Chris715 Posted July 16, 2013 Posted July 16, 2013 My first day of "NC" if I can call it that considering I will still see her at work every day for the next month and a half. I'll admit I tried to get close to her again after breaking NC when she started working with me. Big mistake, she said I made her uncomfortable and she doesn't want to get close to me again. Came home from work tonight and completely alone right now. Too late to really hang out with friends or anything like that, no idea where my family is right now, basically just feeling like ****. Anyway, figured I would post this and vent instead of trying to call her or something stupid like that. Wish I could just move on and find another girl who could make me happy, easier said than done I guess.
AllTooWell Posted July 16, 2013 Posted July 16, 2013 Hi Chris, I'm sorry you're going through a hard time right now I know how you feel. It's also late here. I am 2 weeks NC and in some ways, I have become okay with being alone. Some nights it sucks. Especially right now because my mom (who I'm with for the summer) is out of town so I have the house to myself. I have started pushing him from my mind during the day (I let the thought come, and then don't dwell on it, just carry on with my day). If I feel like I really need it, I have 15 minutes while I walk my dog around 11PM where I think about him, how it ended, how I miss him, etc. Then I come home, watch TV and get ready for bed You may not remember but there was a huge period of your life where you didn't know this girl. It may seem mindblowing even! But your happiness is not tied to anyone else. That can be really hard to accept, especially when your heart is hurting so much. You are doing the RIGHT thing by going NC, I can't stress that enough. It is going to be really hard at times (I can't imagine how hard it must be to work with your ex) but it will make things so, so much easier for you. Getting with another girl isn't going to make you happy. YOU need to make you happy first, before anyone else can. Don't try and replace her and fill that void because it will not end well for you. I hope that tomorrow is better for you. Remember that every day is only 24 hours! Bad or good, you always have tomorrow. Stay strong.
Author Chris715 Posted July 16, 2013 Author Posted July 16, 2013 (edited) Hey, thanks for responding. Didn't call or text her or anything, which is good I guess. She would just get pissed at this point if I did anyway... Don't know all the details of your relationship/break up but I hope you're doing well tonight. Sounds like you've been handling it pretty well, not thinking about it for the most part during the day. Wish you the best Edited July 16, 2013 by Chris715
JDPT Posted July 16, 2013 Posted July 16, 2013 Days and nights are rough without our lost love but in time it'll gradually get better. Keep busy and keep redirecting your thoughts to the now, never get stuck living in the past that will only hinder your chances at recovery. 1
L1ght Posted July 16, 2013 Posted July 16, 2013 Trust me dude, in time you will come to resent the fact that she gave up on the relationship and it will end up being you who can't stand the sight of her anymore. I'm one year of NC and honestly every time I think about my ex I just wanna punch her in the face(metaphorically speaking of course) for how short sighted and selfish she was.....its true, as time goes by you will pick a million faults out that she was guilty of and you will realise they she doesn't have a clue what she has missed out on in life by turning her back on you. Keep your chin up and do the things you love to do in life, study/work hard and socialise often with your friends while keeping your eyes open for new romance.....the sooner you focus on your own life the better. Good luck.
lessica Posted July 16, 2013 Posted July 16, 2013 I am sorry, that is a sucky situation. This is the thing with contact.. which is especially hard when you have to see them. It means that someone else does have the power to influence how we feel. It is tough. I truly know that any seeing/communicating with my ex will confuse the hell out of me. So no contact is just about the only thing I can do to protect myself. It is hard, I find nights the hardest as well... You are not alone at all, and as everyone says, you will feel better, time is your best friend right now. Hang in there x 1
onearthur Posted July 16, 2013 Posted July 16, 2013 Hey Chris, Hope it's become easier for you, breaking up is right up there with grieving the loss of a loved one and thats why moving on is soo painful. I was with my partner for 8 years, got cheated on, so I broke up and it was incredibly painful for me to immediately stop making contact as it had become a natural habit to email/text/call many times a day. Fast forward 6 months on and I am sleeping better, not thinking about my partner as much, even though my partner is now with someone, has moved country, got a better job, yadda yadda yadda... I knew deep down that breaking up was the right thing to do, but that gut/voice/6th sense had lost it's voice which over time I was finally able to find and it is now powerful. As lessica put it, keep focusing on the now. Stay active and healthy, going for a walk everyday I found was very helpful in clearing out my mental intray that during these times fills up pretty quickly and you loose sight of yourself. Hope that helped. Let us know how you are doing. 2
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