Stargazer111 Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 OK, horrible title, but here's the situation: Within the past week, I met 2 girls at 2 different events. Both want to go on a date with me. They don't know each other. I enjoyed both of their company - nothing beyond platonic activities with either so far - but at this point I still know so little about them that I can't decide who I might want to start a relationship with (if either) - that decision needs to made after a couple of dates. Still, it feels a bit wrong to date 2 different people. Should I just go ahead and date both of them for the time being until I can choose between them? But am I risking losing both opportunities if they find out? Perhaps I should tell them up front what I'm doing? Anyone been in a similar situation as me now?
InsaneTrombone Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 I personally like dating one person and putting my effort into that, but I'm sure you'll hear a lot of 'don't put all your eggs in one basket' posts and such. As for it being wrong, no it isn't. You're still single.
Vials Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 Well, some people might have a different opinion but I think there's nothing wrong with that. You haven't established exclusivity. So you don't need to feel worried. They're probably out seeking the dating pool too. 1
bac Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 OK, horrible title, but here's the situation: Within the past week, I met 2 girls at 2 different events. Both want to go on a date with me. They don't know each other. I enjoyed both of their company - nothing beyond platonic activities with either so far - but at this point I still know so little about them that I can't decide who I might want to start a relationship with (if either) - that decision needs to made after a couple of dates. Still, it feels a bit wrong to date 2 different people. Should I just go ahead and date both of them for the time being until I can choose between them? But am I risking losing both opportunities if they find out? Perhaps I should tell them up front what I'm doing? Anyone been in a similar situation as me now? That is OK to date as many people as you want if the people do not know that. When they know that, it is typically the end of the dating.
phineas Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 Hang with both until you figure it out. If they are attractive you can be assured they are talking to other guys also so maybe one will make the decision for you by going with the other guy.
soccerrprp Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 (edited) Don't assume that the other person is doing it too. Also, don't convince yourself that it is NEVER wrong to engage in multi-dating. If you are engaging in behavior where deceit, manipulation of feelings are involved, there's nothing RIGHT about that. Best policy is to simply reveal that you are multi-dating. If you are assuming that the other person is doing it anyway, then no surprises, right? If she dumps you, well, surprise!!!! Not everyone is doing it, nor does everyone appreciate being strung along until YOU decide which is better. Most of the women I've dated did not multi-date. I did and don't now. It simply stinks. The reason why people don't want to be up-front about multi-dating is b/c they don't want the other person to know that they plan to string her/him along until a decision is made. Deception on the very first date. Ugh. In every first date, the topic of multi-dating comes up (now that I am not doing it) either by myself of my date (which is nice). We bring it out in the open. That's nice too. So, what is the etiquette? Your conscience. Edited July 14, 2013 by soccerrprp
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