afteralltheseyears Posted October 23, 2004 Posted October 23, 2004 Help!! I need some good advice. I have been dating this guy for 6 years, he would have done anything for more, loved me unconditional, but almost to an obsessive point. He pushed me too much to be where he was at. The more he pushed, the more I backed off. We had great times together, enjoyed each others company, cared tremendously for each other but I was just not ready for marriage. He is the type of person who needs someone by his side 24/7. I need some space. After six years, he decided he'd had enough and within 2 weeks of the break up starting dating an ex neighbor of mine who I never liked (he claims he didn't know I knew her until a week after he met her, at that point I believe he should have not continued dating her). Anyway, it took that for me to realize I cared for him more then i was letting myself know. He is angry and hurting and so I am. But it was been two months and he seems to have jumped full force into this new relationship. Says he still misses me and thinks about me but this is where he needs to be right now. Why do I still care? Should I just walk away. I feel he is being unfair, but understand he put a lot into our relationship that I could not give back at the time. It makes it harder because she owns a business about 1/2 mile from house on a main intersection that I travel numerous time a day. The two of them are usually there and it's just hard to see that. I've voiced that to him but he really doesn't seem to understand it. Why can't I just walk away?
bluechocolate Posted October 23, 2004 Posted October 23, 2004 at that point I believe he should have not continued dating her The two of them are usually there and it's just hard to see that. I've voiced that to him but he really doesn't seem to understand it. Huh?? If he's free & single he can date whoever he chooses. Sure it would be nice for you if he dated someone miles away that you didn't know & never had to see but if your relationship is over then in reality he owes you no such courtesy. Is he rubbing his new relationship in your face or is it just that you have to drive by her place of business everyday? Why do you feel he is being unfair? By your own admission he wanted more than you were willing to give & he waited 6 years to see if you would come around. I'm sure you realise that that is a long time to wait for someone who wants to marry & start a family. Why do I still care? I don't know. Maybe after 6 years of calling the shots you got used to being in control & don't like it when you're not. Should I just walk away.(?) What other choice do you have? I take it you've told him that you are now ready to give him what he wants? If you're lucky he'll come back to you but if you're telling him he's being unfair & not understanding YOUR feelings then I would think that what you're doing is still pushing him away.
aFighter Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 The old "You don't know what you've got untill you lose it" if he doesn't want to come back then I'm afraid there's nothing you can do but throw some A-1 sauce on your crow. But ask yourself *why* you want him back if he was suffocating you to within an inch of your sanity before?
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