mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 April 2011 - I waited 39 years. We had been dating and living together for 14 months. I rented a private Cesna airplane & pilot and flew out of Hayward Airport. We flew over the SF bay towards SF. Spent 20 minutes flying around and over the San Francisco skyline and the Golden Gate Bridge. I had champagne and 2 glasses ready. It was so perfect. It was so awesome. I was so happy. Fast forward 2 years. I am so un-happy. I am so sad. I am so hurt. I don't think I have another one of these in me. How could she do this to me? She still has the ring OK, I've been drinking. But I'm still so hurt, confused and upset. I don't know what to do. I've been NC for 4 months. Will I ever get past this? Be happy again? I dunno...
Exitleft Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 **hugs** I'm sorry. I hope you find someone that exceeds your expectations. Nothing worse than feeling for the first time you found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with only to lose them. I can only hope for your sake and mine there is something better that awaits us. 1
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 **hugs** I'm sorry. I hope you find someone that exceeds your expectations. Nothing worse than feeling for the first time you found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with only to lose them. I can only hope for your sake and mine there is something better that awaits us. Yes. I hope so too. Thought she was the one!!! Really made an effort but didn't pan out... Next time?? 1
Exitleft Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 Yes. I hope so too. Thought she was the one!!! Really made an effort but didn't pan out... Next time?? I think you will find someone better and in fact I hope you do. Surely deserved 1
hellon Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 Wow, that is an impressive effort indeed. I don't know the full story, but stay positive.
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 Wow, that is an impressive effort indeed. I don't know the full story, but stay positive. Meh. Boy and girl start out hot and heavy. And end up cold and distant. Story over...
bluegreen Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 You will and you know why because you did so far !!!! You did not jumped of the bridge slit your wrists or became full blown drinker You lived in pain and sadness but you lived people survive amazing things cancer loss of children wars abuse hunger and loss of homes and jobs. You know just few days ago on Face I saw photo of beautiful young girl painting an amazing portrait with brush in her mouth you know why? She had no arms but what she created floored thousands and it made me ashamed to complain about my issues not that they are small but still. If someone like her can do that and with smile on her face we can survive heartbreak of loosing people who we cared for and it was one sided don't you agree with that ? Loose a bottle it will not help hurt is hurting only as long as you are nursing it 1
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 Of course... There are always those who rise above an extreme struggle.. I get that! Still hard to deal with my micro hard-ship
bluegreen Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 And you shall to I should know I have no doubt its hard but by now it should be less because its all up to you How much you think of it obsess remember or pour over it. You have a power to stop do it what would you have done if it was 14 years? Yet people have been trough that to so starve those things above and relief shall come keep it up and you will keep suffering. Why would you want to ?
thefooloftheyear Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 Cmon, bro I am pullin for you...If I can do it so can you.... Im sure you are sick and tired of hearing the pep talks...At this point either just forget about wonen and focus all your efforts on work or your career or just go out there and start meeting women.. You will quickly realize that shes not Wonder Woman..She is just another xx chromosomed human being...Nothing more.. TFY 2
thefooloftheyear Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 (edited) Exactly no one is irreplaceable Almost.. When it comes to females, my mom and my daughter are irreplaceable..But they are my blood. And they will never let me down...Ill save all my undying affection and loyalty to them...They deserve it most... Fck the other ones.. TFY Bluegreen....please note my signature....please..lol.. Edited July 13, 2013 by thefooloftheyear 1
bluegreen Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 I was speaking strictly in romantic sense of word of course. Hm I did noticed your signature before it puzzled me as it does now. Care to explain it ? 1
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 I know. I get it. I have been pullin' hard for that last 120 days. I am way better off tonight than I was 90 or 100 days ago. Just... Still hurts. Still confusing. Just want it all to be over. Screw her. As many mistakes as I made, she is still losing out, because I gave her everything. And now? Nothing!! Her bad!! As I mentinoed, been drinking whiskey and feelin' some self-pity... OK. Pity party over
thefooloftheyear Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 You will and you know why because you did so far !!!! You did not jumped of the bridge slit your wrists or became full blown drinker You lived in pain and sadness but you lived people survive amazing things cancer loss of children wars abuse hunger and loss of homes and jobs. You know just few days ago on Face I saw photo of beautiful young girl painting an amazing portrait with brush in her mouth you know why? She had no arms but what she created floored thousands and it made me ashamed to complain about my issues not that they are small but still. If someone like her can do that and with smile on her face we can survive heartbreak of losing people who we cared for and it was one sided don't you agree with that ? Lose a bottle it will not help hurt is hurting only as long as you are nursing it There....I fixed for ya... TFY
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 Ok... You right!! Fixed for now!!
thefooloftheyear Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 I know. I get it. I have been pullin' hard for that last 120 days. I am way better off tonight than I was 90 or 100 days ago. Just... Still hurts. Still confusing. Just want it all to be over. Screw her. As many mistakes as I made, she is still losing out, because I gave her everything. And now? Nothing!! Her bad!! As I mentinoed, been drinking whiskey and feelin' some self-pity... OK. Pity party over Are you really better off? be honest... I am all for NC..Its the right thing to do...I do, however, think that all NC does is prevent you from having a setback on the path to a slow indifference... What you need(if you want this to end) is an "a-ha!" moment...A sharp realization that you have reliquished control of your happiness to someone that wouldnt pee on you if you were on fire.. Take back control, my friend... TFY
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 Are you really better off? be honest... I am all for NC..Its the right thing to do...I do, however, think that all NC does is prevent you from having a setback on the path to a slow indifference... What you need(if you want this to end) is an "a-ha!" moment...A sharp realization that you have reliquished control of your happiness to someone that wouldnt pee on you if you were on fire.. Take back control, my friend... TFY I'm listening... And what do you suggest? Facebook stalk to see a new beau?? Don't think I can do that...
bluegreen Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 You have to accept that it will keep hurting but no more then you let it and one day it won't you are not child or teen even as you said you do get it then act like it. Quit sabotaging yourself with drinking you have to many posts here about how it hurts how this how that how long do you plan on doing that? Don't date if you do not want to or are ready but start living without her Its time !!!! Oh I got it very clever 1
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 You have to accept that it will keep hurting but no more then you let it and one day it won't you are not child or teen even as you said you do get it then act like it. Quit sabotaging yourself with drinking you have to many posts here about how it hurts how this how that how long do you plan on doing that? Don't date if you do not want to or are ready but start living without her Its time !!!! Oh I got it very clever Sad, but true. I got ya!!! Probably just having a 'moment', cause actually been clear and focused for the last couple of weeks. Just a having a set-back right now... And thy name is Johnny Walker...
bluegreen Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 (edited) He is right actually you need something to "get you off" this fix about her Because trust me not even Megan Fox is all that and many agree on that. You need to see her as she is yeah take a peek why not see how she is most likely stringing along another fool pretending to be happy or is actually miserable but see some reality. Once you do it might be just what you need to shrug it all off and start healing for good you need that anger that passion that GRRRRR what a b..... Love is another form of illusion kill illusion you kill what ? Edited July 13, 2013 by bluegreen made a mistake
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 He is right actually you need something to "get you off" this fix about her Because trust me not even Megan Fox is all that and many agree on that. You need to see her as she is yeah take a peek why not see how she is most likely stringing along another fool pretending to be happy or is actually miserable but see some reality. Once you do it might be just what you need to shrug it all off and start healing for good you need that anger that passion that GRRRRR what a b..... Love is another form of illusion kill illusion you kill what ? Hmmmm. Good point. But I still don't think I am in FB stalk status yet...
bluegreen Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 Who said anything about stalking ? Its taking a look : ))) no one suggested you sleep on her profile but just take one good look and see. Make a difference between your thoughts and her actual reality it might surprise you how you end up feeling about it. Heck give us a link we'll do it and report it all back 1
thefooloftheyear Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 I'm listening... And what do you suggest? Facebook stalk to see a new beau?? Don't think I can do that... As you know that was the turning point for me..If you cant, dont do it.. I hate to say this because it sounds douchey, but now is the time to be a man..A strong and secure man..One that doesnt let a stupid woman control his life and his happiness-after she unceremoniously dropped you on your head..Picture her and her new guy having fun and laughing at you and your wallowing in the shyt and start to get pissed off.. If you cant find that inner "whatever" , then just let NC do what it so successfully does...get you to a path of indifference..But I didnt want to waste another God damned minute letting this person have control over me. Causing me to lose sleep...Causing me to not show my beautiful daughter the best side of me , not some pathetic sad sack of a man.. Find a way, any way you can...She doesnt deserve any place in your thinking process.. TFY 1
Author mtnbiker3000 Posted July 13, 2013 Author Posted July 13, 2013 Cmon, bro I am pullin for you...If I can do it so can you.... Im sure you are sick and tired of hearing the pep talks...At this point either just forget about wonen and focus all your efforts on work or your career or just go out there and start meeting women.. You will quickly realize that shes not Wonder Woman..She is just another xx chromosomed human being...Nothing more.. TFY See. This is what bothers me!! I found her so attractive. So close to me. I never had this in my first 39 years. Thought she was so perfect. So special... NOT!! Don't know what else might be out there, but, it won't be her... i'm confused!!!
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