she just wants people to stop asking stupid questions

  • Like 5
supaflyz Established Member

supaflyz

Posted
Posted

The bar scene isn't the right place to find a person you want to have a future with. I just got home from the bar today. I venture out to club and bar a lot lately after my breakup with my ex. I met some old friends from the past. They change so much. The alcohol, drugs, etc. Not the place to find the right person.

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Philosoraptor Established Member

Philosoraptor

Posted
Posted
Are some people under the impression the ONLY way to meet people, is at a bar?

Some people are, as media glorifies it as the ideal spot to meet your future mate.

Seductive Established Member

Seductive

Posted
Posted

people are single, because they aren't taking advantage of what's out there.

 

There are salsa dancing classes, hiking groups, jogging groups, church groups, volunteering, bookstores, seminars, continuing education classes, bootcamps, meeting people through friends and the list goes on.

 

You have to really go out there, get active and find something that gives you meaning. Work alone, hanging out, or relying on OLD isn't always effective.

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Seductive Established Member

Seductive

Posted
Posted

True, but you get what you see.

hotpotato Established Member

hotpotato

Posted
Posted

Online dating is the most convenient way to meet people. I imagine her career doesnt let allow her much free time.

 

Besides, many people in school or work are already taken. Colleges nowadays are awash with females. I was never asked out in college. The furthest I got was letting a guy walk me to the car. The only guys who approach me outside the net are the guys who approach most any halfway attractive female.

 

All of my relationships have started on the net. If not for OlD i never ever would have met any of them. As more and more people meet their partners online, its only natural the reputation of online dating improves.

MissBee Established Member

MissBee

Posted
Posted (edited)

OLD is indeed convenient. One can sit at home and browse profiles and find someone to go out with relatively quickly. It's also a given that when you're online dating everyone you come across is there for the same reason, i.e. to get a date/sex/relationship. However, that convenience comes with its own unique challenges and problems.

 

I don't OLD anymore because I prefer the organic setting of meeting people in offline, day to day settings. It's more difficult to make a connection, as in these settings people aren't necessarily there for dating purposes, so it's less straightforward and more of a shot in the dark, but I suppose I like the process of getting to know someone and it slowly becoming more versus the OLD scene where some people want to totally forego friendship and want to meet up and have sex or immediately be a couple. Haven't online dated since about 2009, and I've still had dates, but admittedly not as many dates as I had while I had a dating profile providing me with a steady stream of potential matches. Sometimes I would think "Maybe I should try it again", when my dating life seemed slow then I'm like ugghh...there is something I really dislike about sifting through all that nonsense and I was turned off enough to not bother.

 

However, it makes sense in this day and age that pretty or not, OLD seems like a sure way to land a date (how it eventually turns out is another story lol). Being pretty doesn't mean men come up to you at work, at the grocery store, while you're pumping gas etc. to ask you out. They do sometimes, but not always, so I can understand how pretty or not, some prefer being in a space like dating sites where it is known upfront that all interactions are toward that end.

Edited by MissBee
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irc333 Established Member

irc333

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Yeah, I see a pretty woman in public, her boyfriend is usually just around the corner. Be it a bookstore or coffee shop.

 

I do seek out "the ring" on her finger, and If I see none, I attempt to chat her up...but only if I have good reason. Like I was at a coffee shop, waiting on my barista to finish my brew.

 

I saw a pretty woman ( no ring) order something a bit different than mine, its a flavor I have yet to try...so we're both...waiting....figured I'd be good reason enough to talk about what flavor she ordered.

 

But I got a lot of "short" answers, nothing more...she seemed rather stand-offish.

 

See, in public....there's that "Stranger danger" element women have...they just assume be left alone, like in my situation.

 

 

OLD is indeed convenient. One can sit at home and browse profiles and find someone to go out with relatively quickly. It's also a given that when you're online dating everyone you come across is there for the same reason, i.e. to get a date/sex/relationship. However, that convenience comes with its own unique challenges and problems.

 

I don't OLD anymore because I prefer the organic setting of meeting people in offline, day to day settings. It's more difficult to make a connection, as in these settings people aren't necessarily there for dating purposes, so it's less straightforward and more of a shot in the dark, but I suppose I like the process of getting to know someone and it slowly becoming more versus the OLD scene where some people want to totally forego friendship and want to meet up and have sex or immediately be a couple. Haven't online dated since about 2009, and I've still had dates, but admittedly not as many dates as I had while I had a dating profile providing me with a steady stream of potential matches. Sometimes I would think "Maybe I should try it again", when my dating life seemed slow then I'm like ugghh...there is something I really dislike about sifting through all that nonsense and I was turned off enough to not bother.

 

However, it makes sense in this day and age that pretty or not, OLD seems like a sure way to land a date (how it eventually turns out is another story lol). Being pretty doesn't mean men come up to you at work, at the grocery store, while you're pumping gas etc. to ask you out. They do sometimes, but not always, so I can understand how pretty or not, some prefer being in a space like dating sites where it is known upfront that all interactions are toward that end.

MrCastle Established Member

MrCastle

Posted
Posted

The bar is just one way, albeit a popular one, to meet people.

 

OLD is another.

 

My dating life would be more active if I did either of those things but refuse to do both.

 

I am knowingly and willingly missing out on potential prospects because I prefer to meet people on my terms. Not force myself to do something I don't like, like go to a bar to try OLD just for the sake of finding a mate.

 

I live my life the way I want and whoever I meet on my journey are the ones I date.

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